A Parenting & kids forum. ParentingBanter.com

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » ParentingBanter.com forum » misc.kids » General
Site Map Home Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Time Article - What Teachers Hate about Parents (x-posted)



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #22  
Old February 24th 05, 05:38 PM
Ericka Kammerer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Ruth Baltopoulos wrote:


Here is my strategy: I provide a place for homework to be
done and access to computers. I ask if it has been
completed (sometimes). I stay in touch with the school
(PTO, Conferences, Open Houses, School Committee) and
teachers are aware that I am interested in knowing of any
challenges or foibles. The end.


That strategy works fabulously under normal
circumstances. Under other situations, it doesn't work
out quite so well. There are nights my 4th grader comes
home with so much homework that if it happens on a day
when we have to do *anything* after school other than
eat dinner, he's up well past his bedtime to finish
it. Once he's that tired, if one of us is not sitting
with him to keep him focused, he falls asleep at his
desk. And heaven forbid you have a child with attention
issues, for whom it tends to take longer for homework
to get done in the first place and who might well require
parental attention to keep focus. And then there are
the children who are struggling with the material and
require substantial help from the parent to *teach* the
material in order for the child to be able to complete
the homework. And that's before we get to the stupid
assignments designed to create more "parental involvement"
that *require* the parent to participate--we have quite
a few of those. The instructions actually *tell* the
parent what the parent is supposed to be doing (so it's
not the child just conning the parent into doing it).
There are far too many nights when I'm wrung
out from attending to the needs of two kids' homework.
I resent that there are so many fun and educational
things we could do as a family, but our time to do
so is severely limited by the amount of homework that
is sent home. I do not see how well over an hour of
homework is appropriate in elementary school--add the
homework to the amount of time they're in school,
and many of these kids are putting in 50+ hour
weeks!
So, if you have a school that is sending home
reasonable amounts and types of homework, and is teaching
the children the material before assigning homework on
it, and your children don't have any extenuating
circumstances that make homework more challenging
than normal, I envy you. In that situation, I would
happily stay the heck out of the way while my kids
got their homework done, just as my parents did for
me. Unfortunately, I believe that the situation here
actively *UNDERMINES* children learning to be responsible
for their own homework by making it virtually impossible
for the children to take full responsibility for it.
Some years we have teachers who don't buy into the
homework overload madness, and those years are *so*
much better for us as a family--and (surprise, surprise)
the kids still manage to learn just as much or more
in those classes as the ones with mountains of homework.

Best wishes,
Ericka

  #23  
Old February 24th 05, 05:51 PM
Ruth Baltopoulos
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...

: That strategy works fabulously under normal
: circumstances. Under other situations, it doesn't work
: out quite so well. [...]
: So, if you have a school that is sending home
: reasonable amounts and types of homework, and is teaching
: the children the material before assigning homework on
: it, and your children don't have any extenuating
: circumstances that make homework more challenging
: than normal, I envy you. [...]
: Unfortunately, I believe that the situation here
: actively *UNDERMINES* children learning to be responsible
: for their own homework by making it virtually impossible
: for the children to take full responsibility for it.[...]

Well, that sounds horrid and I don't envy you. I guess one
of the difficult things for me was hearing many people in
the same school district lamenting a situation that I
clearly was not experiencing. I am not sure how that could
be. My children are good students and have decent study
skills, but they are not in the Gifted and Talented Program
I do have a problem with 'homework' that is new
material, which has happened periodically.

Is there no viable way to address such legitimate concerns
with the School District or the School Committee? If it is
clearly a serious problem across the board, is there no
recourse? Again, I don't envy the descripiton of your
situation.
--
Ruth



  #25  
Old February 24th 05, 06:13 PM
dragonlady
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In article ,
"Bruce Bridgman and Jeanne Yang" wrote:


Then obviously something has to give - usually a class. Rarely (or has
things really changed that much) do schools require six classes and three
electives. Drop an elective or two. But even if this is the case, I don't
think heavy coursework is a legitimate reason for parents to do their
children's homework.


