How can I prosecute Child Stealing / Custodial Interference (CALPC 278.5)

"krp" wrote in message
...

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
link.net...

The one comment about divorce that just drives me nuts is: "You should
have
hired a better attorney." The people who have never been through the
gender
biased system we call Family Law are generally the ones who make this
statement. I am one of those who believe the gender of the client has a
direct relationship on the attorney's ability to get results for the
client.

I went through it and won custody of three daughters, ages 10, 8 and 6
at the time. So I know. I also have been consulting on father custody
cases
for almost 30 years and in that time have helped make several thousand
custodial dads. Yes there is a bias against dads. Often it starts with the
lawyer you hire, but it is everywhere else. Just because it is a bad
situation that is no excuse to quit or be stupid. It's unfair, boo hoo,
now
quit or go out and win. Bitching about how unfair it all is changes
nothing
just makes you bitter and she wins.

I can tell you from personal experience that pushing the envelope to
overcome the bias within the system is treated by the courts as extending
the divorce process, harassing your soon to be ex, and causing her to run up
unnecessary legal expenses. As a result I have paid 100% of my exes
attorney fees totalling 10's of thousands of dollars. The bias in the
divorce industry is to protect women from the big, bad men who are trying to
manipulate them. The truth is women who are surveyed are very satisfied
with the divorce system because they get more than a fair share of
everything AND they feel in control of the process because of their gender.


Here is an example: My ex had an attorney who several women I knew were
referring each other to as a greatly skilled divorce lawyer. Of course,
I
got the usual hammering in my case. Then a man I know used the same
attorney the women held is such high regard, and he got hammered. In
fact,
this male friend told me this attorney didn't do anything for him and
lost
every issue.

Look - it takes LITTLE skill to win for a woman. In 90% of the cases
all
a lawyer needs to do is say; "look judge my client has boobs" and he wins.
It takes skill to win for a dad. It's that bias thing you were speaking
about. It makes it difficult and it makes it expensive to win, not
impossible. That lawyer never had to work before he represented women and
his heart wasn't in representing a man.

This theory seems to run counter to the well documented concept of
"negotiating in the shadow of the law." Fathers have two choices - accept
their attorney's knowledge of how the courts like to rule, or fight the
system. The latter option costs a lot of money and the results are
questionable.


I actually think I had a good attorney because he understood the
process,
set reasonable expectations for the outcome up front, detailed the
issues
we
could challenge and those we couldn't, and said his role as my attorney
was
to cut my loses because I was male.

Reasonable expectations is to WIN................!! Unless you want to
lose.

Actually, a reasonable expectation is to have the opposing party negotiate
in good faith, be honest about the facts and circumstances, and be willing
to compromise. I fought the system hard because of dirty trick negotiation
tactics used by my ex and her attorney, gross misrepresentations about her
lifestyle to the mediators and the court, personal attacks on me that were
baseless, her lying under oath, and her desire to end up with 100% of
everything and me sitting in jail. I paid the price for standing up against
these types of tactics. And the judge protected my ex from having to be
responsible for her unreasonable actions.

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
link.net...

I went through it and won custody of three daughters, ages 10, 8 and
6
at the time. So I know. I also have been consulting on father custody
cases
for almost 30 years and in that time have helped make several thousand
custodial dads. Yes there is a bias against dads. Often it starts with
the
lawyer you hire, but it is everywhere else. Just because it is a bad
situation that is no excuse to quit or be stupid. It's unfair, boo hoo,
now
quit or go out and win. Bitching about how unfair it all is changes
nothing
just makes you bitter and she wins.

I can tell you from personal experience that pushing the envelope to
overcome the bias within the system is treated by the courts as extending
the divorce process, harassing your soon to be ex, and causing her to run
up
unnecessary legal expenses. As a result I have paid 100% of my exes
attorney fees totalling 10's of thousands of dollars. The bias in the
divorce industry is to protect women from the big, bad men who are trying
to
manipulate them. The truth is women who are surveyed are very satisfied
with the divorce system because they get more than a fair share of
everything AND they feel in control of the process because of their
gender.

