"Holy Penicillin" wrote in message
oups.com...
Jeff wrote:

I teach science to inner city middle schoolers.

What kind of "science," may I ask? I hope it's Creation Science.
That's the only True Science. The Theory of EVIL-ution is of the
devil. Most of the 'science" taught in those pitiful public schools is
secular humanistic nonsense. When I come to Power all forms of
Darwinian heresy will be outlawed and the Bible will replace the flawed
"Principia Mathematica" and "The Origin of Species."


Jeff writes: Evidence based science. That's the only type. For it to be
science, you have to be able to test ideas and be able to show they are
false. There is no conflict between religion and Evolution. The Catholic
Church accepts that evolution occurred and continues to occur.

If I don't spoil the children in my class, they will spoil my face. With
their fists. Sorry, no choice if I like my face.

Are you saying you let them walk all over you? Our Holy Church
operates several private Christian schools. Parents must agree to
allow our teachers to administer corporal punishment in class whenever
it is needed. We also have a whipping post in the schoolyard for
incorrigible offenders.

Jeff writes: I am not sure corporal punishment is the answer. All you're
doing is teaching students that it is ok to hit.

BTW, I realize that the original post was a parady, made in fun. So was my
reply.

However, my above two statements (about evolution and science and corporal
punishment), I am very serious.

If only that were the law. I could get rid of all those students who don't
work because they have social problems, like living in shelters, in foster
care, etc.

Have you bothered investigating the causes of those social problems?
Most of the time it's sin. Our Holy Church runs several missions for
the downtrodden and dispossessed -- most of whom are African Americans
who've been oppressed by greedy illegal immigrants.

Jeff: Most of them have been suppressed by greedy white folk, like the ones
who used to own them. For decades, if blacks had school, they were inferior
schools because of a lack of money. The way students are mistreated by my
school is a sin. Black people are every bit as good and worthy as white
people.

So most of the time, you're right: It is sins. Sins of the white people who
had the oppurtunity to treat them properly and didn't. The immigrants and
black people want just the same thing as I want: a chance for a good life.

Back on May Day,
when the Mexicans were revolting, I spread a Mexican flag on the floor
in place of a doormat and turned away any Spanish-speaking immigrants
who wanted to boycott American businesses and services. My Black
patrons were only too happy to trample the Mexican flag. What about
the rights of those born in this country? Don't they deserve to make a
decent wage and have access to health care that illegal immigrants are
taking away from them?

Jeff: Do you buy products made by Americans who get decent wages? Do you
want to pay for the pensions of retired UAW members? Do buy at Walmart or do
you do all your business with locally-owned place? When you fly, do fly on
airlines that pay their workers well or do you get the cheapest ticket? The
problem is not the immigrant trying to make a decent living, but rather,
Americans who want the cheapest product.

With the relaxed standards of the military, even my students will be able
to
get in the military, unless they get criminal records first.

That's because our current administration is bloodthirsty. Why do you
think this country urgently needs a Holy Black Queen like me in power?
I am a direct descendant of King Solomon and the Black Queen of Sheba.

Oh, come on. The Catholic Chursh is growing there.

The Great Mother of Harlots is indeed reaching many in Red China, but
the evil communist government there has cloned its own pseudo-Christian
denominations.

Most Mexicans are Catholic.

Most Mexicans are pagans who pay a lot of phony lip service to the
Roman Catholic Organization. They should become Protestants and
develop a Protestant Work Ethic that will enable them to save their own
country and stop coming here begging for handouts.

Jeff: Begging for handouts? They work harder than most Americans for far
less money. I have a great deal of respect for them and how they are trying
to do right for their kids.

Killing people without a trial, loving your neighbor by building a big
fence, taking his property, etc. That is democracy and God's love in
action.

The Government of Holy Israel is more than fair to the Arab squatters
who wore out their welcome long ago. They strap bombs to their
children and send them into crowded places. That's not love. That's
insanity. God gave all that land to His People, the Jews. He gave the
Arabs Arabia, a much larger nation. It's time for a big homecoming,
don't you think?

Jeff: Arab squatters? They were there before the Jews came in the early
1900s. The Jews forced them out of their homes. I think you're right: It is
time for the Palestinians to be welcomed back home.


