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Is there an equation ?



 
 
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  #21  
Old January 27th 04, 03:53 PM
Sophie
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Default Is there an equation ?


"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Ian wrote:


My buddies house (with 5 kids) looks
like a bomb has hit it. I could not live that way.



This is also a choice. You don't have to live
in a pig sty with multiple kids. As you say, if your friend
and his wife can spend all that time gaming, they could
instead devote a small portion of that time to tidying
the house (and teaching the kids to pick up after
themselves). Several of the large families I know
have the neatest homes you'll see.

Best wishes,
Ericka


I can not stand clutter. We have 2 times in the day we tidy up. I go to bed
with a neat house cos I could not stand to wake up to a messy one.
Obviously that's not a priority to Ian's friends, but probably not cos they
have 5 kids.


  #22  
Old January 27th 04, 04:06 PM
Ericka Kammerer
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Default Is there an equation ?

Ian wrote:


My buddies house (with 5 kids) looks
like a bomb has hit it. I could not live that way.



This is also a choice. You don't have to live
in a pig sty with multiple kids. As you say, if your friend
and his wife can spend all that time gaming, they could
instead devote a small portion of that time to tidying
the house (and teaching the kids to pick up after
themselves). Several of the large families I know
have the neatest homes you'll see.

Best wishes,
Ericka

  #23  
Old January 27th 04, 04:19 PM
dragonlady
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Default Is there an equation ?

In article ,
"Sophie" wrote:

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Ian wrote:


My buddies house (with 5 kids) looks
like a bomb has hit it. I could not live that way.



This is also a choice. You don't have to live
in a pig sty with multiple kids. As you say, if your friend
and his wife can spend all that time gaming, they could
instead devote a small portion of that time to tidying
the house (and teaching the kids to pick up after
themselves). Several of the large families I know
have the neatest homes you'll see.

Best wishes,
Ericka


I can not stand clutter. We have 2 times in the day we tidy up. I go to bed
with a neat house cos I could not stand to wake up to a messy one.
Obviously that's not a priority to Ian's friends, but probably not cos they
have 5 kids.



Or possibly because a neat and tidy house is not a high value for them.

One of the things I liked when my twins were small is that people seemed
to think my house was always close to the verge of disaster because I
had 3 little kids (I had a 3 yo when the twins were born). After all,
they'd say, I couldn't expect to keep the floor shiney while taking care
of that many kids!

What they didn't know is that my house didn't look all that much worse
than BEFORE I had kids. It's reasonably clean under the clutter, and we
still sit down to a set dinner table for a meal together most evenings
(I say most because with 3 different schools, 5 different jobs, and,
right now, 2 different plays, there are increasingly fewer evenings
when we're all home!) -- I just don't value non-clutter all that much.

meh

meh
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

  #24  
Old January 27th 04, 04:40 PM
Kari
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Default Is there an equation ?

Actually I know plenty of moms with "lots" of kids who have more free time
then moms of 1 or 2. Moms of more tend to be more organized for one

thing.
We don't think we have to entertain baby 24/7. My kids have siblings for
that



Hey Sophie, wanna come up here and have C & P teach my 2 how to play
together? All they do is fight!!!! ;o)

Kari
mom to Kaylie (8) Noah (4) and the sleepless Xan man (3 mos)


  #25  
Old January 27th 04, 04:42 PM
Kari
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Default Is there an equation ?


Why not be honest to the OP? 2, 3 kids ARE more work than one.


That's not how it was for me. I was so busy with my first trying to keep her
entertained and taking her to the park every day, etc. By the time #3 rolled
around, I dont go out much, my oldest is in school, my son is very good at
keeping himself occupied. I feel like I have way more time during the days
now than I did then. In the busy time in the evenings, my husband helps out
by running them to practice, etc while I make dinner and care for the baby.

Kari


  #26  
Old January 27th 04, 05:59 PM
Kari
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Default Is there an equation ?

..
Finances. IME (not a lot) two kids are twice as expensive as one.


Yes and no for us. Insurance is the same, yes. Food, hardly any more because
my kids eat like birds and they eat the same kind of foods as we do (no
junkish kid food like hot dogs, chicken nuggets etc) I make my own baby food
from foods we eat anyway. I dont keep clothes to hand me down because of the
age gaps, I'd be storing stuff forever, but I shop on sale and on ebay but
that is one area I dont buy cheap unfortunately, I just can't help it (it's
an addiction really But college savings, yes it's definately more. We
have seperate savings accounts, IRA's, etc for each one and we put about
600.00 a month going into those for all 3. Dance classes (130.00 a month)
and Martial Arts (115.00 a month) are the only other things I can think of
though that are the big "extras" because everything else big like housing,
cars, utilities, we would be spending the same on with 1 or 3.

