In article ,
Chris says...



Sit in an empty Red Rocks amphitheater with a group of close friends, play=
ing in
flashlights shone onto the rocks, then wait for the sun to come up?

Naw...erase that.

Return two and a half hours' drive from a ski trip, after a late dinner wi=
th a
friend's family. =EF=BF=BDWith the 22 year old big sister of said friend a=
t the wheel?

Naw...erase that.

Guess what Banty - even parents that set curfews would be 99% prone to
extending them here and there and for the type of controlled examples
you cite -- mine did. If I didn't have a planned activity, then curfew
was as it was. Your last question reveals a lot more about you than
you know. Yes, Beliavsky, you are correct -- it was meant to reveal
that I did still have a curfew despite being what most referred to as
a "model" teenager "good" girl.

The first example was not "controlled". ("Say Dad, can me and Grant and Margot
run around the environs of Denver all night, just seeing what turns up?") The
second case, perhaps, but what a curfew meant, when it did limit me, was mostly
stuff like - a friend of mine are having a heart to heart, but that didn't
really start until another mutual friend left at 10:15, and it's an 11:00 curfew
for me, and I have to leave at 10:45, so the heart to heart gets cut short.
Stuff along that line. And, yes, a lot of local concerts and stuff that I
couldn't make it back from in time so I didn't go. (Multiple continuous
exceptions don't a curfew make, so they weren't made.) More reasons to mark off
the calendar until I could be gone for good. Not the best start to a good adult
relationship with my family of origin.

This is why a lot of young adults go hogwild the freshmen year of college.
There's a heck of a lot of deferred exploration and self-discovery. And just
plain fun.

Eighteen year old fight wars for us, Chris. Only a couple of generations past
eighteen year olds were commonly married and raising families. Or at the least
already taking on trades and embarking in other ways.

It's our nutty society that takes young adults and expects them to be
quasi-babies well past adolescence. And throws up its hands when it sees stupid
decisions made by 18 year olds, and decides to pull the reins even tighter.

Banty