Fathers & toilet/changing facilities

DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who will no
doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is in a public
place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the toilet? Entrust her to
some strange woman? Take her into a grotty mens' loo?
Changing is an issue in itself. I can't think of any unisex baby changing
facilities in town. We have a womens' rest room, which has toilet facilities
for women with a large room at the front suitable for changing or feeding a
baby, but only toilets for men and there is a bold sign in front of the
restrooms stating that the facilities are for women/children only and mens'
toilets are around the side. This seems profoundly sexist and unfair to me
:-/
I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they need to
ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles etc, but why ban
a father with his children? What do the solo Dads out there do?

Amy wrote:
DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who will no
doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is in a public
place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the toilet? Entrust her to
some strange woman? Take her into a grotty mens' loo?
Changing is an issue in itself. I can't think of any unisex baby changing
facilities in town. We have a womens' rest room, which has toilet facilities
for women with a large room at the front suitable for changing or feeding a
baby, but only toilets for men and there is a bold sign in front of the
restrooms stating that the facilities are for women/children only and mens'
toilets are around the side. This seems profoundly sexist and unfair to me
:-/
I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they need to
ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles etc, but why ban
a father with his children? What do the solo Dads out there do?



My husband took our daughter in the men's bathroom a few times.

I've changed my babies in plenty of bathrooms that didn't have changing
facilities, so I don't see that as an issue.

Clisby

Amy wrote in message
DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who will
no doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is in a public
place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the toilet?

Here in Michigan, they have changing stations in the men's bathroom. Some
stores also have family bathrooms. If the child is a toddler, then of course
your husband brings her in the men's bathroom. Personally, it hasn't been a
problem for us. If worse comes to worse, just change the baby in a discrete
place and throw the diaper away.
--
Sue (mom to three girls)

On Fri, 4 Jun 2004 23:23:53 +1200, "Amy"
wrote:

DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who will no
doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is in a public
place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the toilet? Entrust her to
some strange woman? Take her into a grotty mens' loo?
Changing is an issue in itself. I can't think of any unisex baby changing
facilities in town. We have a womens' rest room, which has toilet facilities
for women with a large room at the front suitable for changing or feeding a
baby, but only toilets for men and there is a bold sign in front of the
restrooms stating that the facilities are for women/children only and mens'
toilets are around the side. This seems profoundly sexist and unfair to me
:-/
I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they need to
ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles etc, but why ban
a father with his children? What do the solo Dads out there do?


My DH takes them into the disabled rooms. That's what they ask us to
do at the local swimming pool so it works for us everywhere else.
Mostly though we only go places which have parent's rooms for either
gender but that's pure luck rather than good management on our part,
so the disabled toilet idea is a good option for everywhere else.


--
Cheryl
Mum to Shrimp (11 Mar 99), Thud (4 Oct 00)
and Mischief (30 Jul 02)

On Fri, 4 Jun 2004 23:23:53 +1200, "Amy"
wrote:
DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who will no
doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is in a public
place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the toilet? Entrust her to
some strange woman? Take her into a grotty mens' loo?

Dh took our daughters to the men's room...but since they've gotten old
enough to use the women's alone it hasn't been an issue (they don't go
out as much without me anymore)

Changing is an issue in itself. I can't think of any unisex baby changing
facilities in town. We have a womens' rest room, which has toilet facilities
for women with a large room at the front suitable for changing or feeding a
baby, but only toilets for men and there is a bold sign in front of the
restrooms stating that the facilities are for women/children only and mens'
toilets are around the side. This seems profoundly sexist and unfair to me
:-/
I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they need to
ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles etc, but why ban
a father with his children? What do the solo Dads out there do?

Dh always took the babies to the car and changed them there.
Marie

"Amy" wrote in message
...
DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who will
no
doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is in a public
place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the toilet?

What age are you talking about?

Entrust her to some strange woman?

I wouldn't.

