Sue wrote:
"Jo" wrote in message

I do tend more towards the AP method - I just have this gut feeling that
you *should* pander to a baby's needs before they are old enough to
reason with.


Okay this is my goat with the AP school of thought. Your baby *needs* to
sleep. You are meeting his *need* by helping him to get himself to sleep and
before he gets too overstimulated. Crying is not a bad thing, sometimes it
is okay for them to cry, not a distressed cry and hence the child feeling
abandoned, but if the child cries to let off some steam and you let him do
it, you are meeting his need. This thought of never letting a baby cry is
crazy. That's what babies do to let you know they need you. If you meet his
need to get himself organized to sleep, then you are meeting his need.

rant off

Yes, that makes sense too... I just think the level of crying is the
deciding factor in all of this. If his crying is levelling off or
calming down with me leaving, then fine, he can cry/whinge himself to
sleep....but if it's worse when I leave - that's a sign that he won't
sleep easily, and that he needs me. Or thinks he needs me - there is no
difference with a little baby.

I know it is unrealistic for him never to cry - it's his only
communication that he's not happy, his only protest. They are
programmed to cry to get something done about the situation they're in.
It's just so damned hard to hear though!

Jo