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kids and their furniture?



 
 
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  #11  
Old February 3rd 06, 02:17 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?


"dkhedmo" wrote in message
ink.net...
Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms? Do you
feel the stuff is theirs to do with as they please, or do you feel it
belongs to the family as a whole and expect things to be treated with a
certain amount of care?


Our kids furniture has been rummage sale/tag sale stuff, it doesn't have any
particular meaning to me, so I don't really care what they do to it. We had
sticker incidents with one bed and one dresser. Dresser still has
DragonballZ stickers on it.

DS16 has DH's great-great-grandfathers bed now, but we didn't give it to him
until he was about 12 I think.


  #12  
Old February 3rd 06, 02:19 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?


"Rosalie B." wrote in message
...

I once carved my initials in the newel post of the house we lived in -
I was a bit older than your ds.


I got a little cherry nightstand at a used furniture store for 12 bucks, I
loved the style and it had a label from a furniture company in a neighboring
county.
When I was rubbing orange oil into it I took out the drawer, and some child
had written in pencil on the inside "February 13, 1946" with a bunch of
little hearts. I thought that was very sweet!


  #13  
Old February 3rd 06, 03:24 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?

On Fri, 03 Feb 2006 03:28:34 GMT, dkhedmo
wrote:

Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms? Do you
feel the stuff is theirs to do with as they please, or do you feel it
belongs to the family as a whole and expect things to be treated with a
certain amount of care?

Do you feel differently about items that are specifically kid
sized/designed for kids than you do about regular furniture pieces that
are in the kid areas? For example, a kid sized table and chairs set: how
would you feel about the child purposefully drawing a picture on the
table in marker that could not be removed easily? How would you feel
about marker markings on a mattress or dresser? Stickers on a lamp? Glue
on the bedding?

I'm sure you can all see where this is going! We are in a very small
place and the only area we can guarantee ds1 5.5yo freedom from the
maurauding toddler little brother is his room, which we keep gated off
so he can have all his "big boy" stuff, which includes various craft
supplies, as ds1 loves to make pictures etc and it keeps him quite
happily busy often. Unfortunately, he also tends to space out and do
goofy little things without thinking. I don't think he's being
purposefully destructive, but it's really annoying to see scribbling on
the new boombox, marker on the mattress or sheets, inky fingers smeared
on the lamp.

Some of the furniture in question are things that might be handed down
to said maurauding toddler in time, or be put into other areas of the
home such as a guest room, etc when we are in place with more space and
start aquiring more furniture.

Opinions?

-Karen-


Everything in dd1's room is old/thrift shop/yard sale stuff, so it's
not special. That said, I do teach her to respect it, as I want her
to respect the nicer furniture in the family areas.
We've had some incidents where she's put stickers on things, or drawn
on things and I've just talked to her about it and required that she
use her art/craft items in the kitchen instead. We gate the kitchen
off so her younger sister can't bother her.

Nan

  #14  
Old February 3rd 06, 03:28 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?

dkhedmo wrote:
Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms?


Thanks for the input, everyone. When I was in ds' room the other day and
we were working together on cleaning up some of theses issues, I did
give him a pretty stern talking to about the situation and my
expectations that things should be kept in a reasonable condition, art
work on paper, that the items belong to the family and not just him,
respecting the home etc. I told him I was taking note of the current
condition of the items and that any further transgressions would result
in removal of something, either supplies or defaced items or both. But
then afterward I wondered whether other people had the same
expectations, or felt that once items had been given for the kids' use
they could do as they pleased with them. (I know some people who would
make a case for this scenario.)

He had had these materials available in the past in the living room,
which was more supervised, but it became an issue as Little Brother
became more mobile and I didn't want to "punish" the older one by
completely removing access to things he had free reign with in the past.
There were other big-kid items that needed protection as well, and as
part of encouraging a discontinuation of co-sleeping arrangements with
the older one, we agreed we'd put all the big boy items in the second
bedroom (which had been guest room/diaper changing facility/playroom for
both) and keep it protected from ds2 if ds1 permanently moved his
sleeping arrangements to said room.

I am going to give the situation another chance, as the alternative
would result in restraining the toddler every time ds1 wanted to work on
something, which is often. Our space is very limited and to supervise
both kids means ds1 at the kitchen table and a very exuberant toddler
stuck in a high chair or gated off from 50% of the downstairs area. Ds1
knows that if I say I will take away things or privileges that I will do
it and that he will have to put in some hard work to earn back lost
items and priviledges over time.

-Karen-
  #15  
Old February 3rd 06, 04:04 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?

"dkhedmo" wrote in message
ink.net...
Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms? Do you
feel the stuff is theirs to do with as they please, or do you feel it
belongs to the family as a whole and expect things to be treated with a
certain amount of care?


