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#91
September 5th 05, 05:19 PM
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Jill wrote: On Mon, 05 Sep 2005 11:10:48 -0400, Werebat wrote: Still waiting for an answer to this one -- won't get it, I know, because you don't have one. It's much more comfortable seething in your own little pool of anger, isn't it? Heh. Fell into my trap, huh? You keep responding to something no one else cares about. Looks like all of your "jokes" are on you. I guess what I find so interesting here is why you choose to spew so much vitriol over an obvious joke post. In a separate thread. I mean, I obviously hit a raw nerve with what I wrote. If you just didn't find it funny, you would've said to yourself, "Meh, whatever" and left it at that. I'm sure lots of other people did. But what you write here indicates that you are actually quite angry about it. It goes beyond not finding the post particularly funny. It makes me wonder about your own issues. Normal people do not blow up about things like that. 
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#93
September 6th 05, 12:34 AM
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Okay you all assume I'm a woman for my use of puncuation.
Interesting. And you all think I might be of the female gender because of use of language, and my idea of concepts. Again interesting. You can all feel free to think what you want.. I really don't care. I know I'm a Man. But I happen to be a Single Father of an Autistic Child. Educated, and have formed my own opinions. Now if you want to talk hard rational numbers, I understand those as well. I do understand that some of my fellow men are being pulled through the coals, and being left with nothing but the shirt on their backs. But again, and I've mentioned this in previous argumets in other posts, alot of these fellow men didn't bother to take the time to plan their life out a little more prior to commiting to an act. Instead lived in the moment, and still do. But I, like some other men I know, decided to take the needed percautions to ensure that my Ex-Wife would not be able to screw me in the event of a divorce.. Again no lawyers hired here, just simply read the needed literature. Secondly, I also made sure that before my Ex was able to pull any kind of tricks on me, I was 2 step ahead of her, and had everything in place. Again this was not magic, just simple life planning. Now do to the Special Needs nature of my son, being harsh with him accomplishes nothing as he does not understand disicpline in the same manner you and I do. As a result I have found that that this same calm nature I have around my son, carries on into the rest my life. There is a saying, you can attract more flies with Honey then Vinegar. Also as a result of being a Sigle Father I have that I do indeed need to pick up where my Ex Wife left off. If that means the rest of you all think of me as some Wuss Ass.. then fine.. Thats your Right. But here is the Distinct difference between myself and the rest of the people I hear about on here. I have managed to get everything I wanted, and done it within the current laws as they exsist. And I didn't do it by getting really ****ed off and throwing a Temper tantrum. I did it by taking a lesson from good old Mom. Did your mom teach you when things don't go your way, to rant and rave. No good old Mom taught us to stop, evaluate, and move on. And I apologize if this was a harsh Lesson to learn... SpiderHam77
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#94
September 6th 05, 01:55 AM
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"SpiderHam77" wrote in message oups.com... Okay you all assume I'm a woman for my use of puncuation. Interesting. And you all think I might be of the female gender because of use of language, and my idea of concepts. Again interesting. You can all feel free to think what you want.. I really don't care. I know I'm a Man. But I happen to be a Single Father of an Autistic Child. Educated, and have formed my own opinions. Now if you want to talk hard rational numbers, I understand those as well. I do understand that some of my fellow men are being pulled through the coals, and being left with nothing but the shirt on their backs. But again, and I've mentioned this in previous argumets in other posts, alot of these fellow men didn't bother to take the time to plan their life out a little more prior to commiting to an act. Instead lived in the moment, and still do. IMO, most don't realize how irrationally courts decide such matters as custody and support amounts until after coming out of that meat grinder. Few people actually go into a relationship planning for it's demise. That you were foresighted enough to realize yours would likely end is your good fortune but not a foresight shared by many, compared to the number who enter into relationships. But I, like some other men I know, decided to take the needed percautions to ensure that my Ex-Wife would not be able to screw me in the event of a divorce.. Again no lawyers hired here, just simply read the needed literature. Which is why a "truth in marrige" act is needed; children should be studying the likelihood of divorce and the after effects long before marriage and childbearing is optional. Secondly, I also made sure that before my Ex was able to pull any kind of tricks on me, I was 2 step ahead of her, and had everything in place. Again this was not magic, just simple life planning. Now do to the Special Needs nature of my son, being harsh with him accomplishes nothing as he does not understand disicpline in the same manner you and I do. As a result I have found that that this same calm nature I have around my son, carries on into the rest my life. There is a saying, you can attract more flies with Honey then Vinegar. Also as a result of being a Sigle Father I have that I do indeed need to pick up where my Ex Wife left off. If that means the rest of you all think of me as some Wuss Ass.. then fine.. Thats your Right. But here is the Distinct difference between myself and the rest of the people I hear about on here. I have managed to get everything I wanted, and done it within the current laws as they exsist. One person winning a lottery does nothing for those who didn't. If, in fact, you are a father and everything you've said here is true, you are an anomaly. I suspect your ex didn't want custody but would never expect you to admit it. And I didn't do it by getting really ****ed off and throwing a Temper tantrum. I did it by taking a lesson from good old Mom. Did your mom teach you when things don't go your way, to rant and rave. No good old Mom taught us to stop, evaluate, and move on. And I apologize if this was a harsh Lesson to learn... No, my dad told me the difference between right and wrong but he died before feminism's experiment in social engineering started screwing up society to such an extent as seen today where 'rights and wrongs' are often based on one's sex. Your acceptance of wrongs does nothing to correct the problems for the next generation. In fact, you have become an apoligist for an evil system. By the way, the last paragraph you wrote is an example of why some, me included, think you are female. You allude to 'ranting and raving' as if posting the wrongs of the system (discussion) is somehow an example of "throwing a Temper tantrum". This is a prime example of the writings of one involved in gender feminism. Phil #3 SpiderHam77
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#95
September 6th 05, 02:31 AM
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Well my Ex did want Custody of my Son. And tried to fight to get it.
