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#1
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Incessant, relentless talking and needing constant attention.
My partner two girls, 4 and 2 years old. The 2 year old almost looks
after herself and amuses herself endlessly with whatever can be found around. The 4 year old is relentless in her need for attention. She constantly has to be talking, commentating on everything, interrupting etc. Even her internal thought process is entirely verbalised. How can we help her to find pleasure in silence now and again? It's exhausting just to listen to her! I can imagine people reading this thinking that such talking should be encouraged, but I've spent a lot of time with different children (mum was a child minder), and this is really something else. Brien |
#2
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How can we help her to find pleasure in silence now and again? It's
exhausting just to listen to her! My mom says I used to be like that - she would just tell me she was tired of listening to me and to go talk in my room. And I would. I don't remember that so I don't think it was too tramatizing for me not to have everyone hanging on every word. Give her a timer...say she can talk you this long and then she has to do somethign else. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle |
#3
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On Mon, 20 Dec 2004 08:22:22 +0000, Brien wrote:
My partner two girls, 4 and 2 years old. The 2 year old almost looks after herself and amuses herself endlessly with whatever can be found around. The 4 year old is relentless in her need for attention. She constantly has to be talking, commentating on everything, interrupting etc. Even her internal thought process is entirely verbalised. How can we help her to find pleasure in silence now and again? It's exhausting just to listen to her! I can imagine people reading this thinking that such talking should be encouraged, but I've spent a lot of time with different children (mum was a child minder), and this is really something else. Get a timer, and use it! One of my boys was like this, but in smaller doses. What I did was plan out the next hour or so with him. "Let's cuddle on the couch for 20 minutes and you can tell me about school today, then I have to get dinner started. While the potatoes are in the oven, we can play Uno until the timer goes off. Be sure that she has 100% of your attention when it's supposed to be "her" time, and that way you can teach her to respect "your" time or "reading" time or "quiet" time or whatever as well. lm |
#4
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Did this personality begin when the little sister came on board? Maybe
the older one feels the need for competition for attention? Have you treated the little one more special? I have heard that such talking should be encouraged, too. I'm not sure I'd discourage it. Perhaps, make sure there's one-on-one time without the little sister around so the older one is more satisfied. Maybe things will iron out when the 2 year old is older and she's listening to the older sister. I bet they'll make great confidants for each other. Karen |
#5
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"Brien" wrote in message ... My partner two girls, 4 and 2 years old. The 2 year old almost looks after herself and amuses herself endlessly with whatever can be found around. The 4 year old is relentless in her need for attention. She constantly has to be talking, commentating on everything, interrupting etc. Even her internal thought process is entirely verbalised. How can we help her to find pleasure in silence now and again? It's exhausting just to listen to her! I can imagine people reading this thinking that such talking should be encouraged, but I've spent a lot of time with different children (mum was a child minder), and this is really something else. Brien It doesn't go away, my boy is 10. Fortunately he has come to understand the coffee requirement before he gets going now. Who's idea was it to teach these kids how to walk and talk anyways? Lisa |
#6
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Subject: Incessant, relentless talking and needing constant attention.
From: Brien Date: 12/20/2004 3:22 AM Eastern Standard Time Message-id: My partner two girls, 4 and 2 years old. The 2 year old almost looks after herself and amuses herself endlessly with whatever can be found around. This sounds like my oldest daughter, she will be 23 this month and she still amuses herself nicely The 4 year old is relentless in her need for attention. She constantly has to be talking, commentating on everything, interrupting etc. Even her internal thought process is entirely verbalised. and this would be how my now 17 yr. old was/is and I think always will be. She even talks in her sleep ! LOL! How can we help her to find pleasure in silence now and again? It's exhausting just to listen to her! This is a very frustrating challenge I promise you.....I know the exhaustion is real......have you had the "look" yet as you have listened? Kinda mouth open eyes wide, and your head bobs up and down ? As others have already said ...I did find that to have her involved in some other activities would cut back on some of the babble...... Come time for school a whole new assortment of teachings came into play cause the babble went with her ! LOL! So we had to overcome the issues that brought to us. Teachers are great ! I can imagine people reading this thinking that such talking should be encouraged, but I've spent a lot of time with different children (mum was a child minder), and this is really something else. My daughter had been suspect for ADHD at 10 years old , ruled out, and now at 17 is being treated for ADHD ? I wonder if this babble trait for some is linked to this? I can say after years of constant reminders to wait her turn to talk , and some games during her earlier years in school that the teachers have used, and then there was the principal that would play a part in trying to discipline the behaviour, with detentions etc. She has gained some control . She doesn't talk with her mouth full anymore ! That was gross Bev P.S. good luck Brien |
#7
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My son babbles constantly. More times than not, We simply tell him to go to