I feel it belongs to the family and they should treat it with care. However,
we don't have much furniture for the kids or us because we haven't been able
to afford much for them yet. DD1 is the only one with a nice bed and
mattress and that's because my mom bought it when she needed to switch to a
bed. I am in the process of redoing everyone's rooms and will be purchasing
new bedroom furniture for the other two girls. I will expect them to take
care of it.

Do you feel differently about items that are specifically kid
sized/designed for kids than you do about regular furniture pieces that
are in the kid areas? For example, a kid sized table and chairs set: how
would you feel about the child purposefully drawing a picture on the
table in marker that could not be removed easily? How would you feel
about marker markings on a mattress or dresser? Stickers on a lamp? Glue

on the bedding?

DD3 got a hold of some nail polish and painted her white dresser bright red.
I was extremely upset, but at the same time, the dresser wasn't that nice.
It can be sanded and redone and that's what I plan to do. My kids are pretty
rough on our furniture and stuff so we really don't have anything nice and I
don't plan on getting anything nice until they are able to respect our stuff
more. I think teaching the kids to treat objects with respect is something
that I should have done or I have neglected to do because it does seem my
kids don't care about stuff like their dad and I do.

Opinions?


I don't have much advice, like I said my kids don't have a lot of respect
for their stuff. I just don't really buy anything expensive or nice anymore
until they can handle themselves more. And as far as the couch in our family
room, which is horrible, it's up to me to be consistent and make them not
eat on the couch or the rug and I plan to once we have anything worth
keeping.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)


  #16  
Old February 3rd 06, 04:49 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?


dkhedmo wrote:
Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms? Do you
feel the stuff is theirs to do with as they please, or do you feel it
belongs to the family as a whole and expect things to be treated with a
certain amount of care?


Regardless of ownership, I'd expecty it to be treated with care.

Do you feel differently about items that are specifically kid
sized/designed for kids than you do about regular furniture pieces that
are in the kid areas? For example, a kid sized table and chairs set: how
would you feel about the child purposefully drawing a picture on the
table in marker that could not be removed easily? How would you feel
about marker markings on a mattress or dresser? Stickers on a lamp? Glue
on the bedding?


The purposeful drawing on furniture would not go over well here.
Accidental smearing of things (like the lightswitch in the bathroom,
when DD was going to wash her hands, is totally understandable).
There's a big difference between 'the glue spilled' and 'I smeared it
all over for fun' though -- but DD1 is now 6yo; when she was 1.5yo I
wouldn't have expected her to get this.

I don't see the difference between kid-sized or not, but again, my
perspective is one where kid-sized clothes are always being handed
down, as are kid-sized furniture and toys.

I'm sure you can all see where this is going! We are in a very small
place and the only area we can guarantee ds1 5.5yo freedom from the
maurauding toddler little brother is his room, which we keep gated off
so he can have all his "big boy" stuff, which includes various craft
supplies, as ds1 loves to make pictures etc and it keeps him quite
happily busy often. Unfortunately, he also tends to space out and do
goofy little things without thinking. I don't think he's being
purposefully destructive, but it's really annoying to see scribbling on
the new boombox, marker on the mattress or sheets, inky fingers smeared
on the lamp.


I can't say how I see scribbling on a boombox as accidental, but I tend
to get more wound up about people mistreating furniture than several of
my friends. Most of our furniture is rather old -- not heirloom
quality, but solid dovetailed oak and maple stuff that is built to
withstand use, so I really do expect that within the bounds of normal
use, there will be no damage. I know that particleboard dressers will
collapse if a kid bumps into them or accidentally spills water on them,
though, so perhaps what I define as 'normal use' is a higher threshold
of mistreatment than modern furniture can take...

Some of the furniture in question are things that might be handed down
to said maurauding toddler in time, or be put into other areas of the
home such as a guest room, etc when we are in place with more space and
start aquiring more furniture.


In our playroom and in both girls' bedrooms are *huge* bulletin boards
(4' x 4', homasote, covered with fabric), so the incentive is that they
can make anything and have ample space to put it up to 'decorate' their
rooms.

Caledonia

  #17  
Old February 3rd 06, 05:41 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?

Ericka Kammerer wrote:
dkhedmo wrote:
Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms? Do
you feel the stuff is theirs to do with as they please, or do you
feel it belongs to the family as a whole and expect things to be
treated with a certain amount of care?


I think the ownership issue is a red herring. Regardless
of whether it's mine or theirs, they must still treat it with
care.

I'm sure you can all see where this is going! We are in a very small
place and the only area we can guarantee ds1 5.5yo freedom from the
maurauding toddler little brother is his room, which we keep gated
off so he can have all his "big boy" stuff, which includes various
craft supplies, as ds1 loves to make pictures etc and it keeps him
quite happily busy often. Unfortunately, he also tends to space out
and do goofy little things without thinking. I don't think he's being
purposefully destructive, but it's really annoying to see scribbling
on the new boombox, marker on the mattress or sheets, inky fingers
smeared on the lamp.


