"lu-lu" wrote in message
...
Jessica was a perfect baby to get to sleep, and I think this is partly my
fault for not getting him straight into a routine. Well, kind of. He now
naturally wants to go to bed about 8pm and sleeps really well. I go to bed
at about 10-11pm and he wakes up at midnight. I'm now so tired that I take
him into my bed to feed, and then put him back in his crib, next to the
bed.
Then he realises he's not in my bed and wakes throughout the night until I
just end up falling asleep with him in my bed. I don't like doing this as
I
have narcolepsy, and I'm scared of being a risk.

I would worry about the narcolepsy also probably...do you have problems
waking up, or is it just falling asleep randomly? I'm imagining the narc.
adds to your whole sleep issue. Dh had a problem with it years back, plus I
suspect he has sleep apnea.

The only thing that settles him is being breastfed. I can't give him
formula
as it constipates him, and he screams all night, and expressed bottles
make
him gassy as he's a guzzler. Back when I still have extra strength, I'd
try
and keep him awake longer so as to feed him more and fill him right up,
but
it didn't make any difference. I'm also shattered as I'm just feeding
constantly.If anything, he's getting worse, he did at least used to sleep
until 04.30. i've tried waking him earlier for feeds, but he just gets
unsettled and goes back to the constant waking. Even when he's in my bed
with me, he'll feed all night.
During the day is just as bad. He's always been a clingy baby, but he will
at least go to other people for 15-20 minutes at a time, but there's no
way
I can leave him with DH during the weekend days as he screams the house
down
until I get up. He takes very limited naps during the day unless I'm
holding
him - even in the car and pram he doesn't sleep well. When Jessica goes
for
a 2 hour nap in the afternoon, he'll maybe sleep in his crib for about 30
mins, and then wake me up and I end up falling asleep with him again.

I recommend you look up high needs, Dr. Sears has written encouraging
supportive things to parents of high needs babies. I have one myself, and
for the first year of her life, I didn't get more than an hour or two of
sleep at a time. She had to nurse what seemed like 24/7. And I knew other
babies weren't that way, I had two before her and by 8 months they were
sleeping all night long, while my HN baby was still waking and nursing like
a newborn at a year! It was very depressing and I feel really horrible for
other moms who have to deal with it.

I know that my narcolepsy causes excessive daytime sleepiness (EDS)
anyway,
and I'm aware that the whole condition is worsening, but I can't carry on
like this. If I'd had just one night's sleep lately, I'd be able to give
myself advice, but I can't. If DH gets him during the night, I end up
having
to get up as he screams til he gets me.I know I'm making it worse by
taking
him into my bed, but I'm so tired that I just need to grab sleep where I
can.

At some point I'd probably get to where I'd just give in, and sleep with the
baby in my bed. Sleep deprivation has been used as torture! I do not know
what these are called, but there's a little thing you put on your bed
between you and dh and the baby goes in it. It has slightly raised sides so
that it keeps the baby in place. Maybe it would help to try one of those.
Here's something similar http://shop.nurturecenter.com/snnesuwiin.html but
you can also rig one up yourself.

Also I was wondering, could your dh bring you the baby for nursing and then
take him away afterwards, or is the main problem that the baby will only
sleep with you(for closeness, nursing, torture, whatever) If it's that he'll
only sleep *with you* then that might be something you will end up giving
into. I wasn't against co-sleeping, and in fact did not bother setting up
the crib before I realized there were these sleep issues.

Please, mummies, tell me you went through this, came through the
otherside,
and that you have a magic sleeping wand that I can borrow!

I made it, it was a loooooong 16 months but I did it. One night I had some
butterscotch schnapps before bedtime, I think we'd had company, and then I
nursed the baby and put her down. Well I woke up the next morning, and I
panicked, I thought she was dead, because she didn't wake me up at all. She
was just sleeping lol I woke her up bursting the door open to check on her.
She slept through the night ever since(and I rarely drink so I didnt' drink
her to sleep everynight

Here's the link to some articles by Dr. Sears on high needs:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/5/t050100.asp . Honestly the most helpful
thing for me was resignation. I decided it was happening, I couldn't change
it, I had to live with it and get through it. Once I felt that way it was a
tiny bit easier. Now she's 6(almost-and-a-half), VERY intelligent and
creative and quick. Lots of energy. She goes to bed-easily and
quickly-around 9pm and sleeps right around 12 hours.

I hope something I've said has been useful! I really feel for you. I'm the
one who asked not long ago about how likely it was to have another HN baby
after having one already. They seem to be good birth control!
Marie

Lucy - apologies if any of this makes no sense, I corrected as many
mistakes
as I could!