his room if he has to talk... his door must be closed. We've had to set some really strict rules, especially when riding in the car. Along with that annoying chatter, my son makes sound effects so if he whines or makes a gasping noise, I find myself having to pull over. We've asked our therapist what to do about it. I've f ound myself sometimes telling my son that if he doesn't be quiet, he will find himself losing a priviledge. Sadly, it doesn't matter. We find ourselves thankful for school. Unfortunately, even his special ed teacher has found him to be annoying. My son is constantly chattering. The only time we ever hear anything BUT his voice is when he's asleep! I'd be very interested to see if there are any other ways to deal with this. My son is 8...... Unfortunately, I know exactly the frustration you're feeling. -- "Many have forgotten this truth, but you must not forget it. You remain responsible, forever, for what you have tamed." ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery "Brien" wrote in message ... My partner two girls, 4 and 2 years old. The 2 year old almost looks after herself and amuses herself endlessly with whatever can be found around. The 4 year old is relentless in her need for attention. She constantly has to be talking, commentating on everything, interrupting etc. Even her internal thought process is entirely verbalised. How can we help her to find pleasure in silence now and again? It's exhausting just to listen to her! I can imagine people reading this thinking that such talking should be encouraged, but I've spent a lot of time with different children (mum was a child minder), and this is really something else. Brien |
#8
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slykitten wrote:
My son babbles constantly. More times than not, We simply tell him to go to his room if he has to talk... his door must be closed. We've had to set some really strict rules, especially when riding in the car. Along with that annoying chatter, my son makes sound effects so if he whines or makes a gasping noise, I find myself having to pull over. We've asked our therapist what to do about it. I've f ound myself sometimes telling my son that if he doesn't be quiet, he will find himself losing a priviledge. Sadly, it doesn't matter. We find ourselves thankful for school. Unfortunately, even his special ed teacher has found him to be annoying. My son is constantly chattering. The only time we ever hear anything BUT his voice is when he's asleep! I'd be very interested to see if there are any other ways to deal with this. My son is 8...... Unfortunately, I know exactly the frustration you're feeling. Thanks for all of the feedback everyone!! Good to know we're not alone with the problem, and a few good suggestions in there. |
#9
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That's a really good idea. but the question becomes, what if he finds he
likes the vibrations? I mean, right now, even my 2 year old says, "shuuuuup!" because even as just a little one, she seems to get annoyed. My middle child (my older daughter) finds herself completely overpowered by his voice and sadly, this afternoon, for (I swear that this is true!) 2 hours, my son did nothing but babble, chatter and make noises. My middle kiddo put her hands over her ears and yelled at the top of her lungs, "SHUT UP! YOU BUG ME!!" and we ended up having to pull over. She was so mad that she was crying! We'll try the vibrations thing. I hope it works.... Another problem we're having with him is that he cusses. He never cusses at home but when he's at school, he'll let out a string that makes many a hardened man blush! We found this out when his teacher was sending home some progress logs for each day. The back oftentimes looks like a small book! When I was a kid and I said something inappropriate (regardless if it was a swear word or not) I got to suck on a bar of soap. My sig other's mom used to use crushed chile peppers..... what is considered "politically correct" for disciplining a cussing kid? -- "Many have forgotten this truth, but you must not forget it. You remain responsible, forever, for what you have tamed." ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery "'Kate" wrote in message ... On Tue, 21 Dec 2004 10:22:03 -0700, "slykitten" wrote: My son babbles constantly. More times than not, We simply tell him to go to his room if he has to talk... his door must be closed. We've had to set some really strict rules, especially when riding in the car. Along with that annoying chatter, my son makes sound effects so if he whines or makes a gasping noise, I find myself having to pull over. We've asked our therapist what to do about it. I've f ound myself sometimes telling my son that if he doesn't be quiet, he will find himself losing a priviledge. Sadly, it doesn't matter. We find ourselves thankful for school. Unfortunately, even his special ed teacher has found him to be annoying. My son is constantly chattering. The only time we ever hear anything BUT his voice is when he's asleep! I'd be very interested to see if there are any other ways to deal with this. My son is 8...... Unfortunately, I know exactly the frustration you're feeling. Not to make light of this because I know what listening to this is like and removing myself from the vicinity was the only solution at the time until he learned self control. But I keep remembering Kelly Bundy having to figure out the difference between "out loud" and "thinking" by putting her hand on her throat to feel the vibrations. If nothing is "thought", then maybe it's because these kids don't know they can think without talking? Just a thought. :-) 'Kate |
#10
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"'Kate" wrote in message Oh goodness. Poor kid. I've felt like that too. This is the same child that spends hours playing games, watching TV and multi tasking everything known to childhood in such a way that it is bigger, more, harder and more traumatising to the mother that any other kid. Not to mention the dozens of therapists, gurus, doctors and mumbo jumbo men involved in this boys life. I think that the mother (slykitten) just gets off on jumping in on a thread with an attention seeking response. Her son is all things to all threads, but bigger! Dennis |
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