"Dagny" wrote in message
link.net...


--
-------------------------------------------------
A woman becomes preeminent, she is expected to have enthusiasms.
"Kereru" wrote in message
...

"Dagny" wrote in message
link.net...

"Nikki" wrote in message
...
Dagny wrote:

Bad backs are a reason to use strollers, and cold weather and not
disturbing a nap are reasons to leave the child in the carseat
and/or
snap the child in a travel system.

I'm not being defensive as I was one of those mothers that held
mine.
I
didn't even own an infant seat for Hunter and didn't have one for
Luke
until
he was 3 months old. My stroller never left my property. I just
carried
them around in my arms, didn't even have a sling.

Still I really don't understand what the problem is with sitting a
content
and happy baby down in a seat of some kind while mom does her
shopping.
Why
is *just because it is easier* not an acceptable reason if everyone
is
happy and content.

I never said anything about wanting people to work for no reason.
There's
a
fine line between "happy and content" and "brain dead, unstimulated,
has
learned that he can't look to mom for input about the world because
mom
is
forever out of view behind a stroller, big flat spot on the back of
her
head."



A fine line! You have a very bleak view of the world, I feel sorry for
you.



I'm bitter right now about some other things and it spills into all areas
of
my life, but yes I do have a very bleak view of many artificial methods of
Western parenting. But you know, thanks for the extra condescension

Well considering the ridiculous sweeping statement you made you are lucky
condescension is all you got.


It's a fine line because it gets to the point in my opinion where the
CHILD
doesn't know the difference between good and bad contentedness, between
happy engaged and happy zoned out, how would the parent? How would the
parent even know what their child was capable of?



-- Dagny





I just don't think it works that way. Sure you leave kids alone in a
Romanian orphanage they don't develop normally. Having kids in a carseat or
stroller, swing or bouncy chair isn't going to turn them into zombies, it's
a totally different thing. What is important is talking, singing cuddling
and playing with kids not how you get them from A to B. I hardly carry my
boys at all they are large and both seem to prefer being slightly away from
me where they can see me.

I think you have a pretty naive view of what life is like in these
"non-western" countries that you talk about. I imagine most people co-sleep
and baby-wear out of necessity not because they think it promotes optimal
child development. They do what works under the circumstances as we all do.

I don't want to get into an AP debate here. I have no problem with it. If it
works for you it works for you. But don't jump on those of us who do it
differently. I have two happy, affectionate, intellegent totally non-AP
raised kids and take offense to your comments.

So I will finish with the old cliche "live and let live", you're not the
only good parent in the "western" world.

Judy