This becomes a problem for kids whose biggest interests and talent (and
therefore most joy) is outside of the academically required classes. I
believe a well rounded education includes some music and art and
physical education, so for kids like the boy in question, who was
clearly very good at physical stuff, it does NOT seem reasonable to me
that he should have to give that up.

Frankly, an hour a day per class of homework is just wrong. Even if you
are only taking 4 classes, if you get home at 3:00 in the afternoon, and
spend, say, an hour eating dinner with your family and doing some
household chores, you will not be done with your homework until 8:00.
That leaves no time for sports, or theater, or any of the other things
that might make a life more well rounded.
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

  #27  
Old February 24th 05, 06:21 PM
dragonlady
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In article ,
"Jen" wrote:

"toto" wrote in message
news
Any anecdotes?


Many!!!
A mom once burst into my Grade 11 English class to berate my teacher about a
mark her son had recieved. Aparently a B isn't good enough and her son
couldn't possibly be that stupid, and the teacher was obviously being
stubborn and should give him an A.
Her son sank under the table to hide.



The only time I can remember my mother challenging a grade she did it in
private. My certifiably brilliant baby brother worked hard to maintain
a B+ average (seriously -- he didn't want the hassle of extra work he'd
get if he got labled Really Smart). He brought home an essay with a
"C", and Mom went in to ask the teacher why it was a C paper. The
teacher told her it wasn't -- it was a solid "B" paper, but since he was
capable of "A"s, she marked it down to a "C".


Mom pitched a fit, and insisted he be given the grade he'd earned rather
than a grade based on the teacher's annoyance. She won.

(He eventually fitured out what he wanted to do with his life, has an
MBA from Kellogg, and makes more money than God doing work he enjoys.)
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

  #28  
Old February 24th 05, 06:27 PM
dragonlady
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In article ,
"The Ranger" wrote:


The district my daughter-units currently attend, the district they
attended prior, and the high school district they will attend (if our
glorious Guşinator doesn't asset-strip the system)


California's education system has assets left to strip?
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

  #29  
Old February 24th 05, 06:35 PM
Tori M.
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

When I was in school there where a few concepts that I could not grasp in
science and in math but when I complained to the teacher about not
understanding (mostly the science teacher) I was told that I was not trying
hard enough and the proof was I did not do the homework.. Well I did not do
the homework because I did not understand it. My mom never went in to
complain though as I sported low grades in most other classes.. Funny my
low grade in Algebra went from a f to a b average after I got a tutor that
spent 2 days a week explaining it to me! I refused to take math and science
my senior year because I did not want to spend yet enouther year trying to
figure out what in the world they are talking about.

We are going to homeschool but Jeff is taking over math and science at at
least High School.. Maybe Jr High.

Tori

--
Bonnie 3/02
Xavier 10/04
"toto" wrote in message
news
Any anecdotes?

I have several, but the one that is pertinent he
A parent came to the school with a complaint about homework in
geometry class. Parent said "If he can't get his work done in school,
he won't do it at home. It cuts into my quality time with my son if
he has homework to do."

You have to subscribe to Time Magazine (or go to the library
to get the whole article). I read it in print.

http://www.time.com/time/covers/1101050221/story.html

Parents Behaving Badly

Inside the new classroom power struggle: What teachers say
about pushy moms and dads who drive them crazy

By NANCY GIBBS

Posted Sunday, February 13, 2005
If you could walk past the teachers' lounge and listen in, what sorts
of stories would you hear?

An Iowa high school counselor gets a call from a parent protesting the
C her child received on an assignment. "The parent argued every point
in the essay," recalls the counselor, who soon realized why the mother
was so upset about the grade. "It became apparent that she'd written
it."

A sixth-grade teacher in California tells a girl in her class that she
needs to work on her reading at home, not just in school. "Her mom
came in the next day," the teacher says, "and started yelling at me
that I had emotionally upset her child."