It has not been my experience that pushing the envelope when you are
solidly on the law and facts isn't a problem. If you attempt to "bull****"
the courts then you are in for hell week. There indeed IS a bias, however
you need to read Phyllis Chesler's book "Mothers on Trial" where sdhe
biutches endlessly that men fight for custody at all. One woman who Chesler
(and the feminazis) defend to the hilt was a woman one of the women Chesler
and radical feminists championed was Kathleen Gradi of Dallas, Texas as a
"GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!" Ms Gradi who lost custody of her son and daughter in
1979 to their father following an incident where she fractured the skull of
her daughter AImee and rammed a screwdriver through the right eye of her son
Clifford after beating him in a closet! Police found the child screaming in
a pool of blood. Gradi had broken more than one chair over the girl's head.
THIS, proclaimed the Feminists should NOT disqualify her from having SOLE
and TOTAL custody! She was, as the Feminists say a "GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!"
Good enough for what?

I never paid a penny of my ex's lawyer's fees, SHE paid some of mine!



Look - it takes LITTLE skill to win for a woman. In 90% of the cases
all
a lawyer needs to do is say; "look judge my client has boobs" and he
wins.
It takes skill to win for a dad. It's that bias thing you were speaking
about. It makes it difficult and it makes it expensive to win, not
impossible. That lawyer never had to work before he represented women
and
his heart wasn't in representing a man.

This theory seems to run counter to the well documented concept of
"negotiating in the shadow of the law." Fathers have two choices - accept
their attorney's knowledge of how the courts like to rule, or fight the
system. The latter option costs a lot of money and the results are
questionable.

NEVER just "accept" that somebody knows what they are doing. I might
agree that many law people know MORE than 90% of the lawyers who practice
law about the law. Most lawyers flatly don't give a ****. They have their JD
and their license and it is "caveat emptorer" (let the buyer beware).
Remember the old saying about the word ASS/U/ME! EDUCATE YOURSELF! Make
sure your lawye does a complete job! Half assing things gets you in the
hole. When representing a MAN in a domestic case a lawyer can never leave
ANYTHING to chance. Leave one tack for a judge to hang his hat on and screw
you and they will! You can't leave any tacks.

Reasonable expectations is to WIN................!! Unless you want
to lose.

Actually, a reasonable expectation is to have the opposing party negotiate
in good faith, be honest about the facts and circumstances, and be willing
to compromise. I fought the system hard because of dirty trick
negotiation
tactics used by my ex and her attorney, gross misrepresentations about her
lifestyle to the mediators and the court, personal attacks on me that were
baseless, her lying under oath, and her desire to end up with 100% of
everything and me sitting in jail. I paid the price for standing up
against
these types of tactics. And the judge protected my ex from having to be
responsible for her unreasonable actions.

If people acted in good faith we'd not need courts! If people acted in
good faith you wouldn't be getting a divorce! It is human nature, when
people are guilty they BLAME THE VICTIM. My first wife's lawyer LOST his
license to practice law! How? Well *I* caught his ass in having "ALTERED"
the final decree in the court file. Then TRYING to mislead the court with
the FAKE order! Last I heard he was mounting tires on cars at the B.F.
Goodrich store.

Don't ever go into a gunflight at the Courthouse at the O.K. coral with
an EMPTY GUN! ALWAYS have the FACTS and the LAW with you.
Bob - I have seen many situations like yours in the past 30 years. When I
went over the file with the men it was not hard to prove to them where they
dropped the ball (or more correctly their lawyer did). The law is a very
exactling mistress. If you ever read the book "Ali Baba and the 40 Theives"
or if you saw one of the movies (time for a remake Hollywierd) you may
recall that the magic cave of the Theives would only open if you said "Open
Sesame" and if you said anything else the cave would not open. The law is
the same way. "ALMOST" only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and nuclear
war. You can't ALMOST put on a good case, as a man you must put on a PERFECT
case ot LOSE! Fair? No! But neither is winning impossible! If you want to
watch the movie you have to pay the price to get into the theater.

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
link.net...

