woman in the park

For some reason I have been meeting alot of Moms my sons age who don't
breastfeed. I met this woman today who's son is the same age as mine, 5
months. I asked her if she breastfed and she said she couldn't be bothered.
She had no good reason other than she just didn't want to bother with it.
She was also complaining about her son not being able to gain weight. I'm
sure if she had the conversation with one of you guys you would have told
her how beneficial the breast milk is but I didn't say anything.
Kris

"K.B." wrote
For some reason I have been meeting alot of Moms my sons age who don't
breastfeed. I met this woman today who's son is the same age as mine, 5
months. I asked her if she breastfed and she said she couldn't be
bothered.
She had no good reason other than she just didn't want to bother with it.
She was also complaining about her son not being able to gain weight. I'm
sure if she had the conversation with one of you guys you would have told
her how beneficial the breast milk is but I didn't say anything.
Kris

Actually, I'd tell her that he could have a dairy intolerence and point out
all the stuff in formula that could be contributing to his poor weight gain.

My DD couldn't gain weight without being on high-calorie formula while she
was getting supplements. Once I weaned her off the formula and she got only
breastmilk, her weight gain took off. When I tried to introduce yoghurt and
cheese she reacted to it, so I've kept her off all dairy. She's the only
child I know of who gained more weight in the second six months than in the
first!

Jean
--
HOLLY: Nothing wrong with dog's milk. Full of goodness, full of
vitamins, full of marrowbone jelly. Lasts longer than any other type
of milk, dog's milk.
LISTER: Why?
HOLLY: No bugger'll drink it. Plus the advantage of dog's milk is when
it goes off it takes exactly the same as when it's fresh.
LISTER: Why didn't you tell me, Holly?!
HOLLY: What, and spoil your tea?
(Red Dwarf: Series 2, Episode 1)

"K.B." wrote in message
hlink.net...
For some reason I have been meeting alot of Moms my sons age who don't
breastfeed. I met this woman today who's son is the same age as mine, 5
months. I asked her if she breastfed and she said she couldn't be
bothered.
She had no good reason other than she just didn't want to bother with it.
She was also complaining about her son not being able to gain weight. I'm
sure if she had the conversation with one of you guys you would have told
her how beneficial the breast milk is but I didn't say anything.
Kris



I'm a bit like you - I hate telling others what they "should" do (as I know
I hate getting unsolicited advice myself).
I guess the way I deal with it is to be very proud of bf my DD for this long
(14 mo and still going) and just talk about the benefits that *I've* found
(like not having to buy and mix formula, wash and sterilise bottles, being
able to leave the house at a moment's notice with a healthy and nutritious
drink for DD "onboard", and being able to spend extra $$ on treats as I
don't have to pay so much money for formula and doctors bills etc).
I will correct anybody if they tell me a mistruth in such a way that they
are implying that what I'm doing is somehow wrong, but usually I just offer
my perspective on the positives of bf ... and then just feel really sorry
for the child if it falls on deaf ears.

Perhaps she feels guilty about her son's poor weight gain and her lack of
interest in bf and covers this by being so blasé about it.
Its hard to know how to handle such situations.
Amanda

"K.B." wrote in message
hlink.net...
For some reason I have been meeting alot of Moms my sons age who don't
breastfeed. I met this woman today who's son is the same age as mine, 5
months. I asked her if she breastfed and she said she couldn't be
bothered.
She had no good reason other than she just didn't want to bother with it.
She was also complaining about her son not being able to gain weight. I'm
sure if she had the conversation with one of you guys you would have told
her how beneficial the breast milk is but I didn't say anything.
Kris

No. Why would I go on about the benefits of bm to a mom that *doesn't*
nurse. What's she going to do, relactate at 5 months pp? It's not my place.
Especially someone I just met. If I met a mom-to-be who was on the fence,
then yes, I would try to say some positive things about bf.

As for saying she couldn't be bothered, well, at least she was honest.
--
JennP.

mom to Matthew 10/11/00
remove "no........spam" to reply

" Actually, I'd tell her that he could have a dairy intolerence and point
out
all the stuff in formula that could be contributing to his poor weight
gain.

