Colorado: More "Custody", but still....

This message isn't for all of you. But if there are some Dad's who feel
utterly defeated regarding trying to achieve a parenting plan that you are more
comfortable with, I have a victory to share that may benefit you.

Over a year ago, I filed for a Change in Parenting Plan due to frustration from
not getting anywhere negotiating with my younger kids' Mom. Unfortunately, we
had a Stipulated agreement that we would file a change in Child Support the 1st
of this year. For whatever reason, the child support bit got all tangled up
with the parenting plan negotiations. (Yes, I understand the logic, but it's
unfortunate.)

I realize that this is a Child Support forum, and even though my post has a
mention of child support, it is actually a Custody issue.

I've stated this opinion before on this forum, and some of you didn't much care
for it and even told me to "grow up". But it's over tomorrow, and I want to
encourage you all yet one more time to consider the road I've taken.

I agreed to having the Court appoint a Special Advocate to represent the
children in our negotiations. In a state, no, in a metropolis (Denver), that
has the reputation for being so extremely harsh on Dads in this situation, I'm
happy as can be with the result.

Somebody here suggested something like, "Yeah, but what are you going to do
when they start accusing you of molesting your children..." and other things or
something along those lines. My reply was that I believed that if you just
retain your integrity and stay honest, then the lies will eventually be
revealed.

Well, unfortunately, not all the lies have been revealed, not just yet, anyway,
but enough so that I am now confident that the parenting plan that we developed
with the Special Advocate is far superior than what would have developed had I
fought the process or surrendered.

My endorsement to all of you is... even though the "system" may be slanted
against you, look for parts of it that have potential. In Colorado, it's the
Special Advocate for the children. As hard as the process has been, it has
taken the least toll on the children than it would have been without the
Special Advocate. And because of the stigma against me as a Dad in this area,
I came a heck of a lot closer to my objectives taking this route than any
other.

It's never over, but after tomorrow... it's over for a while. I hope the same
for some of you.
__________________________________________________ _______________________
Puddleglum's my name. But it doesn't matter if you forget it. I can always tell
you again.

"David Sullivan" wrote in message
...
This message isn't for all of you. But if there are some Dad's who feel
utterly defeated regarding trying to achieve a parenting plan that you are
more
comfortable with, I have a victory to share that may benefit you.

Thanks for sharing!

It's nice to hear someone who's not going to give up and looks for the
positive and works that positive towards finding the best results.

Papa

"David Sullivan" wrote in message
...
This message isn't for all of you. But if there are some Dad's who feel
utterly defeated regarding trying to achieve a parenting plan that you are
more
comfortable with, I have a victory to share that may benefit you.

Thanks for sharing!

It's nice to hear someone who's not going to give up and looks for the
positive and works that positive towards finding the best results.

Papa

And thank you "Papa"!

I posted that the day before our final Court date. The reality of the
situation far surpassed my expectations. Had I waited until AFTER Court, I'd
have had way too much to say. I'll try not to say too much here. ... Only
enough to emphasize my earlier recommendation.

The kids' mother and I successfully negotiated everything that was important
(to me) regarding a new parenting plan and also regarding child support. It
was wonderful and perfect. Without the watchful eye of the Court Appointed
Special Advocate for the children, I truly believe that this could not have
happened. And our negotiations resulted in what I believe to be a perfect
resolution for this time. I am so incredibly happy about it and I hope that
all you other abused-by-the-system parents can be equally as fortunate.

But the biggest joy of all was what happened in the Courtroom. Her Attorney
must have really been upset with me, my Attorney, and the Special Advocate...
or SOMETHING. But we went into Court with what we believed was a complete
settlement until her Attorney opened his mouth. From that point forward, all I
heard was lies, complaints, whining, argumentativeness, oh my, If only I could
provide enough adequate adjