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15 month screaming
My 15 month son is generally a very mellow kid. Recently he has begun
screaming/screeching at near the top of his lungs. My wife and I believe he is frustrated because he is talking/babbling but not easily understood and looking for attention (hard to believe he needs more than he gets) so we try to ignore it to the best of our ability. Unfortunately it can not be ignored for too long because it is REALLY LOUD! We try to divert his attention which does work temporarily but the screaming starts soon after. Any ideas on how to tame the screeching? Neil R |
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"Neil Rutman" wrote in
: My 15 month son is generally a very mellow kid. Recently he has begun screaming/screeching at near the top of his lungs. My wife and I believe he is frustrated because he is talking/babbling but not easily understood and looking for attention (hard to believe he needs more than he gets) so we try to ignore it to the best of our ability. Unfortunately it can not be ignored for too long because it is REALLY LOUD! We try to divert his attention which does work temporarily but the screaming starts soon after. Any ideas on how to tame the screeching? teach him sign language. seriously. request he use indoor voice & reward him when he does. the hard part is ignoring the screeching, but if you tell him 'indoor voice' when he starts & refuse to acknowlege him when he's loud, he will get the hint fairly quickly. ear plugs help with the ignoring part i'm kidding) lee |
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"Neil Rutman" wrote in message ... My 15 month son is generally a very mellow kid. ... Any ideas on how to tame the screeching? Neil R Sign language is a very good thing... it also helps later on in noisy situations. Also, he may also have some tooth coming in that is painful. You may want to try cold things... like a wet wash cloth left in the freezer for a while. And this: http://signwithme.com/video_display.asp?ID=180 |
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enigma ) writes: teach him sign language. seriously. Good idea! ear plugs help with the ignoring part i'm kidding) lee Ear plugs are also a good idea! I'm not kidding!! -- Cathy A *much* better world is possible. |
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"Neil Rutman" ) writes: My 15 month son is generally a very mellow kid. Recently he has begun screaming/screeching at near the top of his lungs. My wife and I believe he is frustrated because he is talking/babbling but not easily understood and looking for attention (hard to believe he needs more than he gets) so we try to ignore it to the best of our ability. Unfortunately it can not be ignored for too long because it is REALLY LOUD! We try to divert his attention which does work temporarily but the screaming starts soon after. Any ideas on how to tame the screeching? Neil R In my opinion, if you want to teach a little kid not to scream (or whine, or pull all the books off the shelves, etc.), then the very worst thing you can do is to ignore the behaviour for a few minutes while it gets more and more intense and then give in and give the kid attention when it gets extremely loud. If you do that, the kid will learn to get louder and louder and to keep it up for longer and longer periods of being ignored. If you're going to give in, I suggest giving in immediately: giving him attention as soon as he begins to scream. If you begin to ignore him, then it's important to continue ignoring him until he stops screaming (at least as far as teaching him not to scream. There could be other important reasons to pay attention to him when he screams!!!!) After he has stopped screaming you can give him attention. It's not easy!! Little kids feel a need, or at least an extremely strong urge, for very large amounts of attention. A little kid may try very hard to get 100% of your attention 100% of the time. That's the way they are. One of the ways to help avoid screaming and similar behaviour, if it's motivated by wanting attention, is to give him lots and lots of attention, all the time or almost all the time. You can think of nice ways he can ask for attention, and when he does those things (e.g. pull on your arm, make a little sound etc.) then drop everything and give him attention immediately. You don't have to even wait for him to ask -- you can just give him attention all the time or almost all the time. Note that he may still urgently want attention for that last bit of time even if you give him attention almost all the time. That's just normal for that age. Or on the other hand, he may feel satisfied and play with toys by himself for 2 minutes occasionally or something. You can give him focussed attention for one or more periods of time every day, perhaps on a schedule rather than waiting for him to ask, and you can also find ways to give him some attention while you're doing other things, e.g. saying nursery rhymes while you do the dishes and carrying him around in a backpack etc. You can try to give him the feeling that he's communicating. When he tries to talk, you can try to guess what he might be trying to say. You can reply. You can have the sort of conversation deaf older relatives sometimes have: "Will we see you next Thursday?" "Yes, I think we need some rain." (Doing your best to look as if you understand.) Look at what he's looking at or pointing to, to give you clues; this can slide into teaching him sign language. You can strain to try to hear the syllables he's making. Parents can usually understand their own kids while it still sounds like babbling to everyone else, because they've had practice in listening to it. You can even treat his screams as speech. Maybe that would help. When he begins to scream, guess what he might be trying to say, and reply, e.g. "yes, the train, would you like to play with it?" or "isn't that a nice blue train?" or "sure, here it is" (handing it to him), or "choo! choo!" (making it go), etc. Try to reply just as if he had said something. I think that might well help. But for it to work, you also need to do the same sort of replying whenever he makes any other sound, too. And it would also help to come close to him and listen carefully to him. Even if you don't succeed in understanding his words, I think he will appreciate that you look as if you're listening and trying to understand. And of course, more and more often you will succeed in understanding. I would avoid saying to him "what did you say?" and stuff like that. Instead, I suggest either imitating what he just said, or (probably better), replying by saying something else. -- Cathy A *much* better world is possible. |
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