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Incessant, relentless talking and needing constant attention.



 
 
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  #51  
Old December 25th 04, 04:11 AM
Tiffany
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"peabrainedone" wrote in message
lkaboutsupport.com...
This is not the only usenet group that steveb attempts to control. Be
wary
of his motives. Use Google as your friend to determine who is really
telling the truth.




You don't need to tell us that. We know Steve has control issues. Thanks for
the warning though.

T


  #52  
Old December 25th 04, 04:12 AM
Tiffany
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"'Kate" wrote in message
...
On Sat, 25 Dec 2004 01:46:04 GMT, "CME"
wrote:


"peabrainedone" wrote in message
news:771df4fa0139f0347e92c8c8498ce20b@localhost. talkaboutsupport.com...
This is not the only usenet group that steveb attempts to control. Be
wary
of his motives. Use Google as your friend to determine who is really
telling the truth.


Oh the drama!

Christine


hehe.. especially when we all know who controls this group.

evil laugh
um... BTW... who's in charge this month?

'Kate


Whomever has the paddle.

T


  #53  
Old December 25th 04, 05:08 AM
steveb
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On Sat, 25 Dec 2004 01:24:14 GMT, "CME"
wrote:

Very witty.


Christine dearie ... if wit were ****, you would be severely
constipated

stevey -- further up the food chain
  #54  
Old December 25th 04, 05:10 AM
steveb
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On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 22:09:10 -0500, "Tiffany"
wrote:

.... how do you know who
was supported or not? Get your story straight. You are twisted Steve. That I
can't support.


lmao .... I can count the number of newcomers here since last time ...
and I can read what they are saying.


  #55  
Old December 25th 04, 05:13 AM
steveb
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On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 16:06:02 -0500, "peabrainedone"
wrote:

This is not the only usenet group that steveb attempts to control. Be wary
of his motives. Use Google as your friend to determine who is really
telling the truth.


A Usenet stalker ..... how amusing

your name describes you perfectly, my friend.

Were your brain bigger, you would be a plant

steveb
  #56  
Old December 25th 04, 05:14 AM
steveb
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On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 22:11:04 -0500, "Tiffany"
wrote:


You don't need to tell us that. We know Steve has control issues. Thanks for
the warning though.


You really don't get it do you?

You are such a tramp, you will take support, no questions asked from
anyone, anytime, anywhere.

You question only MY motives ...... lmfao

steveb
  #57  
Old December 25th 04, 01:50 PM
Bebelestrnge0721
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Subject: Incessant, relentless talking and needing constant attention.
From: lm
Date: 12/24/2004 12:28 PM Eastern Standard Time
Message-id:

On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 03:02:55 GMT, 'Kate
wrote:

On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 00:21:00 GMT, lm
wrote:

on temporary emotional support

That's true, and kind, and it's unfortunate that it's not really what
this forum is about.

lm


What do you suggest that we do to provide more support?


Let people vent.

You said in your response to the "seeking texas man" poster, "This
group is about the joy of being a single parent. You're very welcome
stay and chat about your experiences being a single mother."

It's an interesting description, and an honest one. This group is not
really about supporting people who are dealing with becoming or
remaining a single parent. The only threads that don't degenerate into
spats about what this group should be about are little news tidbits
that long-time posters say about their kids. It's a koffee klatch, not
a support group. A half-dozen or so people who have been here for too
long (myself included) -- rather than moving on themselves, they just
chase away newcomers. The group comprises the same people it did 2-3+
years ago. If it's really about only the happyhappyjoyjoy, perhaps the
name ought to be changed to alt.joy.single-parents.

To repeat a much-repeated phrase, it's called "support." The first
year or two of being a single parent are like childbirth -- those of
us who have been here a while can remember that it was very hard, but
we can't still feel the pain. That's a good thing for us, but maybe
what's happened is that when people who are still in that raw stage,
or who are desperate and scared, show us all that emotion and fear and
anger, we don't want to hear it because it brings our own pain back!
So we tell them to take their divorce questions to a.s.divorce and
their child support questions to a.s.child-support.

I could be way off about the reasons for it, but I suppose it doesn't
matter. People who are in pain are turned away because we don't like
the *way* they express their pain. Divorce and child support are part
of being a single parent (not for you, Joelle, we know), and venting
about the other parent is absolutely necessary if a poster needs to,
and doing so on usenet instead of at their kids or at their job or at
the other parent ought to be welcomed rather than discouraged.

What we're left with is some lukewarm flirting by a few members (which
is frowned upon by others), and some self-righteous boot-strapping by
tough-lovers who say you made your bed now lie in it, and every
disagreement on the issues degenerating into a bitch session about
what one poster or another's agenda is. WTF is an agenda? So steveb
thinks of support as something different than Christene does. Who
cares? Jesus if there was a thread called "what should my favorite
color be?" and people didn't agree, the thread would not be about the
plusses and minuses of different colours, or people's own feelings
about or experiences with different colours, but about what an idiot
so-and-so is because they think everyone's favorite colour should be
purple when anyone who's worth their salt knows the best colour is
blue! And who gives a **** about the poor poster who asked the
question in the first place!

I have opinions about some of the posters here too, it's human nature
to develop opinions about people, but my opinions don't belong here if
they're not constructive, so I end up hardly ever posting because it's
a joke.

