A Parenting & kids forum. ParentingBanter.com

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » ParentingBanter.com forum » misc.kids » Pregnancy
Site Map Home Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

baby in separate room from mother at night?



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #21  
Old April 23rd 08, 10:35 PM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Pologirl
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 342
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Hi Chris. I don't co-sleep with my babies either, once they're old
enough to stay awake longer during the day and sleep longer at night.
Both of my babies objected to their sleep being disturbed by our
noise.

Pologirl
  #22  
Old April 24th 08, 01:41 AM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Chris
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 223
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

On Apr 23, 5:35�pm, Pologirl wrote:
Hi Chris. �I don't co-sleep with my babies either, once they're old
enough to stay awake longer during the day and sleep longer at night.
Both of my babies objected to their sleep being disturbed by our
noise.

Pologirl


Hi. I did share a room, but not a bed with my last 1 for quite a while
during the first year while we converted a family room into a 4th
master bedroom for us. He was in a crib and we were in our bed. I did
love being greeted with those smiling eyes, nose, and big ol' bald
head over the bumper pad every day, but I will never miss a finger in
my nose, eyes, or ears all night long. LMAO.
  #23  
Old April 24th 08, 05:16 AM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Pologirl
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 342
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Don't feed the troll.

Pologirl
  #24  
Old April 24th 08, 09:41 PM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Suzanne at SuzCorner
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 7
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say
that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE"
if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! And
specifically I was thinking back to a time when my toddler had to have
staples in his head for a head injury, and the best tool that **I** had
in **my** toolbox for keeping him calm was sticking a breast in his mouth.

I was very careful NOT to say that another mother wouldn't be able to
calm her own little guy with whatever tools SHE was used to using. I
was only making a statement about myself and my own life experience.

If you find my own reliance on such a tool, and my own lack of an
alternative skill (if I were to lose my breasts tomorrow), somehow
"arrogant" and "hurtful" to you, then it seems you are looking for
insult and I'm afraid I will not succeed in having a conversation with
you. And neither will Ed.

Suzanne.



Ericka Kammerer wrote:
Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote:

Anyway, I have seen families that are loving who for whatever
reason, scheduling conflicts, breast problems, mother-self-image, bad
advice by "doctors", did not breastfeed. But personally, I would not
have a clue how to relate to a baby of mine if I could not nurse away
all the infantile boo boo's a small child encounters in life. So
please cut Ed some slack, as I'm sure his opinions are colored by my
own, and I promise to teach him how to use emoticons, so you can know
his mood while he's writing ;-)


Sure, everyone can be misunderstood, but honestly, I don't
see how an emoticon can soften the blow of the things he said in
his original post. If anyone called out any of the parenting
practices you've used and called them the things he called parents
who don't breastfeed or co-sleep, you'd be up in arms. Even you
just said above that you don't see how mothers relate to their
kids without breastfeeding! Do you truly mean to imply that
moms who don't breastfeed can't relate to their kids? Or at
least can't relate to them in the special way you relate to your
kids? I'm sorry, but that's just plain arrogant and hurtful.
Mothers who didn't breastfeed for whatever reasons still manage
to love and nurture and relate to their babies, and it's insulting
to imply otherwise, whether you stick a smiley on the end or not.
I'm glad I breastfed my babies, but I would never in a million years
look down that way on women who didn't. You won't find a stronger
proponent of homebirth either, but I don't go around telling folks
that if they didn't give birth at home without any drugs or
interventions, I couldn't possibly imagine how they bonded properly
with their babies.

Best wishes,
Ericka

  #25  
Old April 24th 08, 09:48 PM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Suzanne at SuzCorner
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 7
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say
that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE"
if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't! And
specifically I was thinking back to a time when my toddler had to have
staples in his head for a head injury, and the best tool that **I** had
in **my** toolbox for keeping him calm was sticking a breast in his mouth.

I was very careful NOT to say that another mother wouldn't be able to
calm her own little guy with whatever tools SHE was used to using. I
was only making a statement about myself and my own life experience.

If you find my own reliance on such a tool, and my own lack of an
alternative skill (if I were to lose my breasts tomorrow), somehow
"arrogant" and "hurtful" to you, then it seems you are looking for
insult and I'm afraid I will not succeed in having a conversation with
you. And neither will Ed.

Suzanne.



Ericka Kammerer wrote:
Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote:

Anyway, I have seen families that are loving who for whatever
reason, scheduling conflicts, breast problems, mother-self-image, bad
advice by "doctors", did not breastfeed. But personally, I would not
have a clue how to relate to a baby of mine if I could not nurse away
all the infantile boo boo's a small child encounters in life. So
please cut Ed some slack, as I'm sure his opinions are colored by my
own, and I promise to teach him how to use emoticons, so you can know
his mood while he's writing ;-)


Sure, everyone can be misunderstood, but honestly, I don't
see how an emoticon can soften the blow of the things he said in
his original post. If anyone called out any of the parenting
practices you've used and called them the things he called parents
who don't breastfeed or co-sleep, you'd be up in arms. Even you
just said above that you don't see how mothers relate to their
kids without breastfeeding! Do you truly mean to imply that
moms who don't breastfeed can't relate to their kids? Or at
least can't relate to them in the special way you relate to your
kids? I'm sorry, but that's just plain arrogant and hurtful.
Mothers who didn't breastfeed for whatever reasons still manage
to love and nurture and relate to their babies, and it's insulting
to imply otherwise, whether you stick a smiley on the end or not.
I'm glad I breastfed my babies, but I would never in a million years
look down that way on women who didn't. You won't find a stronger
proponent of homebirth either, but I don't go around telling folks
that if they didn't give birth at home without any drugs or
interventions, I couldn't possibly imagine how they bonded properly
with their babies.

