When I was first pg, I really didn't want to breastfeed tbh. There was a
hole lot of reasons, and I just wasn't into the idea. I bought bottles,
sterilisers etc, but no formula as I wanted to wait til nearer the birth.
Then, when I turned 6 months pg, my milk arrived, which freaked me out, as
I really didn't expect it to. However, once I got over the shock, I
decided my body obviously knew what it was doing and I would give
breastfeeding a try, and when DD was born, that's exactly what I did. I'm
glad I was never determined though, as (partly thanks to the midwife at
the hospital who told me not to let Jessica snack, and that she must have
set feed times from birth!) the first few weeks were so tough and I had to
express and eventually supplement. Had I been determined, I would have
felt a total failure, which the community midwife tried to make me feel
like the next day anyway.

One could argue, however, that had you been committed, you would have either
been educated, or followed your instincts, and fed the baby on demand,
having set feed times from birth has been off the cards for quite a long
time now and all the free stuff that gets dumped on you in the UK all say
feed the baby on demand. Had you made the decision that you were nursing no
matter what, that first bottle may never have happened, I had problems with
my first, he had a weak suck and my supply dropped, I would often nurse him
for 2hrs, switching side every 15 minutes. In some ways for me committing to
breastfeed was really committing not to give formula, so if baby was hungry
it was me he was having, my suspicion is that had you been determined you
would have been a success and that is exactly what you are, you've been
determined to go back to breastfeeding exclusively and you have!

Anne