Paula wrote:
On Sat, 16 Sep 2006 20:53:07 EDT, "beeswing" wrote:

But actually trick or treat wasn't that big a deal for us.

For some reason, it's really important to her this year.

Then let her go. You are picking an age to stop arbitrarily, anyway.
There are no hard and fast rules on it and, as you said, you went
until you were in seventh grade.

No, the last year I was allowed to go was 6th grade, my final year of
elementary school. It hasn't been as easy for me to decide by school
attended because she started middle school in 5th grade...obviously
young.


11 isn't even a teenager yet. Tell
her that her years are numbered but that because it is so important to
her (not because she will be a child until 18), she can go this year.
Use the goodwill engendered by noticing and responding to what seems
to be really important to her whether or not you can understand why to
bolster up your relationship for the oncoming teen years. That will
be much more important to you than what year she stopped trick or
treating, when all is said and done.

--
Paula

I told her that I considered her viewpoint and asked the question in a
newsgroup I respected...and that I was willing to change my mind.

I hope what she learns from this is that I *will* listen to her and her
reasons (but not necessarily in every case agree with her) and that I'm
open to taking advice and suggestions from people whose viewpoints I
respect...and finally, that I'm open to changing my mind if the
evidence weighs that way.

I think those are good lessons for a kid to have no matter what his or
her age.

Thanks for writing.

beeswing