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how to file for child support



 
 
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  #11  
Old February 10th 06, 01:36 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support


"SpiderHam77" wrote in message
oups.com...
Okay I was reading the replies to this guys questions.. And well P.
Fritz you seem to be the most negative on the issue. I to am a Single
father of a Son. Who does not recived Child support... However that
said I have requested and applied for it.

Main reason for such an endavor.. it's not because I'm looking to get
rich. I am quite confortable on my own. And we live a confortable
life. My reasons behind are much more evil then that... She is also
the parent of my child. Just because she decided she wanted to be
single, and not have to worry about her children, doesn't mean she is
not responsible for them.

If this were a woman asking the same quesiton would the answers you
all seem to be giving be the same.. No.. you would first be condemming
her for even thinking she has a right to child support, and then after
that you would start to spout off how dumb the system is.

Myself.. I have set up an Education plan. I have made it clear to my
ex, any monies she gives me for my our son. Thats where it's going.
However I do feel she is obligated to hold up her end of th bargin...
Especially considering she is the one who decided to bring the child to
term, and have it. Apprently in other arguments men don't have the
ability to have any control on this matter...


Has it ever crossed your mind that women who get pregnant by men other than
their husbands have tremendous feelings of guilt? And some of those women
leave the marriage and the child behind as a reaction to their guilt and
inability to live with the situation they created?


  #12  
Old February 10th 06, 02:11 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support


Bob Whiteside wrote:

Has it ever crossed your mind that women who get pregnant by men other than
their husbands have tremendous feelings of guilt? And some of those women
leave the marriage and the child behind as a reaction to their guilt and
inability to live with the situation they created?


Sure it has crossed my mind... The more important question is.. Does
it matter? If so, then from the sounds of it there alot of men out
there I'm sure can tell you they have been screwed then.

Why is there so much concern on the thought process of the woman in
all of this. Why does it matter? All that matters is that she is not
there. And she is still responsible for the well being of her
children, just like we men seemed to be forced to be responsible for
our children.

If we could simply use the excuse that we felt guilty about the whole
thing, and didn't want to accept responsibilty. I can garantee you
that the idea of being forced to pay Child Support would not exsist.

I honestly have no concern at all over the mental state of the Woman.
It really doesn't make a difference if she is the happiest person on
the planet, or the most miserable. As long as she fulfills her
responsibilty of caring for her children, she will recieve no complaint
from me.

SpiderHam77

  #13  
Old February 10th 06, 03:17 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support


"SpiderHam77" wrote in message
ups.com...

Bob Whiteside wrote:

Has it ever crossed your mind that women who get pregnant by men other

than
their husbands have tremendous feelings of guilt? And some of those

women
leave the marriage and the child behind as a reaction to their guilt and
inability to live with the situation they created?


Sure it has crossed my mind... The more important question is.. Does
it matter? If so, then from the sounds of it there alot of men out
there I'm sure can tell you they have been screwed then.


You are trying to change the subject away from a valid point I made. The
woman's motives are always assumed to be pure as the driven snow in family
law. I am sure there are many instances where women could actually have
alterior motives including the one I suggested could be the case.

What if the OP was not only duped into believing he was the father of the
children, but now was paying 100% to support someone else's children?
Wouldn't he have been duped twice under those circumstances? Why is it not
reasonable to suggest a man get a DNA test before he accepts custody and a
lifetime of parenting obligations?


Why is there so much concern on the thought process of the woman in
all of this. Why does it matter? All that matters is that she is not
there. And she is still responsible for the well being of her
children, just like we men seemed to be forced to be responsible for
our children.


What would you recommend to a man raising children that are someone else's
biological children? Just forget the woman's motives?


If we could simply use the excuse that we felt guilty about the whole
thing, and didn't want to accept responsibilty. I can garantee you
that the idea of being forced to pay Child Support would not exsist.

I honestly have no concern at all over the mental state of the Woman.
It really doesn't make a difference if she is the happiest person on
the planet, or the most miserable. As long as she fulfills her
responsibilty of caring for her children, she will recieve no complaint
from me.


But what if the man is raising her children for her and he is not the
biological father? Should he ignore her mental state just for the right to
be a parent?

BTW - This is why I am an advocate for mandatory DNA testing of every child
at birth before a birth certificate is issued.


  #14  
Old February 10th 06, 04:33 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support


"SpiderHam77" wrote in message
oups.com...
Okay I was reading the replies to this guys questions.. And well P.
Fritz you seem to be the most negative on the issue.


Because C.S. is unconsitutional

I to am a Single
father of a Son. Who does not recived Child support... However that
said I have requested and applied for it.


So, you are an idiot.


Main reason for such an endavor.. it's not because I'm looking to get
rich. I am quite confortable on my own. And we live a confortable
life. My reasons behind are much more evil then that... She is also
the parent of my child.


So

Just because she decided she wanted to be
single, and not have to worry about her children, doesn't mean she is
not responsible for them.


That does not make it a guvmint problem


If this were a woman asking the same quesiton would the answers you
all seem to be giving be the same.. No.. you would first be condemming
her for even thinking she has a right to child support, and then after
that you would start to spout off how dumb the system is.


So it is no different when a male asks for the same thing.


Myself.. I have set up an Education plan. I have made it clear to my
ex, any monies she gives me for my our son. Thats where it's going.
However I do feel she is obligated to hold up her end of th bargin...


What "bargain"???

Especially considering she is the one who decided to bring the child to
term, and have it. Apprently in other arguments men don't have the
ability to have any control on this matter...

So if she right to decide to do such an action, wouldn't logic dicate
she also has a responsibility to care for her child?


