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#21
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Marie wrote:
On Sat, 18 Jun 2005 12:05:51 -0400, Jeanne wrote: What I saw was a caring, intelligent woman who was good with toddlers and preschoolers. The pierced eyebrow was pretty much equivalent a non-issue. It *is* kind of silly to judge someone based on appearance. Especially for something that's becoming so common, such as piercings and tattoos. It would never occur to me to question someone's abilities or professionalism because of what they wear, either. Marie One of my DDs has had piercings including a belly button one. I think she's also got a tattoo and I think my SIL (her husband) has one too. Both of them are professional people. I don't know if dd had a tongue piercing or not - I vaguely remember her saying that she had a lot of trouble with one piercing and let it close up because it kept getting infected. She and SIL thought we'd disapprove, so they initially hid the piercings etc from us. AFAIK, I never had any stated position on tattoos or piercings, so I don't think they did it to rebel - and in any case my dd and SIL are in their early 40s. DS and his children visited this week, and I see that my grandson has a pierced ear. DS had one too when he was in school. |
#22
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In article .com,
"grandma Rosalie" wrote: One of my DDs has had piercings including a belly button one. I think she's also got a tattoo and I think my SIL (her husband) has one too. Both of them are professional people. I don't know if dd had a tongue piercing or not - I vaguely remember her saying that she had a lot of trouble with one piercing and let it close up because it kept getting infected. More likely the belly button, which tend to be the higher problem ones. Tongue piercings are some with the least problems with infections. (I know WAY more than I want to about various body art issues. . .) -- Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care |
#24
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In article .com,
"shinypenny" wrote: Am I being too melodramatic here? Am I missing something? And, most importantly, am I doomed to have my girls get tongue studs because it's the one thing that would accomplish shock value for me? :-) Yes, you're being too melodramatic. It's a fashion statement. While it MAY (and I emphasize MAY) have had it's beginnings in issues dealing with sexuality. it is, at this point in time, merely a fashion statement. Remember when a man with one ear pierced was supposed to be advertising that he was gay (only specifically WHICH ear seemed to vary from one area to another . . .) Body art is just body art. I'd be concerned if a minor came home with ANY piercings or tatoos, since, at least here in CA (and I think in most other states) they need parental permission for that sort of thing -- and, since they are more or less permanent, I would NOT sign permission for anything but ears. However, once the kids are old enough to sign for themselves, attributing the body art to sexual proclivities is over the top. (And, if I'm any indication -- yes, the fact that you are grossed out by that ONE THING, means your daughters will get them done as soon as they can . . . it's about the only (visible) piercing that grosses me out, though I'm not crazy about the lips, either. As far as the ones not normally visible, well, I don't need to know if they've done any of that! They've not bothered with tatoos (they don't bother me) or any other facial piercings -- just the one that they knew grossed me out.) -- Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care |
#25
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shinypenny wrote:
If my DD's came home with one, I'd be seriously worried. Because, to my knowledge, the tongue piercing is not meant for fashion. It's meant as an aid for performing oral sex. From what I gather, those that wear it outside the bedroom, are conveying their interest and skill in this activity. Now, if a person finds a tongue stud useful in their private sexual practices, that's no sweat off my brow - enjoy. But to wear it outside of the bedroom and walk around in public? Uh uh. Ummmmm..... no. tongue piercing is just like any other piercing in that it's a fashion statement and self expression. It's not a "come hither; I give good head" statement. (that's like saying wearing a sexy outfit is only meant as a come-one) Does it help with oral sex? Possibly, but the people I've known who got them did for a whole bunch of reasons, and in most cases that wasn't even part of their consideration. Besides, they close up too easily to go without very often. If you took it out EVERY time you went in public, you might as well give up the piercing entirely. I believe some people have clear ones they can use in public, though. Cathy Weeks |
#26
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In article . com,
"Cathy Weeks" wrote: shinypenny wrote: If my DD's came home with one, I'd be seriously worried. Because, to my knowledge, the tongue piercing is not meant for fashion. It's meant as an aid for performing oral sex. From what I gather, those that wear it outside the bedroom, are conveying their interest and skill in this activity. Now, if a person finds a tongue stud useful in their private sexual practices, that's no sweat off my brow - enjoy. But to wear it outside of the bedroom and walk around in public? Uh uh. Ummmmm..... no. tongue piercing is just like any other piercing in that it's a fashion statement and self expression. It's not a "come hither; I give good head" statement. (that's like saying wearing a sexy outfit is only meant as a come-one) Does it help with oral sex? Possibly, but the people I've known who got them did for a whole bunch of reasons, and in most cases that wasn't even part of their consideration. I have to admit that if that WAS one of my daughters' considerations, they probably would not have shared that information with me. However, I HAVE talked to others about why they did that (as well as some others; nipple piercings, in particular) -- and it seems to generally be just a fashion statement. Sometimes, it has clearly been done to annoy a parent -- but most often, just because. Besides, they close up too easily to go without very often. If you took it out EVERY time you went in public, you might as well give up the piercing entirely. I believe some people have clear ones they can use in public, though. Cathy Weeks -- Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care |
#27
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Mary wrote:
Have any of you faced a teacher, preschool or otherwise that dressed inappropriately? Recently, I experienced a situation with "teachers" (they were actually college students doing a summer intern-job) that wore low ride, cotton, white, mini skirts, with no slips (do people still wear slips?). One has a tongue stud. Both wore shirts with their belly buttons exposed. It is a delicate situation in that I am related to the owner. I did say something to the owner, but then let the subject die. I can say that husband is eager to drive my daughters to the school! In a previous preschool, the teachers had tattoos, but they covered them up. I have a tattoo as well, but if I was in a professional situation, I would cover it up. Hmm...I'm a little surprised by the responses. I sit on the board of a preschool. From my perspective, the tongue piercing is not an issue, as long as it's not being fiddled with all the time. However, while we do not have a detailed dress code, it doesn't particularly sound like the above described attire would be acceptable at our school. We expect the teachers to be in clothes that they can get down on the floor with the kids, or run and play with the kids. I don't really see how a mini skirt fits that bill (as I imagine they're not wearing bloomers ;-) Even college students helping out in the school would be expected to show up dressed appropriately--clean, neat, and ready for play. We sometime have teens or college age folks helping out a bit, and their dress does tend to be a bit less conservative than the older women (which is fine), but if you can't sit cross-legged on the floor or reach your arms over your head without exposing something you shouldn't, I think our Director would suggest a change of clothing would be in order. Best wishes, Ericka |
#28
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"Nan" wrote in message ... On 17 Jun 2005 19:43:46 -0700, "Mary" wrote: Yep. At my dd's preschool the "Stay and Play" gals all dressed this way. They're not "teachers", but they are the daycare workers. It never occurred to me to be bothered by it, as they're great with all the kids, and that is what I feel is important, not how they're dressed. I think most of us would have a line that we wouldn't want our DCPs to cross. Would you object to someone with a violent t-shirt, or one of those shirts with snakes coming through the eye sockets of a skull? I would -- I'd be afraid that the images would be upsetting to my child. How about profanity? I'd be upset by that as well, even if my child was too young to read it or know what it meant. What if they worked in a bikini? Or if they were male and generally worked without a shirt? That's fine for the pool, but doesn't seem right for a pre-school environment. Heck -- what if they were nudists? The OP seems upset with the sexual nature of the dress of the Day Care workers. Sure she could change day cares. But if she's been happy with it otherwise, don't you think it's appropriate for her to address the situation with the owner? I do. If the owner refuses to do anything about it, then the OP needs to decide whether or not it's something worth switching over. And for whoever said that it's too much to expect the college girls to purchase a professional wardrobe for a summer job -- I think "professional" in this case really only means modest. A few t-shirts that cover their bellies and so forth. It is a delicate situation in that I am related to the owner. I did say something to the owner, but then let the subject die. I can say that husband is eager to drive my daughters to the school! So, are you insecure? I wouldn't be bothered by my husband looking at the gals at our school. She made one joking comment about her husband, and everyone jumps all over it! She never said that bothered her, nor that she had any trust issues or other problems with her husband. Bizby |
#29
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"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message ... Hmm...I'm a little surprised by the responses. I sit on the board of a preschool. [snip] if you can't sit cross-legged on the floor or reach your arms over your head without exposing something you shouldn't, I think our Director would suggest a change of clothing would be in order. Best wishes, Ericka Thank you Ericka -- I was feeling a bit alone. :-) Bizby |
#30
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On Sat, 18 Jun 2005 14:29:37 -0400, "bizby40"
wrote: "Nan" wrote in message .. . On 17 Jun 2005 19:43:46 -0700, "Mary" wrote: Yep. At my dd's preschool the "Stay and Play" gals all dressed this way. They're not "teachers", but they are the daycare workers. It never occurred to me to be bothered by it, as they're great with all the kids, and that is what I feel is important, not how they're dressed. I think most of us would have a line that we wouldn't want our DCPs to cross. Would you object to someone with a violent t-shirt, or one of those shirts with snakes coming through the eye sockets of a skull? I would -- I'd be afraid that the images would be upsetting to my child. How about profanity? I'd be upset by that as well, even if my child was too young to read it or know what it meant. What if they worked in a bikini? Or if they were male and generally worked without a shirt? That's fine for the pool, but doesn't seem right for a pre-school environment. Heck -- what if they were nudists? Yeah. Of course you can stretch it beyond comprehension to think we'd include all manner of dress. /rolls eyes However, I was addressing her issue with showing a belly, or wearing a mini skirt. That's a pretty far cry from violent images or a nudist, doncha think? The OP seems upset with the sexual nature of the dress of the Day Care workers. Sure she could change day cares. But if she's been happy with it otherwise, don't you think it's appropriate for her to address the situation with the owner? I do. If the owner refuses to do anything about it, then the OP needs to decide whether or not it's something worth switching over. Yup, and she did address it and let it drop. Apparently the owner isn't bothered as much as she is, or changes would have already been made, and she wouldn't need to vent about it here. She would do what she needs to, to feel more comfortable. And for whoever said that it's too much to expect the college girls to purchase a professional wardrobe for a summer job -- I think "professional" in this case really only means modest. A few t-shirts that cover their bellies and so forth. It is a delicate situation in that I am related to the owner. I did say something to the owner, but then let the subject die. I can say that husband is eager to drive my daughters to the school! So, are you insecure? I wouldn't be bothered by my husband looking at the gals at our school. She made one joking comment about her husband, and everyone jumps all over it! She never said that bothered her, nor that she had any trust issues or other problems with her husband. She's obviously bothered by the way they dress as being too sexual. Mentioning her husband just adds fuel to that fire. Nan |
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