I went through it and won custody of three daughters, ages 10, 8 and
6
at the time. So I know. I also have been consulting on father custody
cases
for almost 30 years and in that time have helped make several thousand
custodial dads. Yes there is a bias against dads. Often it starts with
the
lawyer you hire, but it is everywhere else. Just because it is a bad
situation that is no excuse to quit or be stupid. It's unfair, boo hoo,
now
quit or go out and win. Bitching about how unfair it all is changes
nothing
just makes you bitter and she wins.

I can tell you from personal experience that pushing the envelope to
overcome the bias within the system is treated by the courts as extending
the divorce process, harassing your soon to be ex, and causing her to run
up
unnecessary legal expenses. As a result I have paid 100% of my exes
attorney fees totalling 10's of thousands of dollars. The bias in the
divorce industry is to protect women from the big, bad men who are trying
to
manipulate them. The truth is women who are surveyed are very satisfied
with the divorce system because they get more than a fair share of
everything AND they feel in control of the process because of their
gender.

It has not been my experience that pushing the envelope when you are
solidly on the law and facts isn't a problem. If you attempt to "bull****"
the courts then you are in for hell week. There indeed IS a bias, however
you need to read Phyllis Chesler's book "Mothers on Trial" where sdhe
biutches endlessly that men fight for custody at all. One woman who Chesler
(and the feminazis) defend to the hilt was a woman one of the women Chesler
and radical feminists championed was Kathleen Gradi of Dallas, Texas as a
"GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!" Ms Gradi who lost custody of her son and daughter in
1979 to their father following an incident where she fractured the skull of
her daughter AImee and rammed a screwdriver through the right eye of her son
Clifford after beating him in a closet! Police found the child screaming in
a pool of blood. Gradi had broken more than one chair over the girl's head.
THIS, proclaimed the Feminists should NOT disqualify her from having SOLE
and TOTAL custody! She was, as the Feminists say a "GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!"
Good enough for what?

I never paid a penny of my ex's lawyer's fees, SHE paid some of mine!



Look - it takes LITTLE skill to win for a woman. In 90% of the cases
all
a lawyer needs to do is say; "look judge my client has boobs" and he
wins.
It takes skill to win for a dad. It's that bias thing you were speaking
about. It makes it difficult and it makes it expensive to win, not
impossible. That lawyer never had to work before he represented women
and
his heart wasn't in representing a man.

This theory seems to run counter to the well documented concept of
"negotiating in the shadow of the law." Fathers have two choices - accept
their attorney's knowledge of how the courts like to rule, or fight the
system. The latter option costs a lot of money and the results are
questionable.

NEVER just "accept" that somebody knows what they are doing. I might
agree that many law people know MORE than 90% of the lawyers who practice
law about the law. Most lawyers flatly don't give a ****. They have their JD
and their license and it is "caveat emptorer" (let the buyer beware).
Remember the old saying about the word ASS/U/ME! EDUCATE YOURSELF! Make
sure your lawye does a complete job! Half assing things gets you in the
hole. When representing a MAN in a domestic case a lawyer can never leave
ANYTHING to chance. Leave one tack for a judge to hang his hat on and screw
you and they will! You can't leave any tacks.

Reasonable expectations is to WIN................!! Unless you want
to lose.

Actually, a reasonable expectation is to have the opposing party negotiate
in good faith, be honest about the facts and circumstances, and be willing
to compromise. I fought the system hard because of dirty trick
negotiation
tactics used by my ex and her attorney, gross misrepresentations about her
lifestyle to the mediators and the court, personal attacks on me that were
baseless, her lying under oath, and her desire to end up with 100% of
everything and me sitting in jail. I paid the price for standing up
against
these types of tactics. And the judge protected my ex from having to be
responsible for her unreasonable actions.

If people acted in good faith we'd not need courts! If people acted in
good faith you wouldn't be getting a divorce! It is human nature, when
people are guilty they BLAME THE VICTIM. My first wife's lawyer LOST his
license to practice law! How? Well *I* caught his ass in having "ALTERED"
the final decree in the court file. Then TRYING to mislead the court with
the FAKE order! Last I heard he was mounting tires on cars at the B.F.
Goodrich store.

