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#21
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Hi Chris. I don't co-sleep with my babies either, once they're old
enough to stay awake longer during the day and sleep longer at night. Both of my babies objected to their sleep being disturbed by our noise. Pologirl |
#22
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
On Apr 23, 5:35�pm, Pologirl wrote:
Hi Chris. �I don't co-sleep with my babies either, once they're old enough to stay awake longer during the day and sleep longer at night. Both of my babies objected to their sleep being disturbed by our noise. Pologirl Hi. I did share a room, but not a bed with my last 1 for quite a while during the first year while we converted a family room into a 4th master bedroom for us. He was in a crib and we were in our bed. I did love being greeted with those smiling eyes, nose, and big ol' bald head over the bumper pad every day, but I will never miss a finger in my nose, eyes, or ears all night long. LMAO. |
#23
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Don't feed the troll.
Pologirl |
#24
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE" if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! And specifically I was thinking back to a time when my toddler had to have staples in his head for a head injury, and the best tool that **I** had in **my** toolbox for keeping him calm was sticking a breast in his mouth. I was very careful NOT to say that another mother wouldn't be able to calm her own little guy with whatever tools SHE was used to using. I was only making a statement about myself and my own life experience. If you find my own reliance on such a tool, and my own lack of an alternative skill (if I were to lose my breasts tomorrow), somehow "arrogant" and "hurtful" to you, then it seems you are looking for insult and I'm afraid I will not succeed in having a conversation with you. And neither will Ed. Suzanne. Ericka Kammerer wrote: Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote: Anyway, I have seen families that are loving who for whatever reason, scheduling conflicts, breast problems, mother-self-image, bad advice by "doctors", did not breastfeed. But personally, I would not have a clue how to relate to a baby of mine if I could not nurse away all the infantile boo boo's a small child encounters in life. So please cut Ed some slack, as I'm sure his opinions are colored by my own, and I promise to teach him how to use emoticons, so you can know his mood while he's writing ;-) Sure, everyone can be misunderstood, but honestly, I don't see how an emoticon can soften the blow of the things he said in his original post. If anyone called out any of the parenting practices you've used and called them the things he called parents who don't breastfeed or co-sleep, you'd be up in arms. Even you just said above that you don't see how mothers relate to their kids without breastfeeding! Do you truly mean to imply that moms who don't breastfeed can't relate to their kids? Or at least can't relate to them in the special way you relate to your kids? I'm sorry, but that's just plain arrogant and hurtful. Mothers who didn't breastfeed for whatever reasons still manage to love and nurture and relate to their babies, and it's insulting to imply otherwise, whether you stick a smiley on the end or not. I'm glad I breastfed my babies, but I would never in a million years look down that way on women who didn't. You won't find a stronger proponent of homebirth either, but I don't go around telling folks that if they didn't give birth at home without any drugs or interventions, I couldn't possibly imagine how they bonded properly with their babies. Best wishes, Ericka |
#25
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE" if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! And specifically I was thinking back to a time when my toddler had to have staples in his head for a head injury, and the best tool that **I** had in **my** toolbox for keeping him calm was sticking a breast in his mouth. I was very careful NOT to say that another mother wouldn't be able to calm her own little guy with whatever tools SHE was used to using. I was only making a statement about myself and my own life experience. If you find my own reliance on such a tool, and my own lack of an alternative skill (if I were to lose my breasts tomorrow), somehow "arrogant" and "hurtful" to you, then it seems you are looking for insult and I'm afraid I will not succeed in having a conversation with you. And neither will Ed. Suzanne. Ericka Kammerer wrote: Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote: Anyway, I have seen families that are loving who for whatever reason, scheduling conflicts, breast problems, mother-self-image, bad advice by "doctors", did not breastfeed. But personally, I would not have a clue how to relate to a baby of mine if I could not nurse away all the infantile boo boo's a small child encounters in life. So please cut Ed some slack, as I'm sure his opinions are colored by my own, and I promise to teach him how to use emoticons, so you can know his mood while he's writing ;-) Sure, everyone can be misunderstood, but honestly, I don't see how an emoticon can soften the blow of the things he said in his original post. If anyone called out any of the parenting practices you've used and called them the things he called parents who don't breastfeed or co-sleep, you'd be up in arms. Even you just said above that you don't see how mothers relate to their kids without breastfeeding! Do you truly mean to imply that moms who don't breastfeed can't relate to their kids? Or at least can't relate to them in the special way you relate to your kids? I'm sorry, but that's just plain arrogant and hurtful. Mothers who didn't breastfeed for whatever reasons still manage to love and nurture and relate to their babies, and it's insulting to imply otherwise, whether you stick a smiley on the end or not. I'm glad I breastfed my babies, but I would never in a million years look down that way on women who didn't. You won't find a stronger proponent of homebirth either, but I don't go around telling folks that if they didn't give birth at home without any drugs or interventions, I couldn't possibly imagine how they bonded properly with their babies. Best wishes, Ericka |
