Welches wrote:
I'm coming from the view of #1, who sits still, listens and obeys (at school
anyway!!) and is at the top end of her form. Her teacher commented that she
"coasts" the academic side, and still is at the top. Certainly she produces
much better work at home than she does at school.

At various times she has commented that you get more rewards at school by
being "not bad" than being always good. It's been comment before but I'm
beginning to sense a frustration, as often these other children are getting
rewards frequently that she would like to have occasionally.

We had this at playgroup with my youngest (the others went to a
different playgroup, where almost all children got a sticker every day.)
We got round it by addressing a specific difficulty she had, and giving
her stickers for that.

Having observed at various times the 3-4 children in her form that are least
able to concentrate seem to get more than half the visible rewards going at
any time, this does seem to be disproportionate, but I can sympathise with
the teachers who have to keep them going. The school is very
non-competative, and don't seem to reward achievement either academically,
sporting, or other although they're good at recognising effort. I like the
awarding for effort, but sometimes #1 is confused by this and thinks she
must have done something badly because others got commended and she didn't
or thinks she must be really good at something that she isn't, but gets
rewarded because she tries.

The difficulty with not rewarding academic results is that doing well
academically is not necessarily obvious to the child. Sporting
achievements are obvious, because you can see the other kids doing
stuff, but you don't necessarily see that another child is getting
crosses against most (or some!) of their maths answers .

[snip]
I'm wondering how other schools deal with this problem, as I can't think of
a realisitc way round this where all are going to be motivated and feel
rewarded. The ones who really seem to miss out from my observation are those
who are quiet, obedient, and middle of the class in achievements, they seem
to get very, very few rewards at all.

Our primary school is also non-competative (actually we have a new head
who might be about to change things).

They have two different mechanisms. The first is housepoints: if you do
something well, you get a housepoint, and at the end of the term these
are added up and the house cup is awarded. When a specific child gets
a certain number of points (I think its 10), they get a certificate in
assembly.

The other method is star of the week, awarded by the headteacher. These
seem to be fair: or at least, my children have been getting them about
once a term, which is what you'd expect if they were evenly distributed.
Maybe one other child is getting it whenever they don't.

I'm not quite sure what you can do as a parent, except possibly bring it
to the teacher's notice. I suppose you could bring it up with the
governors (for non-UK posters, these could be thought of as the school
board), but it would need to be changed from within the school.

Anyway, you have my sympathies, but beyond changing school, I'm not
quite sure what you could do about it.
--
Penny Gaines
UK mum to three