There is no logic in the C.S. system


Now this whole notion of saying don't do it because we men should
consider ourselves lucky to have such a order come out in our favour,
is just plain dumb.


No, it is reality/

How is something like this going to become the
norm in society if we don't push it all the way through. Not just
being content with the "Luck" (And I use that term Loosly).


It goes far beyond getting "even" you are just too blind to see it.



I can't honestly see her be responsible for arrears since you
specifically opted out of such payments at the start.. That could of
been for a variety of reason, they are not important.

What is important is that if a Single Mothe is entitled to Child
Support, then so is a Single Father.


Key word....entitlement....there is no such thing........if you buy into
the system, than you are a whore, just like women that do.

End of Story.. And this thing
about her gaining custody.. I think is also hogwash...


Then you are an idiot.


She has had no Physical contact with her children... Most is the odd
phone call, maybe a card here and there... I can't imagine any Court,
even if they are Pro Mommy, taking them away from Dad to go live with a
mother that one of them hasn't known since the age of 2.


Then you are even more of an idiot


Monsar I personally think you should go for support if for no other
reason your trying to build a College Fun for your Daughters...
According to the Law you are entitled to recived such support,
therefore it should be paid.


Laws say all kinds of things....it doesn;t make them moral or just.


SpiderHam77



  #15  
Old February 10th 06, 04:56 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support

To the original poster,

Just forget about child support, you probably make a lot more than your
ex. If you live in an income shares state, you are not going to get all
that much money anyway. You are one lucky guy. The system is strange
and silly. You might get accused of abuse. It is a dirty, dirty, dirty
system. Count your blessings, unless you want to post to this group
full time.

Talk to your daughters when they are older, if they wanna sue for
support to go to college on, you can do that and put them through
college with it.

Your risks are too high. Male CP's are rare enough, and you could lose
your kids. Don't do it. Is it worth a 10% (debatable) chance you might
lose your kids for a couple hundred bucks a month? Is it worth even a
1% chance?

J

  #16  
Old February 10th 06, 12:41 PM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support

I don't think it could have been said any better. Right or wrong, it is not
worth the risk.
wrote in message
ups.com...
To the original poster,

Just forget about child support, you probably make a lot more than your
ex. If you live in an income shares state, you are not going to get all
that much money anyway. You are one lucky guy. The system is strange
and silly. You might get accused of abuse. It is a dirty, dirty, dirty
system. Count your blessings, unless you want to post to this group
full time.

Talk to your daughters when they are older, if they wanna sue for
support to go to college on, you can do that and put them through
college with it.

Your risks are too high. Male CP's are rare enough, and you could lose
your kids. Don't do it. Is it worth a 10% (debatable) chance you might
lose your kids for a couple hundred bucks a month? Is it worth even a
1% chance?

J



  #17  
Old February 10th 06, 06:26 PM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support

She may
have some feminist groups supporting her in court. And the prejudice
against
fathers in domestic relations courts in the U.S. is so strong that she
may
very well succeed.

You would almost definitely lose the children. Let it alone and stay
out of the court at all costs.

Ruben

  #18  
Old February 11th 06, 12:40 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support



Confused_Dad wrote:

Go to your Social services department for your count and they will
direct you in the right direction.. However be careful. I have read
some of these posting and these people are right. I would not be
suprised in the least if she tries to turn the custody on you. You are
better off waiting until they are 17 and 11 (that way they can make
their owm minds up). Then nail the B____ for child support. if
everything goes your way she will have to pay for all arrears since the
divorce (that's what happened to me to an extent). The mother of my
daughter filed 10 months after and I had to pay all the way back to her
birth. I didn't mind since she was my daughter. But I have heard
other cases where this had happened (only to guys though of course)


I agree, get by on your own until it's too late for her to file for a
change of custody. The draconian laws about arrears are your friend here.

- Ron ^*^

  #19  
Old February 11th 06, 02:02 AM posted to alt.child-support
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Default how to file for child support


wrote:
To the original poster,

Just forget about child support, you probably make a lot more than your
ex. If you live in an income shares state, you are not going to get all
that much money anyway. You are one lucky guy. The system is strange
and silly. You might get accused of abuse. It is a dirty, dirty, dirty
system. Count your blessings, unless you want to post to this group
full time.


See now that kinda of logic and thinking is whats going to keep the
system the same.. Could you imagine telling people from the Civil
Rights movement that because they are black they should consider
themselves lucky to just be working, and deal with it.

To me what alot of you have been saying is pretty much the same
argument. If you read the story he presented correctly.. 6 years have
passed since he was already AWARDED custody. Not fighting for it now..
already awarded it.

The courts are not going to try and undo this after 6 years of
Custody, if the mother has not bothered to fight for custody yet. I
like to think our judges are a little smarter then that. And can read
between the lines...

And who cares how much he makes.. not the point... I make a fair bit
of coin myself... My Son and can manage without any support from my ex.
However it does not negate a person from taking care of their
responsibilty. In my particular case as I mentioned.. Any money she
gives me will go straight into a Register College Education Plan. End
of story... And I will not be able to touch the money until he is 25
and decided not to use it for college.

Talk to your daughters when they are older, if they wanna sue for
support to go to college on, you can do that and put them through
college with it.

Your risks are too high. Male CP's are rare enough, and you could lose
your kids. Don't do it. Is it worth a 10% (debatable) chance you might
lose your kids for a couple hundred bucks a month? Is it worth even a
1% chance?


Is it worth the chance to take any risk in life. If people are not
willing to take a risk.. then nothing would ever become accomplished.
No one would ever leave their door in day. In this case I believe the
risk is well below 10%... and even it were 10%, I like those odds. I
have a 9 in 10 chance in things going my way... Hmm....

SpiderHam77

J


 




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