feel like in a trap

highInflation wrote:
Hey guys,

My relationship with wife is getting worse.
We got married on in feb 2006 and had our daughter in sep 2006. I
didn't wanted to have a child, but during sex she held me tight before
i can take it out ( I know I am at fault too) and we had our daughter,
I love my daughter but we were not ready for a baby.
She doesn't like to work, she has a loan (which I am paying, $300/
month) , she doesn't like to clean the house, all day she sits and
talks on the phone. If we have a argument, she shouts so loud the
whole neighborhood can hear.

How can I get out of this without getting ripped off?
I know I am at fault too, but i am working my ass off and she is
sitting at home talking all day. if I get the phone disconnected, she
will shout. I don't like shouting and lot of times I put up with her
just to keep her quiet.
I think she has problems but she doesn't admit it.


Well, you had one chance to get yourself out of the mess that was child
support, but on her side, she had two.
I'd start documenting how long she has been unemployed and get ready for
divorce. When you file, you're probably going to have to ask yourself
which is more expensive: filing for sole custody and fighting to get it,
filing for joint custody and hoping the courts don't order child support
"to even things out economically", or just pay child support.
Do you have any neighbors that will testify to the fact that they've
heard her sceaming? Most of the time it's a no fault divorce, but if you
can prove she has anger problems, which it sounds like it does.
Finally, and I say this in all honesty, I'd do some housecleaning since
she hasn't been at it and try to find your balls. It may seem easier to
let her get her way, but all it does is enable her. Make a good stand
and keep on it. Don't back off after a day or two of bitching. You'll
find that the next time it's half as hard as the first time you put down
your foot, and so on. Works with kids, works with people with the
maturity of kids.

On Mar 24, 3:23 pm, "Chris" wrote:
" wrote in message

oups.com...



On Mar 24, 12:20 pm, "DB" wrote:
" wrote in

Then you'll be a happy man - forever. Do it wrong and you'll live in
misery for the next 20+ years.

Yes, i'm afraid it doesn't pay to be a nice guy when concidering
separation!

WHen he does leave, make sure all the paperwork is in place so when the
cops
don't arrest him for kidnapping!

You've bought up another misconception. As long as his wife hasn't
applied for custody he is perfectly within the law to just pick up his
child and walk out. The cops can't touch him.

All she has to do is tell the police that he is a danger to the child and
they will AUTOMATICALLY grant immediate custody to the mother!



If a mother can just pick up the kids and walk out, so can a father.

Think about it - you can't kidnap your own child.

Cheers

Ino Paycs
http://inopaycs.tripod.com


Immediate custody? I've never heard of such a thing. I have always
assumed that a judge was the only person who could hand down a custody
order. And that would be after a few weeks (or more) of waiting to get
into a court session.

I can maybe imagine the police giving the mother something like
"immediate possession" (if that word exists in the law books) if the
child were in danger.

But if the child is safe with its grandmother and father in a
repectable home, ther e is nothing the police can do. Mothers don't
own children, or do they now?

Ino

" wrote in message
oups.com...
On Mar 24, 3:23 pm, "Chris" wrote:
" wrote in message

oups.com...



On Mar 24, 12:20 pm, "DB" wrote:
" wrote in

Then you'll be a happy man - forever. Do it wrong and you'll live
in
misery for the next 20+ years.

Yes, i'm afraid it doesn't pay to be a nice guy when concidering
separation!

WHen he does leave, make sure all the paperwork is in place so when
the
cops
don't arrest him for kidnapping!

You've bought up another misconception. As long as his wife hasn't
applied for custody he is perfectly within the law to just pick up his
child and walk out. The cops can't touch him.

All she has to do is tell the police that he is a danger to the child
and
they will AUTOMATICALLY grant immediate custody to the mother!



If a mother can just pick up the kids and walk out, so can a father.

Think about it - you can't kidnap your own child.

Cheers

Ino Paycs
http://inopaycs.tripod.com


Immediate custody? I've never heard of such a thing. I have always
assumed that a judge was the only person who could hand down a custody
order. And that would be after a few weeks (or more) of waiting to get
into a court session.

I can maybe imagine the police giving the mother something like
"immediate possession" (if that word exists in the law books) if the
child were in danger.

But if the child is safe with its grandmother and father in a
repectable home, ther e is nothing the police can do. Mothers don't
own children, or do they now?

According to the government people they do! And the police can snatch a
child from ANYWHERE.

"Immediate possession", "immediate custody", what's the difference. Bottom
line: the police allow the mother to keep the child away from the father.
Now you know why women use the police for custody; it's much quicker than
using a judge. In fact, it's instantaneous!

One last note: If a cop grants custody to the mother and she murders the
child, odds are his action will never even be mentioned. But if he gave the
child to the father and the father murdered said child, .............. well,
you know the rest.


Ino