Help: Problem w/3 yr old and Seat belts
 

Hello,

Time-out is highly recommended for these issues. Even a child of that young age
can put the ideas of actions and consequences together. Feel free to check out
the article titled "Does Time Out Really Work" at:

www.marriageandfamilies.com

Hope this helps :o)

Default User wrote:

Friends of mine who refuse to spank their child have a serious problem as
the child will not put her seatbelt on or allow anyone to. She simply hates
seatbelts, so they give in. I told them this could be dangerous. They
explained to her the importance of the seat belt and they are at wits end.

Any possible solutions for them will be welcomed.

Thank you...

marriageandfamilies.com wrote:

Hello,

Time-out is highly recommended for these issues. Even a child of that young age
can put the ideas of actions and consequences together.
----------------------
That's abusive. If they can understand actions and consequences then
you must take the time to gain their cooperation by explanation and
agreement, just like you have to do with an adult, you lazy, abusive
piece of crap!

If they are NOT able to fathom cause and effect, then you don't punish
them, you simply put a pacifier in their mouth, and belt them yourself!


Hope this helps :o)
--------------
It doesn't, you stupid clown. NOTHING I hate worse than commercial
spammers who think they have a corner on good advice.
Steve



Default User wrote:

Friends of mine who refuse to spank their child have a serious problem as
the child will not put her seatbelt on or allow anyone to. She simply hates
seatbelts, so they give in. I told them this could be dangerous. They
explained to her the importance of the seat belt and they are at wits end.

Any possible solutions for them will be welcomed.

Thank you...

: ----------------------
: That's abusive. If they can understand actions and consequences then
: you must take the time to gain their cooperation by explanation and
: agreement, just like you have to do with an adult, you lazy, abusive
: piece of crap!

Can you reason with a 3-year-old? I've never had a 3-year-old so I wouldn't
know. But I can't see why it has to be an argument. If she "refuses" to
belt herself in, then why does she have to "let" anybody else do it? Strap
her in yourself!
--
ColoradoSkiBum

: No, you can't usually reason with a 3 year old ;-)

So "explaining to her the importance of seat belts" is like trying to
explain particle physics then. Like I said, strap her in yourself and put a
padlock on it if you have to to prevent her from unbuckling it. Until she's
old enough make the decision herself, there should be no argument. Not
worth losing your child over.
--
ColoradoSkiBum

On Sat, 6 Sep 2003 11:49:24 -0600, "ColoradoSkiBum"
wrote:

: ----------------------
: That's abusive. If they can understand actions and consequences then
: you must take the time to gain their cooperation by explanation and
: agreement, just like you have to do with an adult, you lazy, abusive
: piece of crap!

Can you reason with a 3-year-old?

Yes, actually you can. They don't understand everything, but they are
often willing to listen and cooperate if you explain what is
happening.

I've never had a 3-year-old so I wouldn't know.

ok

But I can't see why it has to be an argument. If she "refuses" to
belt herself in, then why does she have to "let" anybody else do
it? Strap her in yourself!

A three year old can often undo a seat belt, so even if you do belt
her in, you may find that s/he undoes the belt and refuses to
cooperate unless you find a way to help him or her understand
that it is necessary to stay belted.

Now, I do agree that the choice here is not one you can give to the
child since it involves safety. And the parent can and will insist on
the child's wearing the seat belt or not going on a car trip. But
most of the time, the child *will* cooperate after you explain and
after you tell him or her that the choice is either to wear the seat
belt or not to ride in the car at all.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..
Outer Limits

: In our car, seatbelts are mandatory for
: everyone. The car does not move until all seatbelts are buckled, and
: that includes adults that may think they're old enough to decide for
: themselves.

For me, it's, "if *I* can get a ticket for it, then you wear it. If *you*
will be the one getting the ticket, then make up your own mind. In
Colorado, that means everyone under 16 has to put it on before we move.
--
ColoradoSkiBum

ColoradoSkiBum wrote:

: ----------------------
: That's abusive. If they can understand actions and consequences then
: you must take the time to gain their cooperation by explanation and
: agreement, just like you have to do with an adult, you lazy, abusive
: piece of crap!

Can you reason with a 3-year-old? I've never had a 3-year-old so I wouldn't
know.
----------
Sure you can, you have to sit down on the floor wherever you are and
take the time, that's all. Adults don't LIKE doing that, they believe
that if their almight purposes and reasons can be "brought low" by a
child that they are being demeaned, but that only comes from them
having been dishonored themselves as a child, or it wouldn't worry
them.


But I can't see why it has to be an argument. If she "refuses" to
belt herself in, then why does she have to "let" anybody else do it? Strap
her in yourself!
--
ColoradoSkiBum
-------------
If the child is insensible, like an infant, but if they can recognize
what is going on then they can be talked with about it.
Steve

Nan wrote:

On Sat, 6 Sep 2003 11:49:24 -0600, "ColoradoSkiBum"
wrote:

Can you reason with a 3-year-old? I've never had a 3-year-old so I wouldn't
know. But I can't see why it has to be an argument. If she "refuses" to
belt herself in, then why does she have to "let" anybody else do it? Strap
her in yourself!

No, you can't usually reason with a 3 year old ;-)

Nan, mom to a 3.6 yo!
------------
Steve, father to two former 3 y/o's:
Of course you can, if you care!
Steve

ColoradoSkiBum wrote:

: No, you can't usually reason with a 3 year old ;-)

So "explaining to her the importance of seat belts" is like trying to
explain particle physics then. Like I said, strap her in yourself and put a
padlock on it if you have to to prevent her from unbuckling it. Until she's
old enough make the decision herself, there should be no argument. Not
worth losing your child over.
--
ColoradoSkiBum
---------------
You can make your life lots easier than that by respecting your child.
Steve

On Sat, 06 Sep 2003 23:45:04 GMT, "R. Steve Walz"
wrote:

If the child is insensible, like an infant, but if they can recognize
what is going on then they can be talked with about it.
Steve

I would like to put in a word here about talking to infants about
what you are doing as well.

If you respect the child and tell him or her what you are doing
when you do it, even infants can cooperate. My ds was just
helping my granddaughter get dressed and he would say,
*arm* now and she helped by putting her arm in the sleeve of
the shirt with him. When no one talks to her about it, she struggles
and makes it harder on both her and her parent.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..
Outer Limits