Went to great lengths to try and show I was an abusive Man, that I beat her on occasions, even tried to have me arrested one time when she came to pick my Son up for a Visitation on the Basis that I slapped her. The Police arrived, took a look at the Situation and decided to take her into custody for making a False Statement. I didn't know the officers as they were part of the National Police Force in Canada known as the RCMP. I even offered up to her the idea of Joint Custody at the start of all this because I wanted to encourage peaceful Dialogue between myself, her and our Son. But she wanted Sole Custody, and I wasn't going to allow that as she wanted to leave the Country with him back to the US. So the Judge simply ruled due to the nature of my Son's condition, the fact that he was enrolled in Specialized Therapy here in the Vancouver Area, and that I was able to provide a stable home environment. Going into the Marriage I didn't go into it expecting it to Fail. As a matter of fact I did truely love my wife at the time. But as a rational person I decided to get all my ducks in a row prior to commiting myself to something. I use the terminology I do, as I that is what I equate alot of what I read in here.. Ranting and Raving about how the Big Nasty Woman was able to take advantage of the Poor Little Man. And well I call an Ace and Ace, and Spade a Spade. If there was less bitching, and more insightful interlude as to how to correct this problem. Then I would use a different Term. And would love to discuss solutions to the problem that make sense for the Country as a whole. But to date I've seen nothing but examples being throw into the ring about how a Man was screwed over. Not by being taken advantge of, or against his will, but by his own Stupidity for not doing what I have mentioned and thinking about his actions prior to making them. Now I have heard about this Rape Case you all keep harping on... and there might be a few of them out there.. but they still represent maybe a Dozen Cases through out the Country, and are all with Minors. They do not represent the Majority of the Country. SpiderHam77
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#96
September 6th 05, 03:06 AM
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"SpiderHam77" wrote in message ups.com... Well my Ex did want Custody of my Son. And tried to fight to get it. Went to great lengths to try and show I was an abusive Man, that I beat her on occasions, even tried to have me arrested one time when she came to pick my Son up for a Visitation on the Basis that I slapped her. The Police arrived, took a look at the Situation and decided to take her into custody for making a False Statement. I didn't know the officers as they were part of the National Police Force in Canada known as the RCMP. You're just fortunate. In the states, it is very likely you would have been arrested for domestic abuse, jailed then found guilty without any evidence whatsoever. I even offered up to her the idea of Joint Custody at the start of all this because I wanted to encourage peaceful Dialogue between myself, her and our Son. But she wanted Sole Custody, and I wasn't going to allow that as she wanted to leave the Country with him back to the US. So the Judge simply ruled due to the nature of my Son's condition, the fact that he was enrolled in Specialized Therapy here in the Vancouver Area, and that I was able to provide a stable home environment. Again, you're just fortunate. Your tale goes so differently than most I've ever heard of, I can only say you must be the token CP father. Going into the Marriage I didn't go into it expecting it to Fail. As a matter of fact I did truely love my wife at the time. But as a rational person I decided to get all my ducks in a row prior to commiting myself to something. And had the judge thrown out your prenup, awarded custody to your ex and forced you to supply her with 30% of your gross income, you'd be in the shoes of the men here who you seem to find detestible. I use the terminology I do, as I that is what I equate alot of what I read in here.. Ranting and Raving about how the Big Nasty Woman was able to take advantage of the Poor Little Man. Define "Ranting and Raving". Please stop capitalizing words incorrectly, it makes you look stupid. And well I call an Ace and Ace, and Spade a Spade. If there was less bitching, and more insightful interlude as to how to correct this problem. Then I would use a different Term. And would love to discuss solutions to the problem that make sense for the Country as a whole. I doubt it. Your tale is incredible, IMO. But to date I've seen nothing but examples being throw into the ring about how a Man was screwed over. Not by being taken advantge of, or against his will, but by his own Stupidity for not doing what I have mentioned and thinking about his actions prior to making them. You see only what you want to see. If you were in the shoes of the NCPs, you'd see things a bit differently. Now I have heard about this Rape Case you all keep harping on... and there might be a few of them out there.. but they still represent maybe a Dozen Cases through out the Country, and are all with Minors. They do not represent the Majority of the Country. They are rulings of the court that you claim is based on the desires of the "Majority", ergo, it is the will of the majority. It's bull**** but that's your claim in a nutshell. You have yet to explain why fathers are not simply treated as equal parents to mothers when it comes to divorce, custody and child support. Why *should* a father have to protect himself from eventualities from which the mother does not have to also protect herself? When you answer than question, you'll maybe understand that courts and law are mother-centric, based on propaganda and innuendo, not fact. Phil #3 SpiderHam77
