"Lisa aka Surfer" wrote in message
...

"Paul Fritz" wrote in message
...

"Lisa aka Surfer" wrote in message
...

wrote in message
. net...
Cele wrote:
I don't think you can expect much from 'the system'.

What? Oh, Nooooo!

I'm screwed. LOL.

Whatever's gone wrong before is over, it's written, it's
done. You can't affect it. Walk away from it. Work on the now.
It's
all you can do. For him and for yourself.

And be well.

What is it with people who can not see that history repeats itself
unless
you actively seek to stop the cycles? I've been in therapy so much
that
it
is just so clear to me that my son saw me be abused as a child so
that
is
what was role modeled for him and now he is acting that out as he
becomes
a
man. Also, he is reacting to me as I only know how to live with a
man
from
a victim's stand point, I have lots of male friends that I keep at a
distance but living with one is a different story. You can't just
"let
it
go" or "forget about it" or "put it in the past" abuse isn't like
that.
History isn't like that. Time isn't like that. If only it were
that
simple. But it isn't, it is very convoluted. The rest of your post
was
right on, depressing though, as I was really hoping "the system" was
going
to save us. damn.



Lorian,,,,,try re-reading Cele's post. My thought was,,,,if ever
there
was
a post this girl needs to keep it's this one.

You really really need to move along to doing something proactive to
make
things right in your family's life. What other people know,
understand,
think means **** all. It's perception. Stop wallowing and start
parenting
your kid before he finds himself in more trouble than stealing your
car
and
quitting school.

No one is going to do it for you.

The problem is that the 'therapy' has obviously been an enabling tool
for
her as well.
It is absolute BS that the witnessed 'abuse' is the cause. rather it
is
living in a misandrist household with a nutcase for a mother. The kid
is
trying to escape, through drugs, booze, and whatever.



Lisa


Talk talk talk. My father is of the old school that talk therapy is the
key
to managing mental illness. From my perspective the only way it does any
good is with someone that will simply tell you....."face it, this is how
it
is"

This young lad is 16,,,if anything is to change it better be now,
otherwise
he's going to be in for a some crappy years. Lorian is enabling him now.
Hmmmmm, now here's a thought.....Is failing to parent your child abusive?

Lisa


Yes.

She's creating a male version of herself, except this kid will end up hating
everyone, not just men.

Somehow, she thinks the current abuse she lays on her kid is magic and comes
from no where