My daughter has a great husband and beautiful home, good jobs,
etc....just the stress of raising teenage girls as alot of us have been
thru. I think the fact that their father and I divorced when they were
young and he was never alot of support along with the fact that my 2nd
husband and I were only married 8 yrs when he died unexpectedly has
brought us very close together. They all felt like 'their father' died
when it was their step-father. She and her husband always say how much
they appreciate what I do for them and at times don't know what they
would do without my help. They do show their appreciation monetarily
also.

I've told the 14 and 15 yr old that they could come down in the summer
and we could go shopping, to the beach, boardwalk, etc. Both my sister
and I have quite a few kids with families, and expect some of them to
come visit and stay with us and others will stay in a hotel/condo. In
the summer, it is quite expensive to stay in a condo ($2000/wk) or
hotel ($200+night). I told the 19 yr old, she and her boyfriend could
come down for a w/e and have a place to stay...just can't sleep
together :-)

I know it would all work out and it would just take time for them to
see that not really that much would change...it is just the initial
break.\

Louise wrote:
On Sun, 10 Dec 2006 14:48:14 EST, wrote:


Problem is I know have the opportunity to move approx. 2-3 hrs from
'home'. [...]
Problem is 3 of my 4 children are ok with this. I have 1 who is
really upset. She has 3 teenagers who I am close with and do quite a
bit of 'errands' with.

It sounds to me as if your daughter has been taking your help for
granted -- that what she's going to miss isn't your company as much as
she's going to miss your help with her kids. Does your daughter have
a partner and other supporters?

I think you should make the move, because it sounds right for you. I
also think you should continue to reach out to your children and
grandchildren, but not just by you travelling to them. Invite them
to visit you too. For a grandchild's visit, you can buy a bus ticket
and pull out an air mattress. You can let your children know about
nearby motels and bed&breakfast places, so you can invite them for
weekends without feeling obligated to put them all up.

Louise