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How to stop him?



 
 
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  #21  
Old December 7th 06, 02:24 PM posted to alt.child-support
Phil
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 387
Default How to stop him?


"teachrmama" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
Why would I want to encourage this? As I said before she is having to
see a therapist because she is having emotional problems related to
change. Any change in her routine sets off a crying fit. It will not
help her to be forced to go with someone that she doesn't want to
see.I thought they used the best interest of the child to determine
these things?

Her father was just someone that I had a brief fling with. We didn't
really care that much about each other and we both understood that.
If
he is such a caring father then where was for the first 6 years of
her
life? He could have found me if he wanted. Now just because I asked
for some help with the kid that he is halfway responsible for all of
a
sudden he wants to act like hes a real dad to her. She doesn't even
like him. She got along fine without him all this time and now he
shows up disrupting her life. Is that fair to her? Do the courts
really think it will be in her best interest to have her being
dragged
out of the house by someone she doesn't like and just barely knows?
That seems like child abuse!


You have got some major growing up to do. He is her FATHER. You want
him to be a father in $$$$ only. But your daughter DESERVES her
father in her life. And if her only parent to date is acting as
childish as you are (and you are whether you like it or not), no
wonder she is haveing such a hard time. Apparently she was having a
hard time with change before you ever invited him otp the picture.
Just what caused that?

Did the father know about the child? Did you invite him to be a part
of her life from the very beginning? Did you let him know where you
were moving when you moved? If it was such a casual,
no-strings-attached fling, why are you asking for $$$ now? Why doe he
owe you that, but not deserve a relationship with the child? Why do
you feel it is in the child's best interest to be raised not knowing
her father? You do realize that there is a chance that the courts
will take the child from you and give her to her father if they feel
that your attitude and actions are harming her. And, from what you
have posted here, your attitude does not seem to reflect any knowledge
of the fact that your child deserves a relationship with ehr father.
The courts frown on that.


Seems to me like she got what she wanted (a child) and wants to be paid
for it as well.
Phil #3


  #22  
Old December 7th 06, 02:37 PM posted to alt.child-support
Phil
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 387
Default How to stop him?


"Dale" wrote in message
et...

"Phil" wrote in

Seems like women think that the pussy is just a ticket for a free
ride.


For many, it is and just as many men haven't figured it out yet.


Yes, we live in ignorance until it's too late and we're forced to pay
between $600 to $1400 per month.

Even for the those Fathers that plan and want children in a marriage,
they have no choices when the relationship breaks down. Is it right
that a man is totally controlled by the governemnet becuase he has
fallen into the catatgory of Divorce Status?


Just who is in control of the US? Does the populace control government
or the other way around?
To my mind, the laws that are being created, and have been created for
the past 30 or more years are nothing but control of the people that is
growing in speed and severity.
--
"Government is not reason. It is not eloquence. It is force. Like
fire, it can be either a dangerous servant or a fearful master." Geo.
Washington
Phil #3


  #23  
Old December 7th 06, 02:40 PM posted to alt.child-support
Phil
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 387
Default How to stop him?


"Chris" wrote in message
news

"Phil" wrote in message
ink.net...

"Mr. Anonymous" wrote in message
t.com...
It's kind of funny, isn't it? The girlfriends are all full of
advice
about "divorce him", "sue him", and all sorts of stuff, yet nobody
figures that there might be a backlash. Only loads of free
money...

Seems like women think that the pussy is just a ticket for a free
ride.


For many, it is and just as many men haven't figured it out yet.
Phil #3


Let me see: give sex, get money. Isn't there a name for that?



Two in fact; synonyms: Child support and prostitution.
Phil #3



"Dale" wrote in message
. net...

"Janet" wrote in

She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
She is seeing a therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid
that
this will set her
back if she is forced to go visiting him.

I don't get it, you say she doesn't hardly knows the man, but has
been in therapy previously and spending time with him will set her
back? Since when does a parent's love do damage to a child?

Perhaps the reason your boyfriend was absent all these years is
because you shut him out from your daughter's life? Let me guess,
you filed for C$ money just in time before her 6th birthday, so
the
state can legally collect arrearages from the time of birth? Did
you really think you were going to collect a $30,000 check with no
strings attached or did all your girlfriends not tell you about
that
part?

If you are really serious about stopping him and you were being
truthful, then drop the CS case.
If he's really not interested, he will go away!!!!!!!!!!






--
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  #24  
Old December 7th 06, 03:11 PM posted to alt.child-support
Tiffany
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 11
Default How to stop him?


