It's been a short 2 weeks

Note: This post was started on May 28th & I'm just being able to
finish it due to work commitments

Hi All.

Isn't the internet great !!!

It's good to be back, so on to my tale :-)

I also ( not too much recently ) post to another group, and we get
together fairly regularly, ( Called Boinks ) it's nothing to get
15-20 people together for a weekend of good food, Fun and company. 2
weeks ago 17 of us got together for a week on Folly Beach in S.C. (
Just outside Charleston) . Got a nice tan, and played in the water (
water was 75 degrees ) Watched some kewl southern storms. I didn't
cook, but did a lot of "clean-up" duties. It really is like an
extended family, several of them I have known for more than 10 yrs.

Anyway we left home Sat evening and went to DC, stayed the night, then
picked up a friend in Fairfax VA, and headed south. It was a fun 18
Hrs on the road. Since we couldn't get the house till Monday, we
stayed at a hotel, and we met up with another couple of our group that
evening and closed down a local Applebee's. That monday we did a
little shopping in Charleston in the Morning. I unloaded my
passengers and some baggage to the other couple and headed to the
airport to pick up other members of our group. Others rolled in
throughout the day.

We frolicked on the beach all week, along with a bit of shopping in
Charleston.

We left there on Noon on Sat. and headed home, as I had to be home
by noon on Sunday. The trip back was more relaxed. Dropped my friend
off in Fairfax at 11:30pm and made it as far as Harrisburg PA before I
called it a night at 1:30am. Left early the next morning and made it
home by 10am, and I was back on the road by 11am.

Some of you may remember that my son has a Drug & Alcohol addiction
problem. After violating parole and spending over 30 days in jail (
which he didn't like one bit ) , they sent him to a long term Rehab
center up north. We had to be there by 6pm or we wouldn't be able to
see him and participate in the family portion of his rehab, and it was
at least a 5 hr drive. So my Ex & her nephew picked me up at 11 and
we were on the road again.

About 4 hrs into the trip my Ex pulled over to swap drivers as she
couldn't drive any more. She had tears running down her face, and was
having a hard time not laughing. It seemed that I had fallen asleep
and would jerk awake everytime the car went around a bend, then fall
back to asleep again. Well that would explain the funny looks that I
used to get when I slept while flying.

There were 3 other families in attendance, and since we all stayed at
the same "house" we all became a family of friends. Nothing like a
family discussion lasting till the wee hours of the morning.

We participated in Family "Group" sessions with the other families in
addition to whole group sessions with 20 other " Residents " many of
whose families were unable to make it. In a lot of ways this was a
very interesting 4 days, I met people who have a greater problem than
my son has, and others not so intense.

This also has brought my son & I closer than we've ever been in the
last 18 years. He found out things about me and I found out things
about him that neither of us knew.

I also learned a lot about myself that weekend, lots of things in
which I need to work on.

During the "group" sessions, those whose family members couldn't be
there had letters written to them, which were read aloud, by other
members of the group & the families, we all took a turn. It was
interesting to say the least.

In the end result my son & I have started mending the rift that has
come between us.

My Ex & I are continually working on being civil to one another as we
both realize that we both need to be there for our son.

On Sun, 19 Jun 2005 17:55:30 GMT, Alex Nemeth
wrote:


Note: This post was started on May 28th & I'm just being able to
finish it due to work commitments

Work's a bitch at times. *******s won't pay you if you don't go.
What's with that? ;-)

Hi All.

Isn't the internet great !!!

Heh. It has its moments!

It's good to be back, so on to my tale :-)

I'm rapt....

I also ( not too much recently ) post to another group, and we get
together fairly regularly, ( Called Boinks )

I had a blast at a boink in London last summer with the t.r crew...my
other group at the time....

it's nothing to get
15-20 people together for a weekend of good food, Fun and company. 2
weeks ago 17 of us got together for a week on Folly Beach in S.C. (
Just outside Charleston) . Got a nice tan, and played in the water (
water was 75 degrees ) Watched some kewl southern storms. I didn't
cook, but did a lot of "clean-up" duties. It really is like an
extended family, several of them I have known for more than 10 yrs.

