Moon Shyne wrote:

"Secret Asian Man" wrote in message
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Moon Shyne wrote:


"Tiffany" wrote in message
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"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
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"Chris" wrote in message
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"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...


Nothing seems to be changing, and I am at a point where I have to
make a
decision. Either I continue to say nothing and let her weave enough

rope


to hang herself with (the plan here would be to go to court in a year
or
so and demand full custody), or I start stepping on her heels to get
rid
of the cat, wash the carpet, and shoulder some responsibility in
raising
our child.

Why on earth would you think you have the right to get rid of her cat,
or
make changes in her home? Would you allow her to get rid of YOUR pet,
and
make changes in YOUR home?

He never claimed such right.

Of course - he only stated he was thinking about doing those things.
Got it.



Here is what he said:

I spoke with her and
luckily she agreed that her place was not fit for a small child to sleep
in. She said she knew the problem was one of her cats that keeps peeing
on everything, and that she didn't want to clean the carpet until she
got rid of the cat at a "no-kill shelter" she'd heard of.

She admits to having an unfit home but can't seem to do anything about
it. She is probably severely depressed and one can only wonder at what
other neglect is happening.

Though I don't agree that the father should call Child Protection YET, he
should be documenting everything, pics and all.

A parent has every right to request changes if a living situation is
harmful.


He also said:

or I start stepping on her heels to
get rid of the cat, wash the carpet, and shoulder some responsibility in
raising our child.

Yes. We had an agreement on what would happen before our son slept at her
place. SHE agreed without any coersion on my part. I never threatened to
call CPS on her.

Now my choices a

1. Call CPS and/or sue for full custody now
2. Release her from our agreement and ask her to take our son half of the
time again
3. Step on her heels about getting rid of the cat and washing the carpet

This woman is depressive and doesn't do much unless someone is prodding
her to do it.


And you think it's YOUR place to do it? What are you, some sort of control
freak? She's your ex - let her run her own life.

I am in no way a control freak, but I got very tired of living with the
consequences of her (in)actions. You're absolutely right, she's my ex,
and I let her run her own life, poor decisions and all. I don't even
comment on them. But I have to intervene when my son's well-being is at
risk.

Presumably you have an ex or you wouldn't be here. If they were, say,
living in a crackhouse, would you honestly say nothing about it? Would
you just "let him run his own life" or would you tell him your child
wasn't going to be staying over until he cleaned up his act?


She's like a big kid. I got tired of prodding her all of

the time and being painted as the "bad guy" because of it. This is one
reason our marriage didn't work out.


Because you nagged her all the time? Big surprise there.

You're a loon and I'm not going to argue with you.

Secret Asian Man!