Kate, do you remember when we talked? You were the soul of compassion.
You were so helpful to me when I was panicked, I was so frightened, I
didn't know what to do, I had no perspective, and there you were, from
2 time zones away, after all you had been through you gave me sound
advice and support. I've thanked you but I don't think I've thanked
you enough, made clear how important that help was for me -- you gave
me information without being cold, and you gave me support without
being mushy -- you were right there in the center and you drew from
both wells in just the right proportions. It helped at the time and
looking back on it, it was the right approach. I have only that
experience and this forum to go on, but I'm convinced you're in the
right field. You are going to be so good at what you do.

I also haven't said how hard it was for me to write that post that
ended up with us on the phone. I was so alone, this forum was *it* for
me at the time, and yet I edited myself so much in that post. I
apologized several times in it, I changed my words, I worried that I
would be flamed, in hindsight it was ridiculous that I should have to
worry like that in the midst of a crisis just to get some advice. And
I only knew to do that because I'd already been posting here a while.
If in the midst of a crisis I googled single parents support and
landed here, I'm sure I wouldnt' have known to post *correctly.*

Since then our life has improved exponentially. I've married, we've
moved away from the boys' father, I have legal custody, and we've
reached a point that the boys just a few weeks back called their
father for the first time, no occasion, just because they wanted to. I
don't need to be on this forum, and there isn't much to be here for --
I'm only still here because I'd like someday to be able to pay it
forward. That's an effect of your support.

The tough-love approach is absolutely valid. Giving people the
no-bull****-facts may well help in the long run, and it's certainly a
valid understanding of what support should be.

But the poor-baby-I-know-it's-hard approach is absolutely valid. It
may only have a momentary effect, but sometimes that's all that's
needed, and it too is a valid understanding of support.

The reason there's so little support on this forum is not that some
people are too cold, or that some people are too soft. It's that the
two won't get off each other's backs. Any response to new posters is
absolutely valid, if it's really to the poster and not a nudge-nudge
to other posters. Sitting around and congratulating ourselves that
we're better than they are is pathetic.

Different approaches and opinions are the point of a forum -- if you
want only one point of view you can get that from e-mail.

lm







lm, Excellent ! Every last word ! From your heart and most definately
appreciated. Bev
  #58  
Old December 25th 04, 02:43 PM
Bebelestrnge0721
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Subject: Incessant, relentless talking and needing constant attention.
From: 'Kate
Date: 12/24/2004 4:26 PM Eastern


I was threatened. I was bereated. I'm not willing to

be treated like that again for trying the best that I knew how to ease someone
else's pain.


Kate,
As much as I know this probably is not directed at me, I feel it. For the year
we spent communicating I thought more than you did that we were developing a
friendship ( I think) I screwed it up , I have taken that responsibility. I
haven't understood why you couldn't see the mess I made things happened because
of your kindness at a time death seemed better than life, you made yourself
there for me, I was very vulnerable and broken. Not to place blame on you, It
surely was not your fault I was weak. I just want to say that those feelings
you typed about what has happened to you personally by trying to help people I
hear them , they mean something to me, and I have realised the harm I caused
you and that I am sorry I did. I just wish someday you will see that I am not
some crazed idiot on the net that you have to fear because of what I said to
you ( Awful angry words that were to hurt you as much as I hurt inside, at the
time you were the closest person to my heart) It was painful lip service and
wrong of me to do. You may never forgive me and that would be something I will
have to learn to accept. You touched my life as I know you have touched many
others and that is what makes it important to me for you to accept my apology
one day. I understand the caution and I am ashamed of the part of the fear
within you that I am responsible for. IRL I have never been unable to find
forgiveness for a mistake I made , I'm not asking for dinner and a movie, but
someday maybe an acknowledgement of my apology.
I am sorry for my stupidity back then PLease forgive me. Bev

  #59  
Old December 26th 04, 02:51 AM
Tiffany
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"steveb" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 22:09:10 -0500, "Tiffany"
wrote:

.... how do you know who
was supported or not? Get your story straight. You are twisted Steve. That
I
can't support.


lmao .... I can count the number of newcomers here since last time ...
and I can read what they are saying.



So then you didn't stay away for a year. Stop lying.

Steve, you complain and complain. Why don't you start your own group and be
done with it? Or do you just like to hear yourself bitch?

T


  #60  
Old December 26th 04, 02:51 AM
Tiffany
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"'Kate" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 24 Dec 2004 22:12:44 -0500, "Tiffany"
wrote:


"'Kate" wrote in message
. ..
On Sat, 25 Dec 2004 01:46:04 GMT, "CME"
wrote:


"peabrainedone" wrote in message
news:771df4fa0139f0347e92c8c8498ce20b@localhos t.talkaboutsupport.com...
This is not the only usenet group that steveb attempts to control. Be
wary
of his motives. Use Google as your friend to determine who is really
telling the truth.

Oh the drama!

Christine

hehe.. especially when we all know who controls this group.

evil laugh
um... BTW... who's in charge this month?

'Kate


Whomever has the paddle.

T


Damn.... I think I lent it to Cele and she's in NY with you know who.
g

'Kate



Atleast the paddle is getting use! lol

T


 




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