Must...bite..tonuge
 

I went to the gym down the road today to sign up. The man taking care of me
started talking about his 5 month old son (I had both my girls with me) and
he starts going on about what a good sleeper he is. He then tells me how
they started their baby on rice cereal really young. Apparently they
started their baby on solids at 2 months old because his (or her)
grandmother told them it would help the baby sleep through the night. He
going on about how she was right and he slept through the night and now at
5 months he eats "everything!!!". I so had to bite my tongue! No need to go
off on some guy who I will only see for 3 minutes tops. Why oh why do
people not do their research when it comes to babies, either that or they
completely ignored the information they found.

Must...bite..tonuge
 

"Plissken" wrote in message
. 211...
I went to the gym down the road today to sign up. The man taking care of
me
started talking about his 5 month old son (I had both my girls with me)
and
he starts going on about what a good sleeper he is. He then tells me how
they started their baby on rice cereal really young. Apparently they
started their baby on solids at 2 months old because his (or her)
grandmother told them it would help the baby sleep through the night. He
going on about how she was right and he slept through the night and now at
5 months he eats "everything!!!". I so had to bite my tongue! No need to
go
off on some guy who I will only see for 3 minutes tops. Why oh why do
people not do their research when it comes to babies, either that or they
completely ignored the information they found.

....and *why* do they take this misinformation and then try to "help" every
other parent they see by passing their little gems of information on?
Grrr ....

Amanda

Must...bite..tonuge
 

In article ,
Plissken wrote:

Why oh why do
people not do their research when it comes to babies, either that or they
completely ignored the information they found.

Because the number one rule of information searching is that the average
person goes for the information that is pparently the easiest to get. It is
easier to listen to Grandma than read all the guff from the hospital. It is
easier to ask your friends than look it up. Et cetera.

--
Chookie -- Sydney, Australia
(Replace "foulspambegone" with "optushome" to reply)

"Parenthood is like the modern stone washing process for denim jeans. You may
start out crisp, neat and tough, but you end up pale, limp and wrinkled."
Kerry Cue

Must...bite..tonuge
 

Jo wrote:
FlowerGirl wrote:
"Plissken" wrote in message
. 211...

[...]
He then tells me how
they started their baby on rice cereal really young. Apparently they
started their baby on solids at 2 months old because his (or her)
grandmother told them it would help the baby sleep through the night. He
going on about how she was right and he slept through the night and
now at
5 months he eats "everything!!!". I so had to bite my tongue!

[...]
...and *why* do they take this misinformation and then try to "help"
every
other parent they see by passing their little gems of information on?
Grrr ....

It's the whole 'OneTrueWay' fallacy of bringing up children - the
assumption that the same way of doing things is going to work for all
babies. (There's also a cause-and-effect fallacy, of course - we don't
*know* that this baby would have kept waking up at night without the
solids, although I can see that it's an easy conclusion to draw.)

I tell people what the damages could be. I also remind them that because
of these beliefs we are the generation of overweight and unhealthy. That
most people suffer from intestinal disorders, allergies and other health
issues linked back to early feedings.

I also tell them I enjoy being a mum and that getting up is a privilege
not a problem and that I would never be so selfish as to put my needs
before my babies.

I used to bite my tongue with my girls, but now I realize people will
just go on and on trying to "convert" me so now I yap back.

I think the trouble with this is that it can alienate people. Criticism
makes people defensive (especially if it's on a real hot button subject
like the way you bring up your child), and launching into a lengthy rant
in response to a bit of passing conversation does tend to get people to
label you as 'Oh, no, just another looney'. The end result is that
people won't listen to you. Of course, they may well not do so anyway,
but some ways work less well than others.

The best way that I can think of to handle this particular conversation
(which I might or might not have been able to think of if put on the
spot) would be to say, casually, something like "Glad that worked out
for you! Sounds like you were lucky - lots of parents find it has
completely the opposite effect and just upsets the baby's little tummy
so much they sleep worse than before. That's one of the reasons why
paediatrics organisations don't recommend this any more." That lets
people know that there are alternative views and that there are reasons
not to do things that way, without criticising the fact that _they_ did
things that way. At least I hope that's how it comes across. Any
better ideas, anyone?


All the best,

Sarah



--
http://www.goodenoughmummy.typepad.com

But how do we _know_ that no-one ever said on their deathbed that they
wished they’d spent more time at the office?