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Old March 3rd 04, 06:14 PM
Ron
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Default A slant on spanking


"Stephanie Stowe" wrote in message
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"Doan" wrote in message
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A different slant on spanking

By: Meyerhoff, Michael K Volume: 19 Number: 8 ISSN: 07306725
Publication Date: 01-01-2001 Page: 8 Type: Periodical Language: English

Perspectives on Parenting

If you are an alert parent, you probably have surmised that

professionals
in
the field of psychology have reached something of a consensus on the

subject of
spanking. I refer here to a swat on the bottom with a hand, not hitting

the
child with any sort of object and no hitting hard enough to cause much

more
than a loss of dignity. Thanks to numerous reports that have appeared in

the
popular media, it now seems as though there is overwhelming evidence to
suggest that spanking is a highly detrimental practice which not only is
largely ineffective, but also leads inevitably to some degree of

emotional
damage. Today, mothers and fathers are aware that any type of corporal
punishment is likely to be viewed as child abuse by those who are

authorities
on the subject of early development.

Well, I guess that forces me to stand apart from the crowd. In my

opinion,
this across-the-board condemnation of spanking is based more on personal
attitudes than professional studies. And whatever professional studies

may
be
involved tend to lack a great deal of credibility due to either built-in
biases or faulty research techniques. I have yet to see anything so
substantial and convincing that it would cause me to jump on the

anti-spanking
bandwagon.

Most of the assumptions and assertions I've seen about the alleged

negative
effects of spanking on a young child's mind set are plagued by what I

refer
to as "adultomorphism." The experience is interpreted through the mental

and
emotional processes of an adult - mental and emotional processes that

are
entirely different than those employed by a young child. It is highly
inappropriate to project one's own thoughts and feelings into the heart

and
head of a two-year-old; and most conclusions drawn as a result are

highly
likely to be grossly erroneous.

With regard to the studies that appear to demonstrate the long-term
detrimental effects of spanking, most that I've seen suffer from limited
focus. For example, many report something like "85% of the inmates doing

time
on death row in a federal prison were spanked when they were young

children."
What is not noticed, much less investigated, is that 85% of the

graduates
of
Harvard Medical School were spanked when they were young children as

well.

Meanwhile, my anti-anti-spanking position is not without solid support.

As
a
researcher with the Harvard Preschool Project, I had the opportunity to
participate in the most comprehensive and extensive study of early

development
ever performed. Furthermore, I had the opportunity to look at

experiences
that produced "optimal" outcomes as well as those that produced

"problems."
We had no pre-set notions. We merely observed what happened in families

of
all
kinds.

One of the things we discovered was that in two out of three families

where
children were developing into bright, happy, well-adjusted, responsible

people,
the kids were spanked from time to time - especially in the period from

about
18 months to three years of age. The spankings were not frequent, nor

were
they
brutal, and they never involved paddles, switches, belts, or any other

such
equipment. However, a swat on the behind or a slap on the wrist was not

an
uncommon occurrence.

What we learned is that discipline is a critically important part of

promoting
optimal development, and that effective discipline during this

particular
period is quite difficult. In order to teach a child to be personally

safe
and respectful of others, it is necessary to "speak" to the child in a
"language" he truly understands. And given the limited cognitive

capacities
of a toddler, a small spanking often results in a considerably better
"education" than a prolonged discussion.

Now, I will also distance myself from the "spare the rod, spoil the

child"
crowd. After all, we found that one in three families managed to get

through
even this difficult period without spanking. Clearly, depending upon the

child
and the circumstances, it is possible to be effective with

other-than-corporal
procedures. But it is equally clear that with a lot of children in a lot

of
circumstances, spanking is preferable to disciplinary techniques that

just
aren't working or no discipline at all.

So please note that I am not recommending that all parents place

spanking
in
their arsenal of child-- rearing techniques. On the contrary, I always

urge
mothers and fathers to take steps to avoid as many confrontations with

their
young child as possible, and then attempt to deal with those that

inevitably
occur with whatever non-corporal methods may reasonably be thought to

have
a
genuinely educational impact.

Nevertheless, I recognize there are situations where a spanking just may

be
the best thing for that particular parent to do for their particular

child
at
that particular time. So, if your little one starts to stick a fork in

an
electrical outlet and you slap his wrist, or if he let' s go of your

hand
so
he can rush into heavy traffic and you give him a swat on the bottom as

you
pull him back, don't beat yourself up. And don't let the dirty looks you

get
from holier-than-- thou bystanders or the condemnations from pop

psychologists
on TV talk shows convince you that you've done irreparable damage to

your
child's psyche. Just make sure that the spankings aren't coming along

too
often or getting out of hand.

Otherwise, if you are a loving, caring, sensible parent, I would suggest

that
you keep in mind the following adage that was formulated by the late Dr.

Louise
Bates Ames, a wise, sweet, gentle woman who was the director of the

Gesell

Institute for several decades and regarded as one of the world's

foremost
authorities on early education and development: "If you plan on never

spanking
your child, you'll probably end up doing it the proper number of times."

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter

Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois. His e-mail address is
.

Meyerhoff, Michael K, A different slant on spanking. , Pediatrics for

Parents,
01-01-2001, pp 8.



This is the weirest article I have ever read. Where's the beef?

S


Here.

By Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed. D.

Michael K. Meyerhoff, Ed.D., is executive director of The Epicenter Inc.,
"The Education for Parenthood Information Center," a family advisory and
advocacy agency located in Lindenhurst, Illinois.