Father's importance no laughing matter

MSNothing wrote:
"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , MSNothing
says...


"Banty" wrote in message
...

Well, neither one of you favor fairness for all.

Banty


Then what would your definition of fairness be.


Abortion illegal, both parents with responsibility. Fair to all
three parties.

Not really. In such a situation, a baby would be given up for adoption.
The unwanted kid gets the absolute worst of it. He is usually condemned to
grow up in foster care, while the adults go on with their lives. The woman
has to deal with the physical repurcussions of pregnancy and childbirth.
The man has to deal with...nothing. His life is as it was before. Nothing
has changed.

If the child is relinquished for adoption, he or she will be highly unlikely to
be in foster care. Foster care kids nearly always are *unrelinquished* children
who are wards of the state due to having been removed from their homes. Indeed,
it's hesitancy to terminate parental rights that keeps them there.

If in that particular case the man gets off 'scot-free', at least the other
parties have their choices and their lives. This isn't about making sure
everyone is punished, at the least I don't think that is the most important
thing. And no, folks aren't obliged to make the post-facto decisions that
would get him out of a fix he's gotten into. Any more than they would be in any
other area of life. The woman, whatever she does (abortion, adoption,
childrearing), is surely impacted.

I see the reasonableness of allowing the woman, having gone through pregnancy
and childbirth, to be the one to make the decision to relinquish the child
unilaterally. Possibly, unless the father steps forward and shows that he can
and will take care of the child.

There's no *perfect* solution here - it's very simply biologically different and
unequal between the genders from the get go. We being mammals and all ;-)

But I don't recognize any solution as reasonable that compromises greater
principles just to let folks scramble post facto out of preventable situations
they've gotten themselves into. And that goes for both genders.

Banty