#26
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote:
Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE" if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! But this is a newsgroup full of pregnant women and parents. Some statements are just too touchy to be said, especially those that invite comparisons such as yours. If I said, "I don't know how I could have bonded with my baby if I'd had drugs during labor" I guarantee you that most perfectly normal people will see that as a back-handed indictment of women who choose drugs. Folks who hang around for a bit to get the lay of the land realize quite quickly that these sorts of statements are quite volatile, even when well intentioned. If you aren't interested in figuring out how to have a conversation in this group without provoking people, that's fine. It was just an attempt to explain why you and Ed aren't receiving the warmest reception ever. Best wishes, Ericka |
#27
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Hi Erika,
I don't think Suzanne's comment was too touchy to be said. I would rather err on the side of tolerance and accept and allow touchy comments. I feel sad for Suzanne; nursing a baby is only one of many ways of bonding and care giving, yet Suzanne knows only that one way. I hope she finds help. Perhaps she will find it here. Pologirl |
#28
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Pologirl wrote:
Hi Erika, I don't think Suzanne's comment was too touchy to be said. I would rather err on the side of tolerance and accept and allow touchy comments. People say them and have said them in the past and will likely continue to say them in the future. Nevertheless, they invariably cause some people's feelings to be hurt, and they tend to generate negative responses. Having observed this, one has a choice: continue to say such things and hurt feelings and receive negative responses, or find a different way to express one's self. Best wishes, Ericka |
#29
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
Ericka Kammerer wrote:
Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote: Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE" if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! But this is a newsgroup full of pregnant women and parents. Some statements are just too touchy to be said, especially those that invite comparisons such as yours. If I said, "I don't know how I could have bonded with my baby if I'd had drugs during labor" I guarantee you that most perfectly normal people will see that as a back-handed indictment of women who choose drugs. Folks who hang around for a bit to get the lay of the land realize quite quickly that these sorts of statements are quite volatile, even when well intentioned. If you aren't interested in figuring out how to have a conversation in this group without provoking people, that's fine. It was just an attempt to explain why you and Ed aren't receiving the warmest reception ever. Best wishes, Ericka Really. Since I only said I breastfed my own children when they were babies, and nothing about non-breastfeeding mothers, perhaps it is only YOU who is too emotionally delicate. It's really not fair of you to lay that trip on other people around here. If you prefer to surround yourself with your own definition of ultra politically correct speech, perhaps you can start your own moderated newsgroup. Suzanne. |
#30
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baby in separate room from mother at night?
"Suzanne at SuzCorner" wrote in message
m... Ericka Kammerer wrote: Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote: Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE" if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! But this is a newsgroup full of pregnant women and parents. Some statements are just too touchy to be said, especially those that invite comparisons such as yours. If I said, "I don't know how I could have bonded with my baby if I'd had drugs during labor" I guarantee you that most perfectly normal people will see that as a back-handed indictment of women who choose drugs. Folks who hang around for a bit to get the lay of the land realize quite quickly that these sorts of statements are quite volatile, even when well intentioned. If you aren't interested in figuring out how to have a conversation in this group without provoking people, that's fine. It was just an attempt to explain why you and Ed aren't receiving the warmest reception ever. Best wishes, Ericka Really. Since I only said I breastfed my own children when they were babies, and nothing about non-breastfeeding mothers, perhaps it is only YOU who is too emotionally delicate. It's really not fair of you to lay that trip on other people around here. If you prefer to surround yourself with your own definition of ultra politically correct speech, perhaps you can start your own moderated newsgroup. Suzanne. While I wasn't offended at your comment, I read it as Ericka did, and actually felt very sad for you, that you didn't feel like you could love/bond/relate/whatever to a baby unless you were able to shove your boob in it's mouth. There are lots of other ways to relate to your infants, and I bet you do lots of them. -- Jamie Clark |
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