need to vent - Social rejection to BF

I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

Everyone was real happy when I BF for the first 8 months but I am
starting to get resistance from everyone around me. BF my child to me
has been the most wonderful experice, better than child birth itself,
and I really do not want to stop. I am down to 3 feedings a day
(basically breakfast, lunch and dinner) and I do give her one feeding
of formula during the time that I am not at home, only 6oz somewhat of
a snak.

As I said, I am starting to get resistance everywhere. My husband
thinks I am exagerating, but does support me in whatever my desicion
is.

Many people say that BM is no good after 8months or that it looses its
nutritional value, but I just cannot see how Cow's milk is better for
my child at any age, Cow's milk must also be less nutritional after a
certian period, and who know how long each cow is being milked.
Others say that it is psicologically bad for kids to BF once they
become concious, my doctor says that after a year the kid is not going
to want to eat other things and is only going to want BM and that it
will be emarasing for me when she pulls up my shirt in public to feed.


I live in Ecuador, third world country, you would think peoplo are pro
BF, but no, many mothers go direct to formula and never BF, Some of my
friends think that it is the poor people that BF until 2 and 3 years
becuase they are poor and cannot afford to buymilk. They compare me
with the Indians around here that carry their babies on slings all day.
I say that is so much bull, I can definetly afford the milk, but I
simply prefer to feed my child the real thing.

Anyway, I am going to have to put up with all these coments, I really
do not care but it does anoy me somewhat that I know everyone is
talking behind my back saying how exagerated I am.

Jenny

Jenny wrote:

Many people say that BM is no good after 8months or that it looses its
nutritional value

That's a myth. The nutrition is less important for babies once they're
having other foods, but the milk itself is still nutritious. The
antibodies in it actually become more concentrated as time goes on. The
American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that breastmilk should be the
main source of nutrition for the first year and, after that,
breastfeeding should continue as long as both mother and baby desire it.

, but I just cannot see how Cow's milk is better for
my child at any age, Cow's milk must also be less nutritional after a
certian period, and who know how long each cow is being milked.

Good point!

Others say that it is psicologically bad for kids to BF once they
become concious

Funny how that doesn't seem to affect children in all the societies in
the world where breastfeeding past a year is considered normal.

, my doctor says that after a year the kid is not going
to want to eat other things and is only going to want BM and that it
will be emarasing for me when she pulls up my shirt in public to feed.

Yeah, like you couldn't decide for yourself what you would or wouldn't
find embarrassing.


Nil illegitimi carborundorum. Good luck!


All the best,

Sarah
--
http://www.goodenoughmummy.typepad.com

"That which can be destroyed by the truth, should be" - P. C. Hodgell

Jenny wrote:
I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

Everyone was real happy when I BF for the first 8 months but I am
starting to get resistance from everyone around me. BF my child to me
has been the most wonderful experice, better than child birth itself,
and I really do not want to stop. I am down to 3 feedings a day
(basically breakfast, lunch and dinner) and I do give her one feeding
of formula during the time that I am not at home, only 6oz somewhat of
a snak.

As I said, I am starting to get resistance everywhere. My husband
thinks I am exagerating, but does support me in whatever my desicion
is.

Many people say that BM is no good after 8months or that it looses its
nutritional value, but I just cannot see how Cow's milk is better for
my child at any age, Cow's milk must also be less nutritional after a
certian period, and who know how long each cow is being milked.
Others say that it is psicologically bad for kids to BF once they
become concious, my doctor says that after a year the kid is not going
to want to eat other things and is only going to want BM and that it
will be emarasing for me when she pulls up my shirt in public to feed.


I live in Ecuador, third world country, you would think peoplo are pro
BF, but no, many mothers go direct to formula and never BF, Some of my
friends think that it is the poor people that BF until 2 and 3 years
becuase they are poor and cannot afford to buymilk. They compare me
with the Indians around here that carry their babies on slings all day.
I say that is so much bull, I can definetly afford the milk, but I
simply prefer to feed my child the real thing.

