7yr old and started breastfeeding again

hey guys,

my son started breast feeding again and it's really creeping me
out. I had my daughter about 3 months ago and we share a bed
together. she feeds thru the night and one day I noticed that
my son was in bed with us also.

I didn't think this was a big deal...I thought it was really sweet
at 1st. then I woke up 3 nights ago and we was suckling on my
breast.

I told him "Mommy doesn't want you feeding off her anymore. this
is for Doris now." he threw a fit and cried. the next day he
was hysterical and demanded my breast. I finally caved in and let
him feed.

i'm really embarassed by this. we go to the mall & I'm afraid he'll
demand my breast out in public and then i'll have to show the world
that i'm breast feeding a 7yr old boy.

I feel horrible. it's also creepy b/c He's 7yrs old!! so far Doris
hasn't been upset by any of this and i think she is too young to be
upset by it.

what do I do? any advice? is this sexual in nature? he is 7yrs
old

-Deb

No way should you give in.

.... and having your other baby in bed with you is not good either:

It will distroy your sex life and may permanently damage your marital
relationship.

Apart from that the constant supply of milk thru the night is not good for
the child's teeth. Ask a dentist if you don't believe me!

wrote in message
...
hey guys,

my son started breast feeding again and it's really creeping me
out. I had my daughter about 3 months ago and we share a bed
together. she feeds thru the night and one day I noticed that
my son was in bed with us also.

I didn't think this was a big deal...I thought it was really sweet
at 1st. then I woke up 3 nights ago and we was suckling on my
breast.

I told him "Mommy doesn't want you feeding off her anymore. this
is for Doris now." he threw a fit and cried. the next day he
was hysterical and demanded my breast. I finally caved in and let
him feed.

i'm really embarassed by this. we go to the mall & I'm afraid he'll
demand my breast out in public and then i'll have to show the world
that i'm breast feeding a 7yr old boy.

I feel horrible. it's also creepy b/c He's 7yrs old!! so far Doris
hasn't been upset by any of this and i think she is too young to be
upset by it.

what do I do? any advice? is this sexual in nature? he is 7yrs
old

-Deb

Hi -

First of all, congratulations on your baby. It's great that you're
co-sleeping with her and nursing.

As for your 7-year old, you need to take a combination approach.

First, make sure you're spending PLENTY of time with him when he's
awake. Give him 1 on 1 time without the baby whenever you can. This
may be partly an attention-getting thing.

Next, NO, you've got to be firm. Even if he screams, he's not the kid
who nurses. He's the kid who's in grade school, who can throw balls,
etc. Remind him of what he IS and what he CAN do that the baby can't.
And be firm about what he CAN'T do. He can't fight with other kids, he
can't eat dessert without dinner, and he can't nurse.

Third, TALK with him. (Maybe this should be first :-)) Talk about the
changes brought along by the baby, about how much you think of him, your
big kid, and let him talk with you about why he wants to nurse. Then
you talk to him about bodily privacy and why it's okay for a baby to
nurse but not a big kid.

You've got to be firm about the nursing, but give in where you can in
other domains; his life has just changed a great deal.

Good luck,
--Beth Kevles

http://web.mit.edu/kevles/www/nomilk.html -- a page for the milk-allergic
Disclaimer: Nothing in this message should be construed as medical
advice. Please consult with your own medical practicioner.

NOTE: No email is read at my MIT address. Use the AOL one if you would
like me to reply.

CJS wrote:
... and having your other baby in bed with you is not good either:

It will distroy your sex life and may permanently damage your marital
relationship.

Gosh, I wonder how the 67% of the world's cultures that cosleep are handling
that...


Apart from that the constant supply of milk thru the night is not
good for the child's teeth. Ask a dentist if you don't believe me!


Why don't YOU ask a dentist? The American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry
states that nursing, even night nursing, does not contribute to the
development of ECC.

--
tristyn
www.tristyn.net
"i have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
i do not think that they will sing to me."

wrote:

what do I do? any advice? is this sexual in nature? he is 7yrs
old

If this isn't a troll, I think your bigger problem is that you've got a
seven-year-old to whom you're afraid to say "no."
And of course it's not sexual, he's seven years old. It's comfort.

--
tristyn
www.tristyn.net
"i have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
i do not think that they will sing to me."

iphigenia wrote:

CJS wrote:

... and having your other baby in bed with you is not good either:

It will distroy your sex life and may permanently damage your marital
relationship.

Gosh, I wonder how the 67% of the world's cultures that cosleep are handling
that...

The same way they handle starvation and cholera. They tolerate it because
it cannot be changed.

-TOE

snip

--
tristyn
www.tristyn.net
"i have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
i do not think that they will sing to me."

"CJS" wrote in message
...
No way should you give in.

... and having your other baby in bed with you is not good either:

It will distroy your sex life and may permanently damage your marital
relationship.

Oh ye of little imagination...
--
Be well, Barbara
(Julian [6], Aurora [4], and Vernon's [20mo] mom)

This week's special at the English Language Butcher Shop:
"Rejuvinate your skin." -- Hydroderm ad

Daddy: You're up with the chickens this morning.
Aurora: No, I'm up with my dolls!

All opinions expressed in this post are well-reasoned and insightful.
Needless to say, they are not those of my Internet Service Provider, its
other subscribers or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itchin' for a
fight. -- with apologies to Michael Feldman

In article Zfsub.8600$iS6.6884@fed1read04, Circe says...

"CJS" wrote in message
...
No way should you give in.

... and having your other baby in bed with you is not good either:

It will distroy your sex life and may permanently damage your marital
relationship.

Oh ye of little imagination...

I wish these guys could spell better. He mispelled "I only have sex in bed at
night". Maybe he needs to meet one of the boyfriends spoken of on another
thread who boff ex-wives all day ;-)

Banty

It will distroy your sex life and may permanently damage your marital
relationship.

Oh ye of little imagination...

I wish these guys could spell better. He mispelled "I only have sex in
bed at
night". Maybe he needs to meet one of the boyfriends spoken of on another
thread who boff ex-wives all day ;-)

Some people have day jobs.

"Beth Kevles" wrote in message
...

Hi -

First of all, congratulations on your baby. It's great that you're
co-sleeping with her and nursing.


This is great when they are so young, but I know of a child who was still
seeping with his mother and nursing when he was four.
The mother had to go to bed when he did and the couple had no adult time
together for all those years. Their marriage broke down.

The child was used to having a feed whenever he wanted as mum was always
there and he would have tantrums if he didn't get food or drink on demand. I
think it is better to try and establish a regular pattern with feeding and
sleeping as soon as you can. The older they get the harder it becomes to
break the habit.

As for your 7-year old, you need to take a combination approach.

First, make sure you're spending PLENTY of time with him when he's
awake. Give him 1 on 1 time without the baby whenever you can. This
may be partly an attention-getting thing.

That is very probable. Most children feel quite jealous when a new baby
suddenly takes all the attention. You have to make sure the older one
doesn't feel rejected.
Perhaps dad can spend more time with him, take him swimming or something
like that while you are busy with baby.


Next, NO, you've got to be firm. Even if he screams, he's not the kid
who nurses. He's the kid who's in grade school, who can throw balls,
etc. Remind him of what he IS and what he CAN do that the baby can't.
And be firm about what he CAN'T do. He can't fight with other kids, he
can't eat dessert without dinner, and he can't nurse.

I was sort of wondering whether perhaps his demands stem from the fact he
was allowed to nurse thru the night for too long and so finds it only too
easy to slip back into that habit. When did you stop nursing him in your
bed?