Take her into a grotty mens' loo?

He has.

Changing is an issue in itself. I can't think of any unisex baby changing
facilities in town. We have a womens' rest room, which has toilet
facilities
for women with a large room at the front suitable for changing or feeding
a
baby, but only toilets for men and there is a bold sign in front of the
restrooms stating that the facilities are for women/children only and
mens'
toilets are around the side. This seems profoundly sexist and unfair to me
:-/

There are no baby changing stations in the men's room? Just about
everywhere here has them.

I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they need to
ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles etc, but why
ban
a father with his children? What do the solo Dads out there do?

Get writing!

Sophie
#4 due July 7, 2004

Amy wrote:
DH came up with a really good question the other day. As someone who
will no doubt be a hands-on Dad, what is he supposed to do if he is
in a public place by himself and our daughter needs to go to the
toilet? Entrust her to some strange woman? Take her into a grotty
mens' loo?

Take her to the men's room. I have sons but the toilets are just as grotty
:-) Carry those flushable Clorox wipes (not sure you have them where you
are - they are like baby wipes only disinfectant wipes) or one of those fold
up seats if he/you fear the toilets are to yucky to sit on.

Changing is an issue in itself. I can't think of any
unisex baby changing facilities in town.

I change them in the car a lot. Once mine are old enough to stand I usually
change them standing when out and about. Lots of our men's bathrooms have
the changing tables in them though so I would write to family oriented
business or to the city council about the problem.

The big mall (1.5hrs away and I hardly ever go there) has a family lounge
and 5 large single bathrooms coming off of it. Men are allowed there. You
can get all your kids in one bathroom. You can sit and nurse. Lots of
space to change on counters in the lounge area, not the bathrooms, which is
a plus to me. It is great :-)

--
Nikki
Mama to Hunter (5) and Luke (3)

Well, you know, I have three boys who have spent a great deal of time im
women's restrooms with me. Why shouldn't a father be able to take a daughter
into the men's restroom?

Leslie

On Fri, 04 Jun 2004 23:23:53 +1200, Amy wrote:

I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they need to
ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles etc, but why ban
a father with his children? What do the solo Dads out there do?

I'm not sure whereabouts you are, but my DH changes DS wherever he finds
a place. Around here (eastern US), a LOT of the men's bathrooms have baby
changing facilities, something which stunned me, as it's one of the things
that you hardly ever find in Europe (in spite of their progressive
nature). When there is none and no room to put DS elsewhere, he tries the
disabled toilet, or just changes DS on the floor wherever there is a clean
spot. Nobody has ever complained (we even did this in the middle of the US
embassy in the Netherlands, where there is no bathroom at all).

Now when DS becomes potty trained, obviously there is no problem as he's a
boy. But with a girl, he could just take her into the men's room. They
have toiletpaper there too, and we have found that in most places the
cleanliness of women's or men's room is comparable (it's either bad in
both or good in both).

--
-- I
mommy to DS (July '02)
mommy to three tiny angels (28 Oct'03, 17 Feb'04 & 20 May'04)
guardian of DH (33)

Amy wibbled

I'm tempted to write to our council about the problem. I know they
need to ensure that a restroom for children is free of paedophiles
etc, but why ban a father with his children? What do the solo Dads
out there do?

If you're in the UK (your spelling and phrasing make me guess that
you might be) there *are* changing stations in a lot of men's
toilets, in 'chain' pubs and restaurants, for instance, and
department stores, Mothercare, Boots etc also have separate
babychange rooms with no restriction. You can lock the door while
you're in there, most of them have toilets as well as the baby
change section, and where the breastfeeding room is part of
it/connected there's usually a curtain for privacy, so there's
generally no problem with fathers. DH has changed T in a variety of
places, almost as many as I have. Often we've both gone in if we're
out as a family.

Whereabouts are you? There are some good resources on the web for
locating babychange places, but not for every town IIRC.

Jac