This explains it. I've not been to Ecuador but have found this attitude
elsewhere in the developing world - Breastfeeding is often considered
'what the peasants do' and as a result it is frowned upon. Fortunately
in some countries there's been a push by the health organizations,
using local celebrities to encourage breastfeeding. I'm sorry Ecuador
is not among them.

I am sure you are not exaggerating, and I'm sorry you're facing
resistance. Remind anyone and everyone, including your doctor, that the
World Health Organization (www.who.int) recommends breastfeeding for at
least *2 years*.

You might also tell those people who disparage the Indians with their
babies in slings that in the US it is predominantly educated, upper
middle class women who not only breastfeed for extended periods, but
also use slings!

Anyway, I am going to have to put up with all these coments, I really
do not care but it does anoy me somewhat that I know everyone is
talking behind my back saying how exagerated I am.

Hang in there! You can be an example to other women.

Jenny wrote:


I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

I'm so sorry! You know what you're doing is right, do your best to
ignore them. If it helps, just keep telling yourself that their
attitudes are *ignorant* and that you know better. Plus you can always
tell them that BF makes babies smarter.

Keep up the good work!
--
Cheri Stryker

mom to DS1 - 7 yrs, and DS2 - 5 months

Check out my new breastfeeding T-shirts on CafePress!
http://www.cafepress.com/dancingbones

Jenny wrote:

my doctor says that after a year the kid is not going
to want to eat other things and is only going to want BM and that it
will be emarasing for me when she pulls up my shirt in public to feed.

Oh, that's just nonsense. My son turned three in March, and he still
nurses, though he's been gradually self-weaning to the point that he's
nursing roughly 1x every other or every third day. And he's had no trouble
whatsoever eating a varied, balanced diet. He also never pulls my shirt up
in public--he never has, either. He doesn't even ask to nurse when we're
out and about, and hasn't for a very long time.

--
Belphoebe

Jenny wrote:

I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

I'm sorry to hear this. I'm happily breastfeeding
my 14-month-old and I BF-ed my DS#1 for 17 months.

Many people say that BM is no good after 8months or that it looses its
nutritional value, but I just cannot see how Cow's milk is better for
my child at any age,

Not to mention, cow's milk is NOT NOT NOT a
substitute for breastmilk. Breastmilk is a
complete food for baby humans. When baby humans
stop drinking breastmilk, they should be eating
a well-balanced diet, and cow's milk can be part
of it or not.

When baby cows stop drinking cow's milk, they
eat grass.

become concious, my doctor says that after a year the kid is not going
to want to eat other things and is only going to want BM

Hmm, so how does your doctor explain all the
societies in which breastfeeding continues
well into the toddler years, but, oh gosh,
the babies grow up to eat food...?

I say that is so much bull, I can definetly afford the milk, but I
simply prefer to feed my child the real thing.

Not only is it the real thing, but it's the
best thing. Keep at it!

-- Anita --

"Jenny" wrote in message
ups.com...


I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

The ignorance you're dealing with is not uncommon, but you're absolutely
right in thinking that continuing to breastfeed is the best for your child.
It's a huge investment in your daughter's health - it is thought that a
breastfed baby in the lowest socio-economic group is healthier than the
formula-fed child of a millionaire - you just can't put a price on
breastmilk.

Have you looked at some of the sites around with information about
breastfeeding and extended nursing? They may be of help to you, but you
could share them with your friends - not that they'll probably want to hear
it, if they've chosen to formula feed, but it may get them off your back.
The World Health Organisation recommend breastfeeding to the age of two and
beyond. www.kellymom.com has some good resources, as does the La Leche
League International site www.lalecheleague.org , ProMom has a list of 101
reasons to breastfeed http://www.promom.org/101/index.html , www.007b.com
also has a section on breastfeeding.
The internet is literally teeming with information to back up your arguments
;-)

And you've come to the right place for support...

