I do still have tons of time for this, but I'm not sure which way I should
go.
First off, I do NOT agree with the elective C-sections at all...
But, with that said...

With my first, I had an emergency section. It was for a footling breech at,
really, the last possible second. Everything was going fine until that
moment, and then I was rushed to the OR and put out for an emergency
c-section. I didn't have any choice in it at all (obviously) and as it
turned out, it was a HORRIBLE experience for me all around.

I then had 3 successful vbacs with no issues, although I was monitored for
any possible issues of a repeat breech and all that.

So now... This is the last one for me no matter what. This one was actually
a big "uh-oh... SURPRISE!" pregnancy. I have full intentions to get myself
tied up as soon as possible, and my OB told me she can tie my tubes at the
same time if I need a c-section. I understand that with a c-section and
tubal, it's all in the same area and can be done at the same time, once
she's in there anyways. In the past, I have already made it clear to my OB
that I will not agree to an elective c-section unless it's an extreme case
(like it's a known fact that I'll end up in the OR with another section) but
otherwise, I will go in on my own - and even did the castor oil trick that
worked with DD1 when my c-section date was set for that next Monday but
went in with the help of the lovely castor oil, I'm sure, the Thursday
before lol

I'm now sitting here and seriously debating my options. I can either hope
for vbac #4 in a row or I could go in for a c-section after 1 c-section and
3 vbacs. The things I can't quite make up my mind are... well, first, I
just can't fully 'agree' with the elective surgery thing... I also know that
recovery time is far longer with a c-section, plus I'm not 16 anymore.
Right now, I also still have DS that is up bright and early for school every
day, 2 preschoolers and will soon have a newborn to deal with while I
recover... Oh, and I'm basically on my own now that N is not going to be
around here and I will not have him around here (even if it *seems* to make
life easier for me in the short run because I'm not stupid and know it will
not make my life easier in the long run)
With a c-section, it's not a case of in and out within like 24 hours or less
in the hospital as it is with a regular birth. I still have 3 others to
deal with every single day and can't do that laying in a hospital room.
But... I am set on getting my tubes tied, and I'm wondering if it makes a
difference to have it done as soon as possible or wait however long to get
it done after - which would then mean a surgery at a later date and recovery
time as well... Plus finding a sitter again or someone that can stay with
the kids, and leaving a newborn or very small baby with someone for more
than a couple hours... Plus, the driving thing - I know you're legally
impaired after a general and surgery for something like 24 hours (or is it
48 hours??) Anyways, I'm just stuck on this one...
As it is, I will NOT have N in the room with me at the hospital. I doubt
I'll even care enough to call him at all, but no matter what, I do not care
to have him around me after what he's pulled and continues to pull. I
really now don't have much for a coach or partner for delivery... I want and
need my mom to take the kids as she's my only real option for that, and I
suppose in a pinch I could call a friend, but not sure if I really want to
or how comfortable with that I am... I'm just feeling like I'm in such a
mess right now and not sure what I should be doing...