M.E. Mitchell wrote:

I tell my kids "that's life". You can't always get your way or have
everything you want. There are things I would rather have or be doing, but
in life there are responsibilities and limits.
-----------------------------
That's a bad philosophy. Kids should be told they CAN and SHOULD
obtain their dream, just not from you, or not from abuse of others.
Dreams are supposed to come true.
Steve


"Calla" wrote in message
om...
I just wanted to share that I have started purposely being empathetic
with my daughter (5yo) every time she gets upset or angry. The
upset/anger is often caused by my not letting her do something she
wants to do, or asking her do something she doesn't want to do. In
those situations, it is a complete turnaround for me to behave
empathetically in response to her anger or crying. I did not know
that was something I should do. By empathy, I mean that I have been
saying things like, "I'm so sorry", "I can see you are really angry",
"I can see that really hurts", "this is sad," etc. I have been so
surprised at her response. She is genuinely comforted by those words.
The empathy diffuses her anger/crying and eventualy she asks me to
tell her a joke to make her feel better.

I got to this 'empathy' idea from hearing about "Love and Logic" and
reading all of the materials posted on

http://www.loveandlogic.com/Pages/0400articles.html

I don't think "Love and Logic" is the be-all end-all parenting
technique, but just using a few of their ideas has given me some great
tools and shown me the power of empathy.

Can someone recommend a book or two on empathetic parenting & handling
behavior problems w/empathy? I probably will get one book on "Love
and Logic," but I'd like to see some other sources on this topic as
well.