Looking for suggestions............
 

OK..... my soon to be 15 YO boy is moving into the age......

For those of you who know about "sex bracelets" (those thin plastic bracelets
in multiple colors where each color means a different sex act) and teeenage
boys......

I found a sort of diary entry (only one in the school notebook) about him
breaking a girl's bracelet and not performing whatever it was (it didn't
specify what the "act" was to be). He says he chose not to force the matter
because he really cares for this girl and laments his part in getting her back
together with someone "she was going with".

My concern is that he believes these things are real (in the twisted kinda
teenage boy fantasies) and that he really may believe in the future that he is
due something for breaking a bracelet.

Should I address this at all (without reference to the notebook) or should I
just let this go? How would a Mom broach THIS subject without the implication
she found something she shouldn't? Everything I can think of comes back to
knowing something in order to address the situation.... They have stopped with
the news articles since these things have been banned from schools.

Also there is the bigger picture to consider....... even knowing he is a
hormonal teen, how can I get across to him that there should be no
expectations?

Just my 2 cents.........
Christine

Looking for suggestions............
 

On 20 Jul 2004 02:50:24 GMT, unya (Purchgdss) wrote:

OK..... my soon to be 15 YO boy is moving into the age......

For those of you who know about "sex bracelets" (those thin plastic bracelets
in multiple colors where each color means a different sex act) and teeenage
boys......

I found a sort of diary entry (only one in the school notebook) about him
breaking a girl's bracelet and not performing whatever it was (it didn't
specify what the "act" was to be). He says he chose not to force the matter
because he really cares for this girl and laments his part in getting her back
together with someone "she was going with".

My concern is that he believes these things are real (in the twisted kinda
teenage boy fantasies) and that he really may believe in the future that he is
due something for breaking a bracelet.

Should I address this at all (without reference to the notebook) or should I
just let this go? How would a Mom broach THIS subject without the implication
she found something she shouldn't? Everything I can think of comes back to
knowing something in order to address the situation.... They have stopped with
the news articles since these things have been banned from schools.

Also there is the bigger picture to consider....... even knowing he is a
hormonal teen, how can I get across to him that there should be no
expectations?

Just my 2 cents.........
Christine


I don't see any reason to bring it up. Your worries about him
believing the bracelets are "real" or that he's due something appear
unfounded given the incident he wrote about -- he's shown that he
already sees the bracelets for what they are.

It appears you've done a good job teaching your son compassion and
understanding. If he's using writing to sort out his feelings about
things, I wouldn't do anything to get in the way of that. When I was
his age, I learned that what I was writing was subject to exposure to
others -- I stopped writing and have never found another way that
suits me as well as writing did.

I hope the communities that are banning the bracelets realize that by
doing so they're not banning the sex.

lm

Looking for suggestions............
 

"Purchgdss" wrote in message
...
OK..... my soon to be 15 YO boy is moving into the age......

For those of you who know about "sex bracelets" (those thin plastic
bracelets
in multiple colors where each color means a different sex act) and
teeenage
boys......

I found a sort of diary entry (only one in the school notebook) about him
breaking a girl's bracelet and not performing whatever it was (it didn't
specify what the "act" was to be). He says he chose not to force the
matter
because he really cares for this girl and laments his part in getting her
back
together with someone "she was going with".

My concern is that he believes these things are real (in the twisted kinda
teenage boy fantasies) and that he really may believe in the future that
he is
due something for breaking a bracelet.

Should I address this at all (without reference to the notebook) or should
I
just let this go? How would a Mom broach THIS subject without the
implication
she found something she shouldn't? Everything I can think of comes back
to
knowing something in order to address the situation.... They have stopped
with
the news articles since these things have been banned from schools.

Also there is the bigger picture to consider....... even knowing he is a
hormonal teen, how can I get across to him that there should be no
expectations?

Just my 2 cents.........
Christine

I think it sounds as though your son is wise in thinking of the girls
feelings. I would suggest talking to him about the bracelets, regardless if
its not on the news anymore, say you saw a Dr. Phil re-run! lol Ask him his
feelings on the bracelets and if it should be taken seriously. If he thinks
the game is real, basically you just want to talk to him about the
importance of involving sex acts in a relationship. In the end, he is a
hormonal kid, but there are some that still think with their heads. No, not
that head.

If you have never made a habit of going through his notebooks, don't bring
that up.

T