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Emotional Instability?



 
 
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  #1  
Old May 5th 04, 07:40 PM
biotechboy
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Default Emotional Instability?

I have a question that I hope one of you may be able to answer. My
wife is approx 2.5 to 3 mos. pregnant. In early January she
miscarried. Since learning of this new pregnancy she has become an
absolute terror to live with. She's making accusations of me that are
completely untrue. She is finding the most mediocre things to get
angry about and then blowing them up into a full scale screaming match
that lasts for days. Yesterday she started throwing things at me until
I finally just had to leave the house and go to a movie. I've been
sleeping on the couch for a week and, frankly, I'm tired of it. I try
to be as understanding as I can, it's just so damn difficult dealing
with the irrationality of this. Does anyone have any advice? Please
post here, my email is fake. Thanks in advance....
  #2  
Old May 5th 04, 07:50 PM
Crystal Dreamer
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Default Emotional Instability?

biotechboy wrote:
I have a question that I hope one of you may be able to answer. My
wife is approx 2.5 to 3 mos. pregnant. In early January she
miscarried. Since learning of this new pregnancy she has become an
absolute terror to live with. She's making accusations of me that are
completely untrue. She is finding the most mediocre things to get
angry about and then blowing them up into a full scale screaming match
that lasts for days. Yesterday she started throwing things at me until
I finally just had to leave the house and go to a movie. I've been
sleeping on the couch for a week and, frankly, I'm tired of it. I try
to be as understanding as I can, it's just so damn difficult dealing
with the irrationality of this. Does anyone have any advice? Please
post here, my email is fake. Thanks in advance....


How far along was she when she miscarried? Several things could be
happening. I'm sure that she is very stressed out and worried about an
impending doom with this pregnancy. If she's at the same point she lost her
last baby, that's a huge part of it. She may even be feeling a bit of guilt
over being pregnant again.

Try to talk with her about your concerns. Ask her about her feelings with
the current pregnancy, as well as the miscarriage. It sounds like she
didn't have enough time to grieve. I'm sure I was hard to live with after
our daughter was stillborn, but so thankful that my husband stuck it out.
Although he didn't show his grief, I laid mine out for the whole world to
see, and frankly, I feel better for doing it.

If you think that she is emotionally unstable, how about attending a support
group, or go to a counseling session with her. I know it might be hard for
you, but please try to be supportive of her. I wish you the best!



  #3  
Old May 5th 04, 10:19 PM
Donna Metler
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Default Emotional Instability?

I'm currently 6 weeks into a pregnancy after delivering prematurely and
losing my first baby at 22 weeks gestation. Pregnancy after you've lost one
baby is a totally different ballgame than a regular pregnancy. Everything
under the sun makes you just so nervous and paranoid, people are telling you
to relax and enjoy it, and all you can think about is "what if the worst
happens". There's also guilt involved-what am I doing having another baby
when I couldn't take care of the first one? In a first trimester
miscarriage, often mothers are given NO support whatsoever, because it is
such a medical non-event, but it's emotionally still quite traumatic for
many women.

If there is a pregnancy loss support group or a PAILS (Pregnancy after
infant loss support) group in your area, it might really help her. In
addition, she may still be dealing with some hormonal swings from losing the
first pregnancy, as well as the second pregnancy-I had major hormonal swings
until about 2 months past my due date.

Can you go with her to her next OB appointment? That would be the first step
in getting her some help and support.

Good luck. I'm sure this is frustrating and impossible for you!


 




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