"Janet" wrote in message
...
Why would I want to encourage this? As I said before she is having to
see a therapist because she is having emotional problems related to
change. Any change in her routine sets off a crying fit. It will not
help her to be forced to go with someone that she doesn't want to
see.I thought they used the best interest of the child to determine
these things?

Her father was just someone that I had a brief fling with. We didn't
really care that much about each other and we both understood that. If
he is such a caring father then where was for the first 6 years of her
life? He could have found me if he wanted. Now just because I asked
for some help with the kid that he is halfway responsible for all of a
sudden he wants to act like hes a real dad to her. She doesn't even
like him. She got along fine without him all this time and now he
shows up disrupting her life. Is that fair to her? Do the courts
really think it will be in her best interest to have her being dragged
out of the house by someone she doesn't like and just barely knows?
That seems like child abuse!




However it may appear to you, it is not abuse. IF your daughter at the age
of six has had issues with change, that isn't because her father wants to be
a daddy. If you want what is best, you need to gradually include him in her
life. It truly is that simple. I am sure if you and him sit down and speak
with her counseler, the counselor can explain why its important to ease into
this transaction.

You can also try to put blame on him.... play the "Where have you been??"
blah blah. How old was he? You? Regardless of where he WAS, he is here NOW.
Actually, you should be very happy! How wonderful for your daughter that her
daddy cares. If you look at this is a wonderful thing, don't you think she
will catch on and be happy to? How great that your daughter may grow up with
a father, instead of being a child with only one parent.



  #25  
Old December 7th 06, 03:20 PM posted to alt.child-support
Phil
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 387
Default How to stop him?


"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Chris" wrote in message
...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no
interest in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very
uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see
her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the
thought of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

He's her father. He has as much right to see the child on HIS own
turf as
you do.


Since when have you become pro-father?


I was never against fathers.


Riiiight. By the way, I have a bridge in the Sahara that's for sale.

I'm against whiners who blame everyone else for their problems, i'm
against anyone who doesn't show a strong sense of personal
responsibility, I"m against liars and cheats.


So why do you defend those very people? And you do, frequently.
Perhaps by reading your own words, you manage to retain some self-esteem
but I doubt there are many here who believe you.
I don't.


And yes, I'm also against the various folks who continue to slam me
for things that I don't do (and never did), who prove over and over
that they bought into some former poster's bull****, and really have
no clue what I'm about at all.


And those of us who base our opinions of you on your postings and think
you're anti-father.
Phil#3






Jan








  #26  
Old December 7th 06, 03:30 PM posted to alt.child-support
Moon Shyne
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 427
Default How to stop him?


"Phil" wrote in message
ink.net...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Chris" wrote in message
...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no interest
in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time! She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is seeing
a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the thought
of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

He's her father. He has as much right to see the child on HIS own turf
as
you do.

Since when have you become pro-father?


I was never against fathers.


Riiiight. By the way, I have a bridge in the Sahara that's for sale.

I'm against whiners who blame everyone else for their problems, i'm
against anyone who doesn't show a strong sense of personal responsibility,
I"m against liars and cheats.


So why do you defend those very people? And you do, frequently.
Perhaps by reading your own words, you manage to retain some self-esteem
but I doubt there are many here who believe you.
I don't.


None of which makes one iota in how I live my life. If you think you can
point me to where you claim that I "frequently" "defend those very people",
please feel free to do so.



And yes, I'm also against the various folks who continue to slam me for
things that I don't do (and never did), who prove over and over that they
bought into some former poster's bull****, and really have no clue what
I'm about at all.


And those of us who base our opinions of you on your postings and think
you're anti-father.


And again, that makes not a single iota of difference to how I live my life.

Phil#3






Jan










  #27  
Old December 7th 06, 04:10 PM posted to alt.child-support
Phil
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 387
Default How to stop him?


"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Phil" wrote in message
ink.net...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Chris" wrote in message
...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no
interest in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very
uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could
see her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the
thought of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It
will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

He's her father. He has as much right to see the child on HIS own
turf as
you do.

Since when have you become pro-father?

I was never against fathers.


Riiiight. By the way, I have a bridge in the Sahara that's for sale.

I'm against whiners who blame everyone else for their problems, i'm
against anyone who doesn't show a strong sense of personal
responsibility, I"m against liars and cheats.


So why do you defend those very people? And you do, frequently.
Perhaps by reading your own words, you manage to retain some
self-esteem but I doubt there are many here who believe you.
I don't.


None of which makes one iota in how I live my life. If you think you
can point me to where you claim that I "frequently" "defend those very
people", please feel free to do so.


It isn't necessary. Anyone who reads here can determine for themselves.
I am sure you do not care but you could ask them how they view you and
whether your viewpoint seems a bit prejudiced.