--
Amy
Mum to Carlos born sleeping 20/11/02,
& Ana born screaming 30/06/04
http://www.freewebs.com/carlos2002/
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/ana%5Fj%5F2004/
My blog: http://spaces.msn.com/members/querer-hijo-querer-hija/

In article . com,
"Jenny" wrote:

I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

Just tell them you know this Australian woman on the Internet whose
five-year-old still frequently has breast milk at bedtime. And he reads and
writes like an eight-year-old. (Strange but true: highly intelligent
children are more likely to have parents who practiced child-led weaning.)

In Australian culture it is bad to be an interfering busybody, and "Mind your
own business!" is a strong rebuke. I hope you can find some way of telling
these other people to stop interfering!

--
Chookie -- Sydney, Australia
(Replace "foulspambegone" with "optushome" to reply)

"Parenthood is like the modern stone washing process for denim jeans. You may
start out crisp, neat and tough, but you end up pale, limp and wrinkled."
Kerry Cue

Jenny,

A couple of (supportive) comments...

Regarding duration of breastfeeding: You can tell them thet WHO
(the World Health Organizatio) recommends breastfeeding for AT
LEAST two years. You can tell them that it is not just a third
world thing; the Canadiian Pediatric Association recommends bf
for two years, and the US American Association of Pediatricians
encourages bf two years, and these are the two richest countirues
in your hemisphere.

Second regarding support from your husband. You need to have a
private talk with him and tell him how important it is to you to
have him support you when you are attacked on this issue by
others.

Third, regarding how good breastmilk is (beyond 8 months): You
can tell them that second year milk has twice the antibodies of
first year milk, that a childs immune system is not developed yet,
and there is NOTHING in formula to compare to it. Babies who
continue to breastfeed for two years are less likely to contract
childhood diseases, and if they do the diseases are milder.

Fourth, regarding social development: Studies has also found that
children who breastfeed for two years are more indedendent and
self reliant than those who were weaned at one year. You can alsio
state that their IQ's are, on average, 3 to 5 points higher.

Or, you can just ignore them and go about your business. :-)

Good luck,
Larry

Jenny writes:

: I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
: month old.

: Everyone was real happy when I BF for the first 8 months but I am
: starting to get resistance from everyone around me. BF my child to me
: has been the most wonderful experice, better than child birth itself,
: and I really do not want to stop. I am down to 3 feedings a day
: (basically breakfast, lunch and dinner) and I do give her one feeding
: of formula during the time that I am not at home, only 6oz somewhat of
: a snak.

: As I said, I am starting to get resistance everywhere. My husband
: thinks I am exagerating, but does support me in whatever my desicion
: is.

: Many people say that BM is no good after 8months or that it looses its
: nutritional value, but I just cannot see how Cow's milk is better for
: my child at any age, Cow's milk must also be less nutritional after a
: certian period, and who know how long each cow is being milked.
: Others say that it is psicologically bad for kids to BF once they
: become concious, my doctor says that after a year the kid is not going
: to want to eat other things and is only going to want BM and that it
: will be emarasing for me when she pulls up my shirt in public to feed.


: I live in Ecuador, third world country, you would think peoplo are pro
: BF, but no, many mothers go direct to formula and never BF, Some of my
: friends think that it is the poor people that BF until 2 and 3 years
: becuase they are poor and cannot afford to buymilk. They compare me
: with the Indians around here that carry their babies on slings all day.
: I say that is so much bull, I can definetly afford the milk, but I
: simply prefer to feed my child the real thing.

: Anyway, I am going to have to put up with all these coments, I really
: do not care but it does anoy me somewhat that I know everyone is
: talking behind my back saying how exagerated I am.

: Jenny

Jenny wrote:

I am having somewhat of a hard time socialy continuing to BF my 11
month old.

Hi Jenny

I'm sorry you're having a rough time with the people around them, but
remember it's your choice not theirs, and I happen to think it's the
right choice! Good for you for continuing, despite what they think -
maybe it will help educate those that are ignorant around you, and your
example will help other babies in your community be breastfed - even if
it doesn't, at least your baby is getting a great start!

Keep going! You don't have to justify doing the right thing to anyone.

Lucy