On Mar 20, 1:32 am, "lu-lu" wrote:
Feeling like it's one of those days. We've been TTC #2 since July, and
nothing's happened. I don't know why it's getting me down more today than
most other days, but I'm getting frustrated. I've been charting so increase
my chances (something I didn't want to do), but now I'm finding it hard to
keep DH committed to the cause, and get him to do the necessary at the right
time. Jessica's just about to be 21 months. If I fell pg right now, she'd be
30 months when #2 is born, a far bigger gap than I ever wanted (18 months
was my plan). I'm now wondering if I want a gap bigger than 3 years, and I'm
not sure I do, which leads me to think, if I don't conceive in the next 6
months, do I give up? Hard day.


Why would you give up? Do you want the age gap more or the child more?

Having had AF arrive two days ago, I'm now guaranteed a gap of at
least 7.25 years between kiddos at this point. I was looking more at
the 2.5-3 year gap range originally.

But you know what? I've found that while it is painful and depressing
at times, really--it has been for the best. My son has Sensory
difficulties and had in depth speech therapy and occupational therapy
and lots of appointments here, there, and everywhere while being
fairly intense emotionally at 2-4 years old. I honestly don't know how
I would have handled it at that time (I'm sure I could have made it
work, but it would have been very difficult).

There are benefits to a larger gap, and as I've met more moms who have
that larger gap (many not planned to be that way), I've come to be
excited about those positive things.

I still get down every time AF arrives (although we've really only
been trying officially for a couple of months--we weren't really
preventing a whole lot previously), but I just keep clinging to the,
"it will happen at the right time." And you know what--if it doesn't
happen before the end of this year, we'll start looking toward
adoption--we always planned to do that anyway at around 8 year of age
for Alexander, so we'll stick with that plan unless we have a newborn
on the way or here.

((hugs))

Sharalyn
mom to Alexander James