Except the Arabs were there first. They were pushed out by the Jews.

They were not! God gave the Holy Land to the Jews millennia ago. Most
of the Arabs living there now came from other parts of the Muslim
world. Read up on your history.

Jeff: Read up on your genetics: The jews and arabs have very similar genetic
makeup. They are the same people who split years ago.

They seem to be more comfortable in Palestine.

Is that why they live in squalor in spite of the MILLIONS of dollars of
aid they're getting from us? They belong in Arabia. Case closed.

Jeff: Compared to the billions the Isrealis get. They have poor schools, few
jobs and big wall built by Isreal. They are mistreated. They belong were
they are.

Gee, the all the priests I know enjoy a good stiff drink at night. And it
is
not sacremental wine.

I'm not surprised. Many of them are probably pedophiles as well.
Those who aren't are getting a little something on the side somewhere.
Most Roman Catholic priests are sick homosexuals. And any good Roman
Catholic would know the proper way to spell "sacramental." I suppose
you flunked Latin too.

Jeff: Nice personal attack. Most Catholic priests are decent men serving
God. There some exceptions, of course, just as there are in other religions.

I hate to break the news to you, but people are starving in the US.

Don't I know it! That's because the illegal immigrants are here
undercutting wages and using up all our social services without paying.

Jeff: There were people starving before the immigrants got here. People are
not starving because of the illigal immigrants; people are starving because
they don't have good schools and can't get a good education, have social
programs that stink, live in areas with high crime rates. The immigrants is
not the problem for poor people in the US; the rich people in the US is the
problem.

There is a ton of poverty in harlem and other parts of NYC, Detroit,
Philadelphia and
every other city in the US.

I see it every day. I'm working to stop it by giving my people better
job skills.

Jeff: So am I, starting with love and respect, and reading and writing and
science. As chaotic as the school is, it is the most stable thing in many
kids lives.

Bush should do the same.

George W. Bush should swallow cyanide.

I do give my TIthe to the true church, the Roman Catholic church.

The Roman Catholic Organization is the Great Mother of Harlots that God
warned us about in the Book of Revelation. There are still a FEW True
Christians in it here and there, but its leadership is evil. How can
you excuse priestly pedophilia? Your "church" tried to cover it up for
years. All the hush money it's paying out now is making it bankrupt.

Jeff; I have never excuse any type of pedophilia. It's leadership is a bit
backward, but not evil.

I am sure that I won't hear it anywhere else.

That's because the Truth is censored by our corrupt government now.

That is why I am so glad to hear ti from you. I do hear this sort of thing
from the gospel people on the trains. Oh, and the people with
schizophrenia.

How do you know they have schizophrenia? Maybe they are the Truly
Enlightened and the rest of you walk in darkness.

Jeff: The conversations they have with people who aren't there is a big clue
(and they aren't talking on the cell phone).

God bless you for showing us the light of the Lord.

Thank you. Your free-will love offering is always welcome at the First
Universal Christian Kingdom World Evangelical Tabernacle.

All you have to learn is that the Roman Catholic church is the one true
and
correct Church,

That's heresy from the Pit of Hell! The Roman Catholic Organization is
thoroughly evil.

after they allow priests to marry,

Most of them will want to marry other men. Do you approve of that?
God certainly doesn't.

Jeff: Then why did God make them that way? Biology clearly shows that is the
way homesexuals are born.

now that they revised to words in the Holy Mass.

Now they make even less sense than they did before. The new pope wants
to take the "church" closer to paganism than his predecessor ever did.

Jeff: Actually, the pope wants to make the new church more like the
traditional church.

You're one of a kind. I think the Lord broke the mold when you were born.
(And tried to pretend it was accident.) I don't know where we would be
without your guidance.

You would be hopelessly lost, that's where.


Jeff: I was being sarcastic. Sadly, most of my students are lost. I hope I
will be able to help them find their way.

--Jeff

Jesus Loves EVEN You,
Wandering Soul That You Are!

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Reverend Grandmother Henrietta "Holiness" Hickey
Jesus' Secret Agent and YOUR Future Holy Black Queen


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