Don't ever go into a gunflight at the Courthouse at the O.K. coral with
an EMPTY GUN! ALWAYS have the FACTS and the LAW with you.
Bob - I have seen many situations like yours in the past 30 years. When I
went over the file with the men it was not hard to prove to them where they
dropped the ball (or more correctly their lawyer did). The law is a very
exactling mistress. If you ever read the book "Ali Baba and the 40 Theives"
or if you saw one of the movies (time for a remake Hollywierd) you may
recall that the magic cave of the Theives would only open if you said "Open
Sesame" and if you said anything else the cave would not open. The law is
the same way. "ALMOST" only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and nuclear
war. You can't ALMOST put on a good case, as a man you must put on a PERFECT
case ot LOSE! Fair? No! But neither is winning impossible! If you want to
watch the movie you have to pay the price to get into the theater.

"Bob Whiteside" wrote in message
link.net...

I went through it and won custody of three daughters, ages 10, 8 and
6
at the time. So I know. I also have been consulting on father custody
cases
for almost 30 years and in that time have helped make several thousand
custodial dads. Yes there is a bias against dads. Often it starts with
the
lawyer you hire, but it is everywhere else. Just because it is a bad
situation that is no excuse to quit or be stupid. It's unfair, boo hoo,
now
quit or go out and win. Bitching about how unfair it all is changes
nothing
just makes you bitter and she wins.

I can tell you from personal experience that pushing the envelope to
overcome the bias within the system is treated by the courts as extending
the divorce process, harassing your soon to be ex, and causing her to run
up
unnecessary legal expenses. As a result I have paid 100% of my exes
attorney fees totalling 10's of thousands of dollars. The bias in the
divorce industry is to protect women from the big, bad men who are trying
to
manipulate them. The truth is women who are surveyed are very satisfied
with the divorce system because they get more than a fair share of
everything AND they feel in control of the process because of their
gender.

It has not been my experience that pushing the envelope when you are
solidly on the law and facts isn't a problem. If you attempt to "bull****"
the courts then you are in for hell week. There indeed IS a bias, however
you need to read Phyllis Chesler's book "Mothers on Trial" where sdhe
biutches endlessly that men fight for custody at all. One woman who Chesler
(and the feminazis) defend to the hilt was a woman one of the women Chesler
and radical feminists championed was Kathleen Gradi of Dallas, Texas as a
"GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!" Ms Gradi who lost custody of her son and daughter in
1979 to their father following an incident where she fractured the skull of
her daughter AImee and rammed a screwdriver through the right eye of her son
Clifford after beating him in a closet! Police found the child screaming in
a pool of blood. Gradi had broken more than one chair over the girl's head.
THIS, proclaimed the Feminists should NOT disqualify her from having SOLE
and TOTAL custody! She was, as the Feminists say a "GOOD ENOUGH MOTHER!"
Good enough for what?

I never paid a penny of my ex's lawyer's fees, SHE paid some of mine!



Look - it takes LITTLE skill to win for a woman. In 90% of the cases
all
a lawyer needs to do is say; "look judge my client has boobs" and he
wins.
It takes skill to win for a dad. It's that bias thing you were speaking
about. It makes it difficult and it makes it expensive to win, not
impossible. That lawyer never had to work before he represented women
and
his heart wasn't in representing a man.

This theory seems to run counter to the well documented concept of
"negotiating in the shadow of the law." Fathers have two choices - accept
their attorney's knowledge of how the courts like to rule, or fight the
system. The latter option costs a lot of money and the results are
questionable.

NEVER just "accept" that somebody knows what they are doing. I might
agree that many law people know MORE than 90% of the lawyers who practice
law about the law. Most lawyers flatly don't give a ****. They have their JD
and their license and it is "caveat emptorer" (let the buyer beware).
Remember the old saying about the word ASS/U/ME! EDUCATE YOURSELF! Make
sure your lawye does a complete job! Half assing things gets you in the
hole. When representing a MAN in a domestic case a lawyer can never leave
ANYTHING to chance. Leave one tack for a judge to hang his hat on and screw
you and they will! You can't leave any tacks.