And yes, I'm also against the various folks who continue to slam me
for things that I don't do (and never did), who prove over and over
that they bought into some former poster's bull****, and really have
no clue what I'm about at all.


And those of us who base our opinions of you on your postings and
think you're anti-father.


And again, that makes not a single iota of difference to how I live my
life.


True. You're frequently wrong but never in doubt.
Phil #3


Phil#3






Jan












  #28  
Old December 7th 06, 06:07 PM posted to alt.child-support
Moon Shyne
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 427
Default How to stop him?


"Phil" wrote in message
ink.net...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Phil" wrote in message
ink.net...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Chris" wrote in message
...

"Moon Shyne" wrote in message
...

"Janet" wrote in message
...
My exboyfriend and I had a little girl in 1999. He took no interest
in
her until I filed for child support a year ago. Now that I filed
for
support he wants to see her all the time. She is very uncomfortable
around him and I have my doubts about him as well. I just got a
notice
of a hearing for him wanting to establish forced parenting time!
She
hardly knows this man. She doesn't even like seeing him at my
house.
Can he just come in and take her out of here that way? She is
seeing a
therapist for emotional issues and I'm afraid that this will set
her
back if she is forced to go visiting him. I told him he could see
her
over here but he says that isn't good enough. Is there any way I
can
stop him? Will the court make her see him? I can't bear the thought
of
her being dragged out of the house kicking and screaming. It will
break my heart. Would they really allow that to happen?

Thanks for your help.

He's her father. He has as much right to see the child on HIS own
turf as
you do.

Since when have you become pro-father?

I was never against fathers.

Riiiight. By the way, I have a bridge in the Sahara that's for sale.

I'm against whiners who blame everyone else for their problems, i'm
against anyone who doesn't show a strong sense of personal
responsibility, I"m against liars and cheats.

So why do you defend those very people? And you do, frequently.
Perhaps by reading your own words, you manage to retain some self-esteem
but I doubt there are many here who believe you.
I don't.


None of which makes one iota in how I live my life. If you think you can
point me to where you claim that I "frequently" "defend those very
people", please feel free to do so.


It isn't necessary. Anyone who reads here can determine for themselves.
I am sure you do not care but you could ask them how they view you and
whether your viewpoint seems a bit prejudiced.


You're right - I don't care. The opinions of people who actually KNOW me
carry far more weight.




And yes, I'm also against the various folks who continue to slam me for
things that I don't do (and never did), who prove over and over that
they bought into some former poster's bull****, and really have no clue
what I'm about at all.

And those of us who base our opinions of you on your postings and think
you're anti-father.


And again, that makes not a single iota of difference to how I live my
life.


True. You're frequently wrong but never in doubt.


We're all frequently wrong, Phil - even you :-)


Phil #3


Phil#3






Jan














  #29  
Old December 7th 06, 07:09 PM posted to alt.child-support
Gini
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 936
Default How to stop him?


"Tiffany" wrote

"teachrmama" wrote

.......
It's going to be up to you to make this easy for her. The judge almost
certaily will assign him time with his chld. So you need to start talking
about all the wonderful things little girls can do with their fathers.
Talk
to him, and arrange for the 3 of you to start doing some things
together--go
out for a hamburger, go see a movie, etc. Laugh with him, talk with him.
Let HER see what a nice man he is. (You obviously did more thatn laugh
and
talk at one point in time, or she wouldn't be here) Let her see the man
you
cared enough about to create her. YOU have the power to help this happen
without trauma. Be a loving mother to your daughter and help her get to
know and love her daddy.


Great post TM! I couldn't have said it any better.

==
This case appears to be a prime (and tragic) example of PAS. Given that,
the
father stands a reasonable chance of getting very liberal parenting access.
I hope
the judge sees how the mother has manipulated this child's emotions to the
point of
her needing therapy and being in fear of her father with whom she has been
denied contact.
I hope the judge sees through it all for the best interest of this little
girl.


  #30  
Old December 7th 06, 07:21 PM posted to alt.child-support
Dale
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 95
Default How to stop him?


"Moon Shyne" wrote in

You're right - I don't care. The opinions of people who actually KNOW me
carry far more weight.


And once again the subject matter depletes into all about her.

Can we not get passed this rambling idiot, some of us have much larger
issues to deal with such a imprisonment, forced poverty, Shyster lawyers and
a corrupt government system.

Recognize that USENET Kooks will take the opposite side of any discussion to
create excitement for themselves. They thrive on the attention as they have
no life outside of the internet.

When you see a posting from a looney like Moon Shyne, expect a wacked out
responce and ignore it.
Lets move on, there's more important things to discuss.

thanks

Dale




 




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