Getting Married

wrote in message
oups.com...
Hi,

I am about to get married to a guy with a daughter. He pays his child
support every month. He and his ex have a verbal agreement to pay a
fixed amount every month.

My question is, if this relationship were to ever go south, could his
ex go after me for child support?

Cautious in CA

Don't get married to him until his child support agreement is legalized.
Verbal agreements won't stand up in court, and if their relationship did go
south it could mean a lot of trouble in your relationship. Also, the
relationship between his daughter and you could easily go south which will
have an impact on the overall situation. You should consider putting off
your marriage for some time - if not until the daughter is an adult. I
speak from experience... reconsider your choice and make sure everything
concerning child support & visitations are legalized. Even if they were
legalized doesn't mean trouble can't happen, as it typically does in all
relationships involving step-coupling.

While you are at it I highly suggest that you sit down and read
"Stepcoupling" by Susan Wisdom & Jennifer Green. It may give you an idea
what your life will become if you decide to marry.


Thanks,
Tracy
~~~~
http://www.hornschuch.net/tracy/

Aside from the emotional issues, is there any legal issues that I need
to worry about? How about property? Savings?

"Becca" wrote in message
oups.com...
Aside from the emotional issues, is there any legal issues that I need
to worry about? How about property? Savings?

Any property, asset, savings etc. you have with your husband-to-be can be
seized to pay CS.

Any income you earn will be considered in setting any future CS awards as an
amount available for his use.

Any joint income tax return refunds you are due can be seized unless you
file an exemption.

Any asset you bring into the marriage can have a lien placed against it to
pay his CS.

Any children you have together will be considered irrelevant in the eyes of
the family court.

"Becca" wrote in

Aside from the emotional issues, is there any legal issues that I need
to worry about? How about property? Savings?

Marriage is not a good idea for grown adults, it's a fable for teen age
princesses!

Just share a place together, so much less hassle!!!!!!

You know...my relationship with my step-son was actually encouraged by
his mother before my husband and I got married.....as I wasn't a
"Perminant Figure" in her eyes then....she used to actually ask me to
babysit him....then when we anounced that we were getting
married....The Bomb Hit!!! Just be careful....Verbal Agreements to pay
child support Mean NOTHING. If she did take him to court for child
support....thoes payments he has been making her without a court order
would be considered "Gifts".....he may have to start all over with
interest from the time they seperated. Before you even think about
getting married to him....he needs to have a Court-Ordered Child
Support Payment, that can be tracked and credited as Child Support. If
not....If (when) the ex asks the court for that order....your joint
assets could be siezed to pay for all this time it was under "verbal"
agreement.....Just CYA!

"Erin" wrote
You know...my relationship with my step-son was actually encouraged by
his mother before my husband and I got married.....as I wasn't a
"Perminant Figure" in her eyes then....she used to actually ask me to
babysit him....then when we anounced that we were getting
married....The Bomb Hit!!! Just be careful....Verbal Agreements to pay
child support Mean NOTHING. If she did take him to court for child
support....thoes payments he has been making her without a court order
would be considered "Gifts".....he may have to start all over with
interest from the time they seperated. Before you even think about
getting married to him....he needs to have a Court-Ordered Child
Support Payment, that can be tracked and credited as Child Support. If
not....If (when) the ex asks the court for that order....your joint
assets could be siezed
==
Only if the controlling state is a community property state. Otherwise,
they can simply not have any joint assets. To the OP--Erin is right and it
needs to
be reemphasized--Without court ordered support paid through CSE, the
payments could be considered
a gift--even if you have receipts. Yep, bizarre but true. We ended up 7k in
arrears because
of this and we were following the court order which did not state that the
payments be made
through CSE. When we got married his ex got ****ed (the loss of control
really ****es them off)
and went to CSE to open a collection case and told them she hadn't received
any child support.
Our lawyer had the receipts in a box but the judge didn't care. He said if
we couldn't tell him exactly what the money
was for (notation of "child support" on the payment isn't enough), the
payments were a "gift." You MUST to do a lot
of research into your state's child support statutes before you marry no
matter how nice the ex is or you
will get blindsided. What is the controlling state? Most of us here have
experience
with specific states and might be able to direct you better.
==

I am in Los Angeles, CA. I am mostly concerned about property that I
expect to inherit (not in the state of CA). I just want to cover all
of my bases. His ex has been known to change her tune quite frequently
and I want to protect myself.

"Becca" wrote in message
ups.com...
I am in Los Angeles, CA. I am mostly concerned about property that I
expect to inherit (not in the state of CA). I just want to cover all
of my bases. His ex has been known to change her tune quite frequently
and I want to protect myself.


Why are you getting married again?

wrote in message
roups.com...
Becca wrote:
: I am in Los Angeles, CA. I am mostly concerned about property that I
: expect to inherit (not in the state of CA). I just want to cover all
: of my bases. His ex has been known to change her tune quite frequently
: and I want to protect myself.


Inheritances are not part of community property in California in *most*
cases. They can become part of community property if the money is
comingled with joint funds in some cases. If they're kept in separate
accounts and not used for joint purchases it is unlikely they'll be part
of community property.

b.

What barry said. Also keep that home in YOUR name only. Any rents received
should go into YOUR account only. That will protect you if your new
marriage goes south. Have you considered a pre-nup?? I would highly
recommend it.

Big RJ