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Old August 27th 07, 05:57 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
Paula
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Posts: 14
Default troublesome teenager

On Wed, 15 Aug 2007 08:26:55 EDT, "louise.ann.johnson"
wrote:

Hello. I am new to this group but looking at some of the posts I hope
someone may be able to help. I am struggling with knowing what to do
in a situation that is difficult. My 14 year old son is taking more
and more of an interest in women's clothes, even mine. I have always
let him play with the toys that he wanted and never forced boys toys
on him if be was not interested. He has boy and girl friends at school
but no regular girfriend. I buy him the clothes he wants or else he
will not wear them. Recently he has gone `emo' and taken to wearing
clothes that he says he likes even if they do not go together. It
started with colourful socks, pink and yellow and blue, and now floral
shirts. He is showing a definite liking for more and more feminie wear
and jokingly asked at the weekend if I could buy some girls pants for
him. I think he has been rummaging in my clothes drawers too as I have
noticed some things out of place. I have always been open minded with
him and allowed him to be himself but I don't want him to be teased or
bullied. I see little harm either if this is just a phase he is going
through. Has anyone any ideas as I am so unsure about what to do. I
have tried to talk with him but he clams up. Louise


Colorful socks don't sound very emo. In any event, if you are have no
problem personally with his wanting to wear feminine clothes but are
only worried about him being teased or bulllied, why not buy him the
stuff that he wants but have a talk with him about how kids at school
might react to it and ask if he wants to get more mainstream clothes
for school while allowing him to wear whatever he wants at home. In
the end, even if he wants to wear them at school, it seems to me that
it should be his choice. You want to protect him, but if he chooses
support ahead of protection, give him the support. If you have other
concerns, like that he might have gender identity issues and you don't
know how you feel about that or how to handle it, get professional
help. Those are complex issues to deal with in our society and both
you and your son, and other family members, no doubt, will benefit
from all the support you can get in dealing with it.

--
Paula
"Anyway, other people are weird, but sometimes they have candy,
so it's best to try to get along with them." Joe Bay