T Flynn wrote:

On Thu, 29 Jul 2004, Sophie wrote:

If it were me, I'd have them close in age if there'll only be 2 of them.


I just think about my dad and his brothers -- Grandma had three boys in
just over four years -- and the silly arguments and games they played. By
the mid 1960s, they lived thousands of miles apart, and rarely got
together after that. But then, hey, that's them. OTOH, their mom was the
youngest of like 10 born over about 18 years.

I don't think there's any spacing that even comes
close to guaranteeing your kids will get along. Every
spacing has plusses and minuses in that department.
Have kids close together and some will play well together
because they're at similar stages developmentally.
Others will fight like cats and dogs because they're
in constant competition. Have them far apart and
sometimes they'll develop a really intense bond that's
almost a little parental. On the other hand, sometimes
they'll have no interest in each other. It's the
same with spacings in the middle. You just don't know.
It depends on the temperaments of the kids, the family
dynamics, and even (in my opinion) the gender mix.
I think about the only thing that you can
figure is that if you have kids within a few years
of each other (and stop at two), you will likely
spend most of your family life in a situation where
your kids won't be a very different developmental
stages. That makes it a bit easier to find suitable
family activities. On the other hand, you could get
kids who have very different temperaments and interests,
in which case being at about the same developmental
stage won't do you a bit of good ;-)
I think you just have to have however many
kids you really want at whatever time you really want
to do it. Feeling ready and being enthusiastic about
parenting another child beats just about any other
criteria.

Best wishes,
Ericka