Reasonable expectations is to WIN................!! Unless you want
to lose.

Actually, a reasonable expectation is to have the opposing party negotiate
in good faith, be honest about the facts and circumstances, and be willing
to compromise. I fought the system hard because of dirty trick
negotiation
tactics used by my ex and her attorney, gross misrepresentations about her
lifestyle to the mediators and the court, personal attacks on me that were
baseless, her lying under oath, and her desire to end up with 100% of
everything and me sitting in jail. I paid the price for standing up
against
these types of tactics. And the judge protected my ex from having to be
responsible for her unreasonable actions.

If people acted in good faith we'd not need courts! If people acted in
good faith you wouldn't be getting a divorce! It is human nature, when
people are guilty they BLAME THE VICTIM. My first wife's lawyer LOST his
license to practice law! How? Well *I* caught his ass in having "ALTERED"
the final decree in the court file. Then TRYING to mislead the court with
the FAKE order! Last I heard he was mounting tires on cars at the B.F.
Goodrich store.

Don't ever go into a gunflight at the Courthouse at the O.K. coral with
an EMPTY GUN! ALWAYS have the FACTS and the LAW with you.
Bob - I have seen many situations like yours in the past 30 years. When I
went over the file with the men it was not hard to prove to them where they
dropped the ball (or more correctly their lawyer did). The law is a very
exactling mistress. If you ever read the book "Ali Baba and the 40 Theives"
or if you saw one of the movies (time for a remake Hollywierd) you may
recall that the magic cave of the Theives would only open if you said "Open
Sesame" and if you said anything else the cave would not open. The law is
the same way. "ALMOST" only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and nuclear
war. You can't ALMOST put on a good case, as a man you must put on a PERFECT
case ot LOSE! Fair? No! But neither is winning impossible! If you want to
watch the movie you have to pay the price to get into the theater.

Interesting situation you have. You'll need to remember you may not have
say in what "penalty" is handed to your ex. Theoretically, you could do
more damage to your daughter than the good you're pursing -- only time
will tell. Eventually, we will all answert to our children and God.

Interesting situation you have. You'll need to remember you may not have
say in what "penalty" is handed to your ex. Theoretically, you could do
more damage to your daughter than the good you're pursing -- only time
will tell. Eventually, we will all answert to our children and God.

Interesting situation you have. You'll need to remember you may not have
say in what "penalty" is handed to your ex. Theoretically, you could do
more damage to your daughter than the good you're pursing -- only time
will tell. Eventually, we will all answert to our children and God.

dwalker1 wrote:
Interesting situation you have. You'll need to remember you may not have
say in what "penalty" is handed to your ex. Theoretically, you could do
more damage to your daughter than the good you're pursing -- only time
will tell. Eventually, we will all answert to our children and God.


Hi Darrian:

Every action I take in life is taken only after careful consideration of
how my daughter will be affected. I'm curious to know more about the
theory you mentioned, the one in which pursuing enforcement of the
custody order my ex and I agreed to could possibly do my daughter more
harm than good. I honestly don't think that's likely at all.

I understand that for those, like you, who are not familiar with details
of my case, and of the hell my daughter's mom has put my daughter and me
through for the last 8 years, my actions and my objectives might sound
extreme. Well, I guess they are extreme. But extreme and prolonged
abuses require an extreme response. Like I said in my original post,
I've tried everything I can to peacefully resolve/end the custody
interference and parental alientation my ex insists on perpetrating--
without taking legal action.

I don't know if you have children Darrian, but try to imagine promising
your little girl, after planning with her a fun-filled weekend of
activities, that you will be there to pick her up at a specific time and
place, only to have her taken away. How do you explain what happened
when you see her next? Keep in mind that you must not say anything
negative about the person who took them. What do you say? And what
message do you think the poor child, who is old enough to know that her
mom is breaking the rules, is getting when she gets taken away? Here's
a few that I've thought of: 1) Dad is unimportant. 2) Rules and laws are
unimportant. 3) Promises are unimportant. This is more than a lost
weekend between father and daughter--it's emotional abuse of a child!

