Hello Marion, thank you for your advice. When I say that I am an
'attachment parent' I tend to use the term as a catch all for my belief
system regarding parenting. I don't follow everything to the letter, and I
try my best to do my best for my son. But when I get too exhausted, that's
when I let go of those ideals. I don't feel guilty except when I have to
put him down and let him cry. In my opinion, that is when a baby should be
held is when he is crying. Up until a certain age anyway. Because at this
age, that's all they can do to communicate. However, there is only so much
one can do. I co-sleep with my baby and feel great about it. I sleep very
well, hardly even waking when he wants to be fed. We usually get a good 7-8
hours of sleep a night before he wakes up to be changed and talk to us.
Anyway, I appreciate hearing your experience, thank you for sharing ideas
with me.
Alicia


Absolutely- my daughter now 15 was colicky and cryed herself to sleep
pretty much every time for the first year of her life. I used to use a
kitchen timer and set it for 15 minutes and put her down and then go get
something to eat, jump in the shower, etc. For those who criticize, I
say it's better than throwing her against the wall, which is what would
have happened. As she got older, she would cry furiously for shorter
and shorter periods of time- maybe even 30 seconds and then "clunk" but
she almost always cried when put down and very, very seldom was I able
to nurse her or rock her to sleep. Some babies cry when tired or
overstimulated.

I was not a big attachment parenting fan- I saw too many exhausted
mothers who felt guilty no matter what they did. I breast fed my
children and used a sling- but I got much better sleep with my kids in a
crib with another room.

Be sure you are not doing to much at home and if you have a partner that
he is giving you a break. Even if you are nursing he can give the baby a
bath, take him for a walk. etc. With my second, I expressed milk for one
bottle a week and had my husband give it the first waking after 11:00 pm
on Fridays. Just getting one 6 hours stretch of sleep a week made a big
difference.


Marion Baumgarten