A couple wanted to join the church. The pastor told them, "We have a special
requirement for new member couples. You must abstain from sex for one whole
month."

The couple agreed and after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the church.
When the Pastor ushered them into his office, the wife was crying and the
husband was obviously very depressed.

"You are back so soon... Is there a problem?", the pastor inquired.

"We are terribly ashamed to admit that we did not manage to abstain from sex
for the required month." the young man replied sadly.

The pastor asked him what happened.

"Well, the first week was difficult...however, we managed to abstain through
sheer willpower." "The second week was terrible, but with the use of prayer,
we managed to abstain.

"However, the third week was unbearable. We tried cold showers, prayer,
reading from the Bible...anything to keep our minds off carnal thoughts.

"One afternoon, my wife reached for a can of paint and dropped it. When she
bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and I just had my way with
her right then and there. It was lustful, loud, passionate sex. It lasted
for over half an hour, and when we were done we were both drenched in
sweat." admitted the man, shamefacedly.

The pastor lowered his head and said sternly, "You understand this means you
will not be welcome in our church."

"We know", said the young man, hanging his head, "We're not welcome at Home
Depot either."