When somebody abuses your child, you have to do something -- don't you?
Maybe the god you mentioned would want you to forgive and forget, or
something righteous like that. That's my initial instinct, too, until
it occurs to me that doing so will almost certainly result, eventually,
in my child growing up without a father. Doing nothing provides
implicit approval of the crime. In fact, doing nothing can be
interpreted by the court as having WAIVED YOUR CUSTODY RIGHTS. It
happened to me.

Darrian, I'm tired of being forced to break promises I make to my
innocent daughter because her mom won't obey the law. I have promised
my daughter that I will pick her up on Friday, only to have that promise
broken because mom takes her away. For the last time! This scenario,
repeated over and over, is typical of my life as a dedicated father
trying to have a relationship with a child who is, in her "best
interest" (hahahaha), in the primary care of a bitter, sociopathic
(IMHO) mother.

I pursue this action with complete confidence (based on years of
watching the family court let mom violate orders with complete impunity)
that neither the family court judge, nor the police, will penalize my
daughter's mom to the degree that will cause my daughter to suffer any
more than she is suffering now.

It understand that it may be hard to believe if you don't know the
details (which are far too extensive for posting to a newsgroup), but
jail or a large fine for her mom may actually be the *best* thing,
long-term, for my little girl. It might result in her relationship with
her dad being unencumbered for what is left of her childhood.

Thanks for adding to the discussion. I sense you are concerned that my
daughter will be harmed if I'm successful in prosecuting. Don't worry,
I've thought of all the possible outcomes and I don't see that happening.

It appears the 278.5 criminal case is dead in the water, but I will post
here the results of the contempt case when they are available.
Arraignment is July 6th.

Jay R.

dwalker1 wrote:
Interesting situation you have. You'll need to remember you may not have
say in what "penalty" is handed to your ex. Theoretically, you could do
more damage to your daughter than the good you're pursing -- only time
will tell. Eventually, we will all answert to our children and God.


Hi Darrian:

Every action I take in life is taken only after careful consideration of
how my daughter will be affected. I'm curious to know more about the
theory you mentioned, the one in which pursuing enforcement of the
custody order my ex and I agreed to could possibly do my daughter more
harm than good. I honestly don't think that's likely at all.

I understand that for those, like you, who are not familiar with details
of my case, and of the hell my daughter's mom has put my daughter and me
through for the last 8 years, my actions and my objectives might sound
extreme. Well, I guess they are extreme. But extreme and prolonged
abuses require an extreme response. Like I said in my original post,
I've tried everything I can to peacefully resolve/end the custody
interference and parental alientation my ex insists on perpetrating--
without taking legal action.

I don't know if you have children Darrian, but try to imagine promising
your little girl, after planning with her a fun-filled weekend of
activities, that you will be there to pick her up at a specific time and
place, only to have her taken away. How do you explain what happened
when you see her next? Keep in mind that you must not say anything
negative about the person who took them. What do you say? And what
message do you think the poor child, who is old enough to know that her
mom is breaking the rules, is getting when she gets taken away? Here's
a few that I've thought of: 1) Dad is unimportant. 2) Rules and laws are
unimportant. 3) Promises are unimportant. This is more than a lost
weekend between father and daughter--it's emotional abuse of a child!

When somebody abuses your child, you have to do something -- don't you?
Maybe the god you mentioned would want you to forgive and forget, or
something righteous like that. That's my initial instinct, too, until
it occurs to me that doing so will almost certainly result, eventually,
in my child growing up without a father. Doing nothing provides
implicit approval of the crime. In fact, doing nothing can be
interpreted by the court as having WAIVED YOUR CUSTODY RIGHTS. It
happened to me.

Darrian, I'm tired of being forced to break promises I make to my
innocent daughter because her mom won't obey the law. I have promised
my daughter that I will pick her up on Friday, only to have that promise
broken because mom takes her away. For the last time! This scenario,
repeated over and over, is typical of my life as a dedicated father
trying to have a relationship with a child who is, in her "best
interest" (hahahaha), in the primary care of a bitter, sociopathic
(IMHO) mother.