What a blast! One of the fun things this year, with all of the travel
in my life, has been meeting so many net buddies. Looks like Paul & I
will be able to get together with Dennis next month, and I'm looking
forward to that, as well. Takes me back to the old BBS days of yore,
when we got together and had floppy disk tosses and cheap Mexican
food. Damn, I'm old, and damn, I'm a geek! LOL

[snip adventures with netfriends]

Some of you may remember that my son has a Drug & Alcohol addiction
problem. After violating parole and spending over 30 days in jail (
which he didn't like one bit ) , they sent him to a long term Rehab
center up north. We had to be there by 6pm or we wouldn't be able to
see him and participate in the family portion of his rehab, and it was
at least a 5 hr drive. So my Ex & her nephew picked me up at 11 and
we were on the road again.

I actually don't think I knew that, but ouch, that hurts. More power
to you for being there for him (as parents, a lot of times it doesn't
feel like a choice, but it is, and the 'more power' stands...).

About 4 hrs into the trip my Ex pulled over to swap drivers as she
couldn't drive any more. She had tears running down her face, and was
having a hard time not laughing. It seemed that I had fallen asleep
and would jerk awake everytime the car went around a bend, then fall
back to asleep again. Well that would explain the funny looks that I
used to get when I slept while flying.

Heh. Yeah. I'll keep all comments about anything Paul might do while
asleep to myself, in case I need to have similar circumspection from
him....[g]

There were 3 other families in attendance, and since we all stayed at
the same "house" we all became a family of friends. Nothing like a
family discussion lasting till the wee hours of the morning.

To be sure. Deep, sometimes painful, and worth doing, usually.....

We participated in Family "Group" sessions with the other families in
addition to whole group sessions with 20 other " Residents " many of
whose families were unable to make it. In a lot of ways this was a
very interesting 4 days, I met people who have a greater problem than
my son has, and others not so intense.

Your son had both of his parents there, though, and that has to auger
well for him.

It's a bit that way for me with T's recovery & PTSD. Some seem to come
through more easily, and some are so much worse. Perspective is
helpful, although you always want yours to be the one recovering
'best'. I had a student a few years back who had Down Syndrome. Her
mother, who was very bright and capable and who had raised two healthy
teens at that point, once said to me, "When I found out she had Downs,
I figured, okay, so she's going to be the BEST Downs kid...." Of
course, she wasn't, she was a fairly lowish DS kid....and so the mom
had to grieve that, after grieving the DS itself. For us, when ours
get hurt, or show hurt, it sometimes feels the same....first you
grieve what's wrong...then you greive what's not working to get them
well....

Anyway. Mine's coming along nicely and I hope yours is too.

This also has brought my son & I closer than we've ever been in the
last 18 years. He found out things about me and I found out things
about him that neither of us knew.

That can only be good.

I also learned a lot about myself that weekend, lots of things in
which I need to work on.

And again. Nothing like hurting kids to teach us what we haven't yet
learned, is there? [warm smile]

During the "group" sessions, those whose family members couldn't be
there had letters written to them, which were read aloud, by other
members of the group & the families, we all took a turn. It was
interesting to say the least.

I can only imagine.

In the end result my son & I have started mending the rift that has
come between us.

I'm so glad. That's a wonderful thing...a start. You can't get
anywhere without a beginning. I wish you all strength and courage and
health in the healing.

My Ex & I are continually working on being civil to one another as we
both realize that we both need to be there for our son.

Good going. I know what that's like and I know it's not always easy.
It's always worth it, though. More power to you.

Be well.

Cele

On Tue, 21 Jun 2005 04:58:07 GMT, Cele wrote:


And again. Nothing like hurting kids to teach us what we haven't yet
learned, is there? [warm smile]

Oooops. I re-read and realized this was ambiguous. What I meant was,
that there's nothing like having children who are hurting, and
watching them hurt, to teach us what we still need to learn about
life.

I hope that clarifies. I didn't mean 'hurting' as a verb. I meant it
as an adjective.

Sheesh. I'm losing the plot. Must be late June.

Cele