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits



  #30  
Old February 24th 05, 06:41 PM
Ericka Kammerer
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Ruth Baltopoulos wrote:


Is there no viable way to address such legitimate concerns
with the School District or the School Committee? If it is
clearly a serious problem across the board, is there no
recourse? Again, I don't envy the descripiton of your
situation.


It's difficult to address right now because it's
so variable. This year, my 2nd grader has a fabulous
teacher and his hasn't been a problem. I hardly know
he *has* homework--he just does it ;-) My 4th grader
has a teacher I like very much, but I think she's
somewhat scatterbrained about the homework. I don't
think she *means* to overwhelm the kids, but it
happens anyway. I think what happens is that she has
a "normal" homework schedule that is just a bit on the
high side, but nothing I'd make a stink over if most
weeks were "normal" weeks. But what happens in reality
is that there's an ongoing parade of little things that
bring extra assignments (long term projects, things assigned
by special teachers, makeups for classwork that was pre-empted
by assemblies/special events, etc.) or other things that
muck with the schedule. I think she also isn't the best
at estimating how long it will take for homework. She
seems to think that math homework will take a long time,
but everything else won't take long at all. I don't think
many 4th graders can write a clean draft of a five paragraph
essay from scratch in 15-20 minutes (which I assume is what
she's estimating, given that she thinks a half hour of reading,
an essay, and a couple of math worksheets can be done in
an hour). So, several of us parents raise the issue now
and again, and it usually results in her being more careful
for a bit, but then the homework level creeps back up again.
We all like her so much we don't really want to nag her
about it, and we don't want to go over her head to the
principal, but we also don't want our lives to be consumed
by homework... I could make a stink with the principal
and it would likely do some good (we have a fabulous principal),
but it just doesn't seem warranted in this situation. I have
talked to him about homework in past situations with some
benefit.
And then there's the issue of activities. Our
schedule is such that our kids have at least an uninterrupted
hour every school day to do homework, plus additional time
for reading. For me to schedule more than that (and still
maintain the bedtimes my kids need to be civilized human
beings ;-) would mean absolutely no activities during the
week. My kids love the things they do, and I don't think
it's excessive (well, except during Nutcracker season ;-)
and it doesn't seem reasonable to me to deny them their
activities just to make sure that they can devote two or
three hours to homework every night when they won't actually
*have* that much every night. We've discussed the possibility
of having homework assigned on a weekly basis so they can
work ahead the nights they have more time, but the teachers
don't want to do that (for assorted reasons, some of which
make some sense and others of which just seem crazy to me).
We do have them work ahead on some things that they know
will be coming with some regularity.
Anyway, this year isn't as bad as some have been,
so we're mostly managing. Last year was pretty bad. I'm
a little afraid of next year, because 3rd grade is pretty
tough and I've heard rumors that the 5th grade teachers
are heavier on the homework. Also, in 5th grade DS1 will
go back to having different teachers for language arts,
math, and science, and there's ample opportunity for
lack of communication among all the teachers to result
in mountains of homework on some nights.
We try to find some sort of balance, but it is
often frustrating. I just wish there wasn't this
culture of "more homework = better education" fueling
this whole thing. It would make things a lot easier.

Best wishes,
Ericka

 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
misc.kids FAQ on Good things about having kids [email protected] Info and FAQ's 0 June 28th 04 07:42 PM
misc.kids FAQ on Breastfeeding Past the First Year [email protected] Info and FAQ's 0 June 28th 04 07:41 PM
| | Kids should work... Kane Foster Parents 3 December 9th 03 12:53 AM
The Plant answer DNA swab Question Kane Spanking 11 September 26th 03 09:14 AM
DCF CT monitor finds kids *worsen* while in state custody Kane General 8 August 13th 03 07:43 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 09:40 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 ParentingBanter.com.
The comments are property of their posters.