I pursue this action with complete confidence (based on years of
watching the family court let mom violate orders with complete impunity)
that neither the family court judge, nor the police, will penalize my
daughter's mom to the degree that will cause my daughter to suffer any
more than she is suffering now.

It understand that it may be hard to believe if you don't know the
details (which are far too extensive for posting to a newsgroup), but
jail or a large fine for her mom may actually be the *best* thing,
long-term, for my little girl. It might result in her relationship with
her dad being unencumbered for what is left of her childhood.

Thanks for adding to the discussion. I sense you are concerned that my
daughter will be harmed if I'm successful in prosecuting. Don't worry,
I've thought of all the possible outcomes and I don't see that happening.

It appears the 278.5 criminal case is dead in the water, but I will post
here the results of the contempt case when they are available.
Arraignment is July 6th.

Jay R.

dwalker1 wrote:
Interesting situation you have. You'll need to remember you may not have
say in what "penalty" is handed to your ex. Theoretically, you could do
more damage to your daughter than the good you're pursing -- only time
will tell. Eventually, we will all answert to our children and God.


Hi Darrian:

Every action I take in life is taken only after careful consideration of
how my daughter will be affected. I'm curious to know more about the
theory you mentioned, the one in which pursuing enforcement of the
custody order my ex and I agreed to could possibly do my daughter more
harm than good. I honestly don't think that's likely at all.

I understand that for those, like you, who are not familiar with details
of my case, and of the hell my daughter's mom has put my daughter and me
through for the last 8 years, my actions and my objectives might sound
extreme. Well, I guess they are extreme. But extreme and prolonged
abuses require an extreme response. Like I said in my original post,
I've tried everything I can to peacefully resolve/end the custody
interference and parental alientation my ex insists on perpetrating--
without taking legal action.

I don't know if you have children Darrian, but try to imagine promising
your little girl, after planning with her a fun-filled weekend of
activities, that you will be there to pick her up at a specific time and
place, only to have her taken away. How do you explain what happened
when you see her next? Keep in mind that you must not say anything
negative about the person who took them. What do you say? And what
message do you think the poor child, who is old enough to know that her
mom is breaking the rules, is getting when she gets taken away? Here's
a few that I've thought of: 1) Dad is unimportant. 2) Rules and laws are
unimportant. 3) Promises are unimportant. This is more than a lost
weekend between father and daughter--it's emotional abuse of a child!

When somebody abuses your child, you have to do something -- don't you?
Maybe the god you mentioned would want you to forgive and forget, or
something righteous like that. That's my initial instinct, too, until
it occurs to me that doing so will almost certainly result, eventually,
in my child growing up without a father. Doing nothing provides
implicit approval of the crime. In fact, doing nothing can be
interpreted by the court as having WAIVED YOUR CUSTODY RIGHTS. It
happened to me.

Darrian, I'm tired of being forced to break promises I make to my
innocent daughter because her mom won't obey the law. I have promised
my daughter that I will pick her up on Friday, only to have that promise
broken because mom takes her away. For the last time! This scenario,
repeated over and over, is typical of my life as a dedicated father
trying to have a relationship with a child who is, in her "best
interest" (hahahaha), in the primary care of a bitter, sociopathic
(IMHO) mother.

I pursue this action with complete confidence (based on years of
watching the family court let mom violate orders with complete impunity)
that neither the family court judge, nor the police, will penalize my
daughter's mom to the degree that will cause my daughter to suffer any
more than she is suffering now.

It understand that it may be hard to believe if you don't know the
details (which are far too extensive for posting to a newsgroup), but
jail or a large fine for her mom may actually be the *best* thing,
long-term, for my little girl. It might result in her relationship with
her dad being unencumbered for what is left of her childhood.

Thanks for adding to the discussion. I sense you are concerned that my
daughter will be harmed if I'm successful in prosecuting. Don't worry,
I've thought of all the possible outcomes and I don't see that happening.

It appears the 278.5 criminal case is dead in the water, but I will post
here the results of the contempt case when they are available.
Arraignment is July 6th.

Jay R.