A debate, please

Tiffany wrote in message ...
What do you want to debate about? I feel this is a good article, though I
admit (as always) that I read very quickly. I am sure I could pick it apart
if I had time.

I do want to add that I am sure the percentage is high as far as divorce
and
women taking it all from the husband but I know a lot of folks that
divorced
and that just didn't happen. My parents for one. They didn't divorce until
me and my siblings were almost adults.... I was the youngest at 16-17.
There
was no 'I want the kids', We stayed where we were without thought. Why move
school districts and stuff when we were at an age of moving on our own.
Actually, now that I think about it, my Mom didn't offer for us to live
with
her. Hmm...... well, I might have to bring that up at Christmas. lol She
took NOTHING from my father. She got no money, nothing from the retirement
funds they saved, no properties that she also helped pay for. No all
divorce
ends bad.

True, there are many occasions where it is a better option.

Maybe I should read the article as this might be totally
irreverent...... nah, screw it.


Pity as it will give you a rare insight as to how many, many non-custodial
fathers really feel but never say.

Dennis

Joelle wrote in message

Is anyone able to sum it all up?

Men suffer more than women in divorce and custody.


And I thought it was about a father expressing his feelings and trying to
articulate the reality of separation from his children.

Dennis

Scott wrote in message ...

being a Dad with custody... here are my 2 cents

the non-custodial parent suffers, unless both parents work together to keep
the parenting partnership alive.

This is true. Here in Ireland where divorce is a very recent phenomena, some
interesting facts are emerging.
One of the more frightening is that of nearly all the murders of children,
which has increased dramatically since divorce was introduced, were by the
non-custodial parent. Typically this would be a parent killing all the
children as well as themselves. This has happened equally between both male
and female non-custodial parent and has made enough waves to have the whole
family court system re-visited.

having said that ....

history has proven the courts crucify the fathers and coddle the mothers.

Only recent history, in Victorian times the father always got custody.

hell, I receive $21/mo child support while my x has a good job and does not
report her earnings. what I find more disturbing is that she is now
divorced from the man she left me for and He pays a bucket load of money a
month for the two children they have together. I don't think this is an
unusual situation. i often think about the equal rights amendment when I
think about Dads and custody.

don't get me wrong, I am not bitter about the finances. I worked three
jobs
after my divorce without seeing a dime for years. The few times I
officially questioned the process and was swiftly swept under the rug put
me
in my place (the single dad bin).

I am just happy and thankful being a Dad and praise God that I can spend
every day with my Son, damn the rest-


Personally I would like to help other fathers get somewhere near my
situation. A bit like ****ing in the wind sometimes though.

Dennis

Dennis Here youreply
wrote in message ...

Tiffany wrote in message ...
What do you want to debate about? I feel this is a good article, though I
admit (as always) that I read very quickly. I am sure I could pick it
apart
if I had time.

I do want to add that I am sure the percentage is high as far as divorce
and
women taking it all from the husband but I know a lot of folks that
divorced
and that just didn't happen. My parents for one. They didn't divorce
until
me and my siblings were almost adults.... I was the youngest at 16-17.
There
was no 'I want the kids', We stayed where we were without thought. Why
move
school districts and stuff when we were at an age of moving on our own.
Actually, now that I think about it, my Mom didn't offer for us to live
with
her. Hmm...... well, I might have to bring that up at Christmas. lol She
took NOTHING from my father. She got no money, nothing from the
retirement
funds they saved, no properties that she also helped pay for. No all
divorce
ends bad.

True, there are many occasions where it is a better option.

Maybe I should read the article as this might be totally
irreverent...... nah, screw it.


Pity as it will give you a rare insight as to how many, many non-custodial
fathers really feel but never say.

Dennis



ok.. ok I will read it. Sigh.

But first I will say that my ability to be able to 'feel' for the NCP is
getting harder and harder due to my own situation. I try to focus on the
fact that not all ncp's are like the one I deal with though. It is always
good to hear from the fathers on this board, it helps keep me in check.
Thanks guys. (And I am sure my ex thanks you too as I have yet to kick him
totally out of my daughters life)

Tiff