Daniel daniel_h_wATyyahooDOTccom wrote in message
...
I'm posting in here because I've not got much (if any) help elsewhere.
Sorry
if this is somewhat long, but allot is going on.

This past September I had to take guardianship of my 14 yr. old sister
(I'm
24 now, 9yrs 2months older) after a police raid (responded to her domestic
violence call for the boyfriend abusing our mother & found allot of
drugs).
Either I took her or DHS would (having grown up in that one myself, I
didn't
want that to happen to her). We've only met up in 1998, then didn't really
see each other until end of 2000, & didn't spend allot of time together
until mid 2002, followed by her staying with a friend & myself in summer
2003 (before the 9-2003 raid). She hardly talks to her mom (who chose to
live with her boyfriend rather than try to get her back) & her father only
shows up around holidays to pay her, say he's sorry for not being around,
make more promises he has no intention of keeping, then leave until next
time. There is no other family other than 1 of our other 2 sisters that
she
talks to.

Everything was fine at first & we moved into a mobile home I'd bought in
October 2003. In early January, she started seeing a 19.5yr old boy & soon
classified themselves as "dating". Since then her grades have went down (A
&
B to few Cs & an F on a recent progress report, due to missing a test from
skipping school to be with him), she's been going behind my back on
anything
related to him. They're kissing, not sure about sex yet, wouldn't surprise
me either way though, he even pierced her upper ear, something she knew I
&
her mom were OK with IF SHE GOT IT DONE PROFESSIONALLY, now possible talk
of
a tattoo though may not be in a place I'd have non-spying reason to see.
He
used to spend allot of time over here until I caught her laying on top of
him & made the rule that she keep the bedroom door open, now if I'm gone
he's over, if I'm here she's gone (she claims its because he doesn't feel
welcome, but I noticed the change when I started enforcing the rule).

I've been logging her MS Instant Messenger chats, now installed a
key-logger, & want to do more. I know from this what has been going on
(but
she's recently turned to phone only, hardly chat). In early February I had
evidence to show that he's supplied her with drugs (think only marijuana
so
far, which she's already had), cigarettes, he has access to alcohol (his
father allows), & they talked about her giving him a lap dance, then
showering together for valentines day. I took this chat log to the police
(he's 19, she's 14), but they gave the usual "blow-off" response & said
that
since they didn't come right out & say what was going on (used code words
&
phrases, which though are obvious, I guess you need non-code for evidence)
&
since she was pushing it, even though he was agreeing to it & suggesting
it
sometimes, they said SHE had to file the report against him (even though
I'm
her guardian). I couldn't even get a protective order against him. Also
his
parents both know about her age & their relationship, but they don't care
(I've got chat log to show he controls them, tells them to back off about
it).

I'm going away this next week (spring break), she'll "be with friend",
though I've got more log to suggest otherwise. She's tried to convince me
to
let her stay over at his place, claims his mom asked (was more likely
forced
into being willing), & claims that she'll be on the couch (we all know
better).

I'm looking for hardware or software or other surveillance ideas. The only
way this will work (without causing her to go completely behind my back)
is
if I can push this far enough to put him away, take some severe action
against his parents for allowing things to continue IN THEIR HOME
(remember,
the cops say my chat logs aren't enough to press charges, I have to catch
them in the act & still may need evidence)...basically it's either
everything or nothing. (talking does not work, he's convinced her that I'm
just an over protective brother...most adults think otherwise & my problem
is that all adults she knows other than myself & my girlfriend support her
&
what he's getting her into...so I've got ALLOT against me in this area).

--

There are 10 types of people in this world...
...those who understand binary & those who dont.



Wow....

That is commendable that you are taking care of your sister. I am going to
leave the issues about getting evidence against the boyfriend to others who
may have dealt with the police in something like this. I will suggest that
its likely even if you do get this boyfriend put away, there will just be
another one to fill his void. This 14 year old has many issues going on.
Abuse? Neglect? A father that doesn't care, ect. She is only 14 but it
sounds as though she has WAY to much freedom. Kids will do bad things if
they have to much free time. I image you are working, as most of us have to
do and that it makes it hard for you to be with her all the time. First, she
needs to be seeing someone professional. She is drinking, doing drugs and I
hate to say this, I would bet it all she is having sex. Second, get her
involved in some positive activities. Sports, community stuff, anything that
is around there. Third, I know we are need a break but you are leaving for
spring break when you know that she is going to go wild. You took the parent
role, its a full time job.

Tiffany