communicating with partner about having children

Well we have always wanted children. I would say hunny I think it is time
and he would say not right now. Then when I got pregnant the first time I
said to him how would you feel if I was pregnant? He said that if I was he
would be happy. That's is when I said that I was. He was excited. (then
we ended up loosing the baby) We did decide after that then when it
happens it happens.

We always knew that we wanted more then one child so we discussed trying for
the next one after a year.

Kay
Eva 9/2002
little boy 1/2005

"Abi" wrote in message
om...
Hi,
I just wanted to know from other ladies who have had kids - how did
you discuss when and whether to have children with your partner? Was
it you who came up with the idea first and then led the way into ttc
so to speak - or did your dh come up with the idea first? Was your dh
generally into the idea but wanted to wait a lot longer than you? Did
many of you actually deliberately try to conceive (by modifying
behaviour, planning ovulation dates etc etc) and or did you just throw
away the contraception and see what happened?
If you already had one child, how did you discuss the possibility of
having another child?
thanks!

"Abi" wrote in message
om...
Hi,
I just wanted to know from other ladies who have had kids - how did
you discuss when and whether to have children with your partner?

Before we decided to get engaged... He was lukewarm on the notion but not
100% opposed. It would have been a deal-breaker for me for him to not want
kids. However, he's only committed to one, and fairly opposed to any after
the one I'm pg with. At this point, I'm not sure I disagree with him--I just
flat out do NOT like the process of pregnancy.

But we knew not only *that* we would have a child together, but
approximately when (and my due date is about a month off of our "guess" of
when our child would be born from our pre-engagement discussions.)

Seriously--I would NOT have married him if he'd been adamant about no kids.

Jenrose

As to actually deciding as to when to conceive... I started trying nine
months before he did. (He had somehow failed to notice that we were no
longer using condoms and I was taking folic acid.)


I told dh that I'd have the IUD taken out spring of 2004, but didn't tell
him I'd actually done it until it had been out for, oh, weeks, I think. That
was his preference--he was worried that if he knew we were ttc, it would
impair his performance. Ultimately, it didn't at all, as he knew full well I
was fertile both times we got pg this year.

Heh. Then again, I do know how to push his buttons. g

Jenrose

"Jenrose" wrote in message
news:1099905308.f5TFx1GkVg8MR2AfhRnC8g@teranews...

Seriously--I would NOT have married him if he'd been adamant about no
kids.

Jenrose



Yep, me either with my dh. I would have stopped dating him immediately if
he said he didn't want kids. That was one of the non-negotiable issues.
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys, 1/3/03
Addison Grace, 9/30/04

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Zannah wrote in message ...

snip

As to actually deciding as to when to conceive... I started trying nine
months before he did. (He had somehow failed to notice that we were no
longer using condoms and I was taking folic acid.)

Zannah.

Now see you had me until this last paragraph Just goes to show that
all relationships are different -- this would have *never* flown with
my husband!

Elle

On 8 Nov 2004 18:32:31 -0800, (Elle) wrote:

Zannah wrote in message ...

As to actually deciding as to when to conceive... I started trying nine
months before he did. (He had somehow failed to notice that we were no
longer using condoms and I was taking folic acid.)

Zannah.

Now see you had me until this last paragraph Just goes to show that
all relationships are different -- this would have *never* flown with
my husband!

Mine either. He would have been very upset because he would have felt
that I was trying to "force" him into having a baby.

--
Daye

In article ,
Daye wrote:

On 8 Nov 2004 18:32:31 -0800, (Elle) wrote:

Zannah wrote in message
...

As to actually deciding as to when to conceive... I started trying nine
months before he did. (He had somehow failed to notice that we were no
longer using condoms and I was taking folic acid.)

Zannah.

Now see you had me until this last paragraph Just goes to show that
all relationships are different -- this would have *never* flown with
my husband!

Mine either. He would have been very upset because he would have felt
that I was trying to "force" him into having a baby.

We'd discussed having children soon, but hadn't specifically said "let's
start RIGHT now". I kind of assumed he was ok with this, based on the
fact HE was no longer using contraception. (Honestly, it wasn't like I
ripping the condoms off the man while he wasn't paying attention.)

Zannah.

Zannah wrote:

(Honestly, it wasn't like I
ripping the condoms off the man while he wasn't paying attention.)

Zannah.

LOL this makes for a *very* interesting mental picture!

-Rebecca, not quite awake yet