Kari
mom to Kaylie (8) Noah (4) and Xander (3 mos)




  #27  
Old January 27th 04, 06:01 PM
Kari
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Default Is there an equation ?

..

I suspect that has less to do with having 5 kids, and more to do with
their lack of concern over cleaning up. I know people with *1* child
whose home looks like it should be condemned, and people with 3 or
more, whose homes are neat and tidy.

Nan


Exactly. My house looks no different now than it did before we had kids.
Granted, I do work harder to keep it that way but Im not working *that*
hard. I just have to plan out and keep up with it, like laundry is every
day, dishes, picking up toys, vacuuming through at the end of the evening is
stuff I do every day. Bigger things like scrubbing the tub, floors, etc I do
once a week.


Kari
mom to Kaylie (8) Noah (4) and Xander (3 mos)


  #29  
Old January 27th 04, 06:12 PM
Circe
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Default Is there an equation ?

Bev Brandt wrote:
There was a thread similar to this one several years ago started by (I
believe) Barbara.


Yep, it was me! You've got a great memory, Bev!

She said that she didn't think three children were
any more difficult than two. I disagreed and said that my three were
far more difficult than before when they were just "my two." Some of
the reasons I said that had to do with ages and personalities. My
oldest will always be active, attention-grabbing and he'll always take
a lot of energy. So at the time, having a *baby* in the mix *was*
difficult.

Now, oldest is still energetic and an attention-grabber, but he has
school and soccer and homework and lots of different interests, so
he's a little easier to entertain. And youngest isn't a baby anymore
and he's a little lower maintenance. So right *now*, three takes as
much energy as probably two, or even one.

I think I got lucky. I never found three to be significantly more difficult
than two, though it helped a *lot* that my third was a very easy-going baby
and is still a pretty easy-going (albeit physically precocious) toddler. It
helps that my older kids get along at least half the time and that, during
the half when they're not, I only intervene if there is imminent danger of
someone getting badly hurt--otherwise, they have to sort it out themselves.

I'd say my multiplier was:

1 = 2x as much work as none
2 = 3x as much work as none, 1x more work than two
3 = 3.5x as much work as none, 1.5x more work than one

And that's been pretty consistent since #3 was born, but we've only been at
the three kid gig for 22 months, so I'm sure it will fluctuate.

When they're all in grade school, it'll probably be different.


What I always worry about is three kids with homework. It's hard enough
getting Son1 to do his homework. I hope Daughter and Son2 turn out to be
less resistant, or it's going to be hell around here every school evening
around 5pm! Ugh!
--
Be well, Barbara
(Julian [6], Aurora [4], and Vernon's [22 mos.] mom)

This week's special at the English Language Butcher Shop:
Financing for "5" years -- car dealership sign

Mommy: I call you "baby" because I love you.
Julian (age 4): Oh! All right, Mommy baby.

All opinions expressed in this post are well-reasoned and insightful.
Needless to say, they are not those of my Internet Service Provider, its
other subscribers or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itchin' for a
fight. -- with apologies to Michael Feldman


  #30  
Old January 27th 04, 06:23 PM
Robyn Kozierok
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Default Is there an equation ?

In article ,
Kari wrote:
I dont keep clothes to hand me down because of the
age gaps, I'd be storing stuff forever, but I shop on sale and on ebay but
that is one area I dont buy cheap unfortunately, I just can't help it (it's
an addiction really

Kari
mom to Kaylie (8) Noah (4) and Xander (3 mos)


I'm surprised, given that you like to buy expensive, high quality
clothing, that you don't save it to hand down. Many of my 2yo's
high-quality clothing items have been through his 10yo brother, his 9yo
cousin (though we quit sending clothes to the cousin at around 2T - 3T
because he was getting as big as my own son), and his 7yo brother
before him! I just have big sterilite containers in the attic labelled
by size and I rotate in/out sizes and seasons as needed. The younger
boys do get some new stuff of their own, but for high quality items
that aren't worn out, I can't imagine doing anything *but* saving
them, and my age gaps are almost identical to yours. I can understand
not saving most things from your daughter, but between your two boys,
I'm surprised.

Robyn (mommy to Ryan 9/93 and Matthew 6/96 and Evan 3/01)
--
Support a family business and learn about the technologies underlying
the Internet with the TCP/IP Guide! http://www.tcpipguide.com
 




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