My DD couldn't gain weight without being on high-calorie formula while she
was getting supplements. Once I weaned her off the formula and she got
only
breastmilk, her weight gain took off. When I tried to introduce yoghurt
and
cheese she reacted to it, so I've kept her off all dairy. She's the only
child I know of who gained more weight in the second six months than in
the
first!

Jean

I did tell her about my older son's food allergies and his slow weight gain.
She wasn't very interested.
Kris

No. Why would I go on about the benefits of bm to a mom that *doesn't*
nurse. What's she going to do, relactate at 5 months pp? It's not my
place.
Especially someone I just met. If I met a mom-to-be who was on the fence,
then yes, I would try to say some positive things about bf.

As for saying she couldn't be bothered, well, at least she was honest.
--
JennP.

mom to Matthew 10/11/00
remove "no........spam" to reply

Actually she was lactating and nursed a little before now. She doean't like
to be bothered with bf so she gives him a bottle instead of her milk. Your
right though. at least she was honest. It was her comments on bf and a few
other things she said that got to me a little. She just didn't seem like she
enjoyed Motherhood too much.
Kris

K.B. wrote:

I'm sure if she had the conversation with one of you guys you would have told
her how beneficial the breast milk is but I didn't say anything.

With a 5 month old, I wouldn't have. If she couldn't be
bothered to bf, she isn't going to want to relactate, and at
5 months, she probably couldn't relactate successfully.

Phoebe
--
yahoo address is unread - substitute mailbolt

"K.B." wrote in message
hlink.net...

Actually she was lactating and nursed a little before now. She doean't
like
to be bothered with bf so she gives him a bottle instead of her milk.

Sounds like she is nursing and is maybe in the process of weaning.

Your
right though. at least she was honest. It was her comments on bf and a few
other things she said that got to me a little. She just didn't seem like
she
enjoyed Motherhood too much.
Kris

Sounds like maybe she's got some other issues going on. I know it's
dissapointing to see other moms not enjoying bf like we do, but
unfortunately, there are moms out there who do have quite a bit of trouble
(depression maybe, in this mom's case?) and it is *not* enjoyable. At least
her baby had *some* bm for 5 months.

--
JennP.

mom to Matthew 10/11/00
remove "no........spam" to reply

K.B. wrote:

" Actually, I'd tell her that he could have a dairy intolerence and point
out

all the stuff in formula that could be contributing to his poor weight

gain.

My DD couldn't gain weight without being on high-calorie formula while she
was getting supplements. Once I weaned her off the formula and she got

only

breastmilk, her weight gain took off. When I tried to introduce yoghurt

and

cheese she reacted to it, so I've kept her off all dairy. She's the only
child I know of who gained more weight in the second six months than in

the

first!

Jean


I did tell her about my older son's food allergies and his slow weight gain.
She wasn't very interested.
Kris


All I can say is at least she didn't start off with some story about how
she oh-so-*wanted* to bfeed, but oh-so-sadly couldn't. She just flatly
said she couldn't be bothered.

I'd have pulled out Mary S.'s hubby's line "It's a committment" for this
woman. It's probably too late to relactate if she couln't be bothered
when the milk WAS there already.

Dawn

"K.B." wrote in message thlink.net...
I'm
sure if she had the conversation with one of you guys you would have told
her how beneficial the breast milk is but I didn't say anything.
Kris

Nah, I'd be want to really try to understand her point of view -- why
it seemed like so much more of a "bother" than formula feeding. I
might disagree with one or two of her points if I could do so politely
and thought she might reconsider if she had another baby.

I had a friend of mine from medical school -- this woman is now a
*doctor* -- tell me she wasn't sure if she would breastfeed her (at
this point hypothetical) future children for more than a few weeks.
Now in that circumstance I will argue with her until the cows come
home, because she's a good friend and no way in hell am I going to let
a good friend formula feed without my trying to convince her
otherwise.

Kate
and the Bug, June 8 2003