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#97
September 6th 05, 04:48 AM
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I agree with you. Father should be treated as equals at the terms of
divorce untill proven otherwise. And more and more courts re reconizing this fact. And I encourage the push for fathers rights. However I lived in the system, and worked through the system. And you are correct in saying that currently more favour is put towards the women. So for now we have to learn to work within the laws at hand, and how they are ruled, and in essence beat some of these women at their own game. If a father is ready and willing to take on the idea of Joint Custody, then it should be awarded unless other wise proven that one parent is unfit to raise a child. And to be able to be proven unfit it would have be through court appointed people to observe this, not just the ramblings of one parent accusing the other of something. However that said. One of the reasons woman have recieve custody is due to the fact that when custody is being decided the father is no where to be seen. Now this is due to a number of reasons. I stand firm on Fathers Rights, and fellow fathers will always have my support, as long as they are trying to be a father to their children, and not just bitching about having to pay child support. Because as a few people have pointed out, there is a distinct difference between a paycheque and a father. SpiderHam77
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#98
September 6th 05, 06:05 AM
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"Dusty" wrote in message ... "Bob Whiteside" wrote in message k.net... [snip] I kinda liked the Lesbian Avengers who didn't like how their bisexual friend was being treated, our Yuma buddy and his on again/off again gender representation and prison record, the Internet webmistress who did fully nude but tasteful fashion modeling, and good old William the fisherman/boat salesman/attorney. ;-) Damn! I missed the Lesbian Avengers?!? Now I'm really depressed. Yeah! They hated everyone who was obviously male or had a screen name that might indicate they could be a man. They just went ballistic over women like Tracy, Indyguy, and Ivyjade2 who they assumed were men. They hated hetero women who liked men and went after them too. They were gay gals on steroids to the extreme!
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#99
September 6th 05, 02:11 PM
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"SpiderHam77" wrote in message oups.com... I agree with you. Father should be treated as equals at the terms of divorce untill proven otherwise. And more and more courts re reconizing this fact. And I encourage the push for fathers rights. However I lived in the system, and worked through the system. And you are correct in saying that currently more favour is put towards the women. So for now we have to learn to work within the laws at hand, and how they are ruled, and in essence beat some of these women at their own game. You mean men need to file first and go for blood? If so, you are correct but perhaps a better system would be to refuse to 1) marry or co-habitate; 2) vasectomy. If a father is ready and willing to take on the idea of Joint Custody, then it should be awarded unless other wise proven that one parent is unfit to raise a child. And to be able to be proven unfit it would have be through court appointed people to observe this, not just the ramblings of one parent accusing the other of something. However that said. One of the reasons woman have recieve custody is due to the fact that when custody is being decided the father is no where to be seen. Now this is due to a number of reasons. Please expand because it sounds like you're saying men are 'hiding out' as opposed to 'kicked out'. You seem to be trying to lessen the effect of TROs and other manipulations to gain the upper hand in divorce. Most attorneys will admit that a man trying to gain custody after the mother has filed for divorce is unlikely to gain it and can only be done against her wishes by destroying the mother's reputation by proving her unfit. This usually costs at least $50k, ($80 Can). In short, it is all legal language and positioning; nothing about the children's best interests. I stand firm on Fathers Rights, and fellow fathers will always have my support, as long as they are trying to be a father to their children, and not just bitching about having to pay child support. You appear to think that one presupposes the other; if a father is unhappy about the amount of money he is forced to send to the mother, it does not mean he is not trying to be a father while at the same time paying support may not benefit the child. You seem to be making the classic error of assuming child support is supporting children. Phil #3 Because as a few people have pointed out, there is a distinct difference between a paycheque and a father. SpiderHam77
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#100
September 6th 05, 02:19 PM
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"SpiderHam77" wrote in message
oups.com... Okay you all assume I'm a woman for my use of puncuation. Interesting. And you all think I might be of the female gender because of use of language, and my idea of concepts. Again interesting. SpiderHam77 No. That was my point. I am not assuming you are anything other than what you say you are. I think it is ludicrous for some to claim that one can reason out which gender a person is based on punctuation. -- Rhiannon "Do we operate under a system of equal justice under law? Or is there one system for the average citizen and another for the high and mighty?" -- Senator Ted Kennedy, 1973 "Seems it all depends on who is driving which car into which river Senator." -- Anon
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