Personally, at that age I would say that if he
cannot use the craft supplies with an age-appropriate
amount of care, then the craft supplies get put away
and used only when an adult is able to supervise.
Actually, even if his behavior is age appropriate, I
wouldn't feel that it was okay for him to destroy
things and I would make the craft items supervised toys.


I'm with Ericka. I would probably also designate an easel with and over
sized tablet of paper or table for him to do whatever he wants on/with and
then make everything else of limits. I'd remove all craft things and give
him one item at a time and either supervise or be very concrete about where
that item can be used (ie at table or easel only) and then teach from there.

--
Nikki
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
Thing One and Thing Two :-) EDD 4/06


  #18  
Old February 3rd 06, 06:52 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?


"Nikki" wrote in message
...
Ericka Kammerer wrote:
dkhedmo wrote:
Just wondering about how others feel about how your kids treat the
furniture you provide for them in their bedrooms and playrooms? Do
you feel the stuff is theirs to do with as they please, or do you
feel it belongs to the family as a whole and expect things to be
treated with a certain amount of care?


I think the ownership issue is a red herring. Regardless
of whether it's mine or theirs, they must still treat it with
care.

I'm sure you can all see where this is going! We are in a very small
place and the only area we can guarantee ds1 5.5yo freedom from the
maurauding toddler little brother is his room, which we keep gated
off so he can have all his "big boy" stuff, which includes various
craft supplies, as ds1 loves to make pictures etc and it keeps him
quite happily busy often. Unfortunately, he also tends to space out
and do goofy little things without thinking. I don't think he's being
purposefully destructive, but it's really annoying to see scribbling
on the new boombox, marker on the mattress or sheets, inky fingers
smeared on the lamp.


Personally, at that age I would say that if he
cannot use the craft supplies with an age-appropriate
amount of care, then the craft supplies get put away
and used only when an adult is able to supervise.
Actually, even if his behavior is age appropriate, I
wouldn't feel that it was okay for him to destroy
things and I would make the craft items supervised toys.


I'm with Ericka. I would probably also designate an easel with and over
sized tablet of paper or table for him to do whatever he wants on/with and
then make everything else of limits. I'd remove all craft things and give
him one item at a time and either supervise or be very concrete about
where that item can be used (ie at table or easel only) and then teach
from there.

Yes, I'd agree, generally. But inky fingers, and marker on the sheets can be
totally accidental. I'd give him a chance while you explain that he
shouldn't do this. Then provide a packet of wipes or a damp cloth, and tell
him that he must wipe his fingers on that.
Scribbling on the boombox (whatever that is)doesn't sound like it could be
accidental, so I would either make them erase it if possible, clean it
myself instead of doing something for him (like reading a story/going to the
park)-and say so: "I wanted to take you to the park, but I'm going to have
to clean this up instead. What a pity!" I did this with #1 just after #2 was
born, and she hasn't ever scribbled on something she shouldn't have
since-she'll ask if she's not sure or take away the boom box.
If he continues, I would reduce him to a pencil, rubber and piece of paper.
You can say that he can't use anything that doesn't clean up easily.
Debbie


  #19  
Old February 3rd 06, 07:01 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?

Welches wrote:

Yes, I'd agree, generally. But inky fingers, and marker on the sheets
can be totally accidental. I'd give him a chance while you explain
that he shouldn't do this.


I went back and re-read. The kid in question is 5.5yo. That is pretty old
to be up to these kind of shennangans ;-) I think I'd implement some other
kids of consequences as well. I was thinking a younger child. Oh - and I'd
definately get only washable markers!!

--
Nikki
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
Thing One and Thing Two :-) EDD 4/06


  #20  
Old February 3rd 06, 07:09 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default kids and their furniture?


"Nikki" wrote in message
...
Welches wrote:

Yes, I'd agree, generally. But inky fingers, and marker on the sheets
can be totally accidental. I'd give him a chance while you explain
that he shouldn't do this.


I went back and re-read. The kid in question is 5.5yo. That is pretty
old to be up to these kind of shennangans ;-) I think I'd implement some
other kids of consequences as well. I was thinking a younger child. Oh -
and I'd definately get only washable markers!!

Oh I read it as 1.5 yo. (our computer's playing up and I'm not seeing most
posts). I thought 1.5 was reasonable. 5.5yo isn't in my books. Heck #2
(2.25yo) wouldn't get away with scribbling on the furniture.
But inky fingers can just be that they tend to get inky (stamping and ink
pads are strictly supervised for that reason with ours) and then don't clean
them before they touch something. Tell them not to lean on the bed while
colouring (#2 did this a couple of weeks ago-and poked a hole in the paper,
hence felt tip on the sheets) and provide a table or easle as someone else
suggested. They're old enough to understand at 5yo.
Debbie


 




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