So why do parents continually not only want their perceived "right" to
discipline by hitting, but also become so incredibly verbally abusive on
this ng when challenged about their perceptions? Why would anyone want
to hit children when disciplining, other than out of anger and and a
need for revenge?
I've heard arguments that parents know no alternatives. I don't buy the
argument. I have known and worked with parents that learned to decrease
and even eliminate all spanking as they gained information about the
harmful effects of spanking. I've watched these parents form a closer
bond with their children, and become more functional as a family. None
of these families, even in the most dire of circumstances, had no
alternatives other than hitting their children when they "disobeyed."
They simply believed that spanking was necessary, or they acted out of
anger and a need for power and revenge.
LaVonne
0:- wrote:
WHAT SPANKING DOES FOR KIDS
From Irwin A. Hyman, The Case Against Spanking: How to Discipline Your
Child Without Hitting, (1997), pp. 58-62.
Dr. Hyman is director of the National Center for Study of Corporal
Punishment and Alternatives and professor of school psychology at
Temple University. He has made numerous appearances on national
television shows such as Oprah, Good Morning America, and the Today
show. ...
... While the prospankers interpret the lack of research on the harmful
effects of spanking with preschoolers as proof that it is OK, I
disagree and maintain that there is no reason to ever hit a child. My
summary of the research and the clinical experience of over 30 years
follows:
*
Corporal punishment should not be used in schools, since there is
convincing evidence that it is a significant contributing factor to
emotional, legal and social problems.
*
Frequent and harsh spanking is consistently found to be present
in the lives of boys who are aggressive and disobedient, who lie,
cheat, are destructive with their own and others' belongings, and who
associate with friends prone to delinquency.
*
Frequent and harsh spankings can cause young children to bottle
up their feelings of fear, anger, and hostility. In later life these
children are unusually prone to suicidal thoughts, suicide, and
depression.
*
Despite the age or gender of the child, the family's social class
or ethnicity, whether the child was hit frequently or rarely, severely
or mildly, whether there were high or low levels of interaction and
affection in the home, and regardless of the degree to which specific
situational variables may have mitigated the effects of the punishment,
spanking consistently contributes to lowered self-esteem.
*
In toddlers, many punitive approaches, including spanking, do not
result in compliance, but end simply with the administration of
punishment. (Studies show that preschoolers who are hit are more likely
to be more impulsive and aggressive than those who are not spanked.
Furthermore, toddlers can be taught, using behavioral techniques such
as associating their word for pain with the street or electrical
outlets, to avoid those dangerous situations. Childproofing the house
and monitoring toddlers will avoid the so-called necessity of spanking
to teach children to avoid danger.)
*
Children who are physically punished are more likely to grow up
approving of it and using it to settle interpersonal conflicts. Even
children who have experienced "normal" spankings are almost three times
as likely to seriously assault a sibling, compared to children who were
not physically disciplined.
*
Contrary to popular belief, studies of corporal punishment in
schools indicate that it is not used as a last resort. In fact, it is
too often the first punishment for nonviolent and minor misbehaviors.
Beatings for minor misbehaviors can cause many stress symptoms in
children.
*
Younger children are hit most often; spanking slowly decreases
until late adolescence. This contributes to feelings of helplessness,
and resentment that may lead to withdrawal or aggression toward
caregivers.
*
Boys are hit much more frequently than girls, thereby sustaining
sexual stereotypes.
* In schools, minority and poor white children receive "lickings"
four to five times more frequently than middle- and upper-class white
children. This contributes to racism and classism in our society.
*
Regional comparisons show that the highest proportion of corporal
punishment in America occurs in states of the South and Southwest.
Florida, Arkansas and Alabama have consistently been among the leaders
in the frequency of hitting schoolchildren. It is unreasonable and
unfair that children's location should determine the degree to which
they may be legally victimized.
*
Corporally punished schoolchildren, especially those with
emotional and academic disabilities, have suffered all types of
injuries including welts, hematomas, damage to almost all external and
many internal body parts, and death.
*
Studies demonstrate that eliminating corporal punishment does not
increase misbehavior in home or school. Systematic use of positive
alternatives, however, has been shown to decrease misbehavior
significantly. ...
http://www.nospank.net/hyman2.htm