Best wishes,
Ericka

  #26  
Old April 24th 08, 10:02 PM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Ericka Kammerer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 2,293
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote:
Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say
that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE"
if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't!


But this is a newsgroup full of pregnant women and parents.
Some statements are just too touchy to be said, especially those
that invite comparisons such as yours. If I said, "I don't know
how I could have bonded with my baby if I'd had drugs during labor"
I guarantee you that most perfectly normal people will see that
as a back-handed indictment of women who choose drugs. Folks who
hang around for a bit to get the lay of the land realize quite
quickly that these sorts of statements are quite volatile, even
when well intentioned. If you aren't interested in figuring
out how to have a conversation in this group without provoking
people, that's fine. It was just an attempt to explain why
you and Ed aren't receiving the warmest reception ever.

Best wishes,
Ericka
  #27  
Old April 24th 08, 10:31 PM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Pologirl
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 342
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Hi Erika,

I don't think Suzanne's comment was too touchy to be said. I would
rather err on the side of tolerance and accept and allow touchy
comments.

I feel sad for Suzanne; nursing a baby is only one of many ways of
bonding and care giving, yet Suzanne knows only that one way. I hope
she finds help. Perhaps she will find it here.

Pologirl
  #28  
Old April 25th 08, 01:08 AM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Ericka Kammerer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 2,293
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Pologirl wrote:
Hi Erika,

I don't think Suzanne's comment was too touchy to be said. I would
rather err on the side of tolerance and accept and allow touchy
comments.


People say them and have said them in the past and will
likely continue to say them in the future. Nevertheless, they
invariably cause some people's feelings to be hurt, and they
tend to generate negative responses. Having observed this,
one has a choice: continue to say such things and hurt feelings
and receive negative responses, or find a different way to
express one's self.

Best wishes,
Ericka
  #29  
Old April 25th 08, 04:20 AM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Suzanne at SuzCorner
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 7
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

Ericka Kammerer wrote:
Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote:
Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say
that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE"
if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't!


But this is a newsgroup full of pregnant women and parents.
Some statements are just too touchy to be said, especially those
that invite comparisons such as yours. If I said, "I don't know
how I could have bonded with my baby if I'd had drugs during labor"
I guarantee you that most perfectly normal people will see that
as a back-handed indictment of women who choose drugs. Folks who
hang around for a bit to get the lay of the land realize quite
quickly that these sorts of statements are quite volatile, even
when well intentioned. If you aren't interested in figuring
out how to have a conversation in this group without provoking
people, that's fine. It was just an attempt to explain why
you and Ed aren't receiving the warmest reception ever.

Best wishes,
Ericka



Really. Since I only said I breastfed my own children when they were
babies, and nothing about non-breastfeeding mothers, perhaps it is only
YOU who is too emotionally delicate. It's really not fair of you to lay
that trip on other people around here. If you prefer to surround
yourself with your own definition of ultra politically correct speech,
perhaps you can start your own moderated newsgroup. Suzanne.



  #30  
Old April 25th 08, 04:51 AM posted to misc.kids.pregnancy
Jamie Clark
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 855
Default baby in separate room from mother at night?

"Suzanne at SuzCorner" wrote in message
m...
Ericka Kammerer wrote:
Suzanne at SuzCorner wrote:
Wow Ericka, I'm sorry to say you seem to have just proven your own
propensity to misread what somebody wrote! I was very careful to say
that *I* "PERSONALLY" would not know how to relate to a baby of "MINE"
if **I** could not breastfeed. That means that **I** wouldn't!


But this is a newsgroup full of pregnant women and parents.
Some statements are just too touchy to be said, especially those
that invite comparisons such as yours. If I said, "I don't know
how I could have bonded with my baby if I'd had drugs during labor"
I guarantee you that most perfectly normal people will see that
as a back-handed indictment of women who choose drugs. Folks who
hang around for a bit to get the lay of the land realize quite
quickly that these sorts of statements are quite volatile, even
when well intentioned. If you aren't interested in figuring
out how to have a conversation in this group without provoking
people, that's fine. It was just an attempt to explain why
you and Ed aren't receiving the warmest reception ever.

Best wishes,
Ericka



Really. Since I only said I breastfed my own children when they were
babies, and nothing about non-breastfeeding mothers, perhaps it is only
YOU who is too emotionally delicate. It's really not fair of you to lay
that trip on other people around here. If you prefer to surround yourself
with your own definition of ultra politically correct speech, perhaps you
can start your own moderated newsgroup. Suzanne.



While I wasn't offended at your comment, I read it as Ericka did, and
actually felt very sad for you, that you didn't feel like you could
love/bond/relate/whatever to a baby unless you were able to shove your boob
in it's mouth. There are lots of other ways to relate to your infants, and
I bet you do lots of them.
--

Jamie Clark


 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Mother lived lavishly while keeping her adopted children locked inside a utility room [email protected] General 0 August 11th 07 02:40 PM
6 month old's crib in parents' room causing night waking? [email protected] General 2 January 3rd 07 02:51 PM
Night light in nursling's room [email protected] General 20 February 11th 05 02:10 PM
infant/baby room monitor John Doe Pregnancy 0 January 27th 05 08:55 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 05:51 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 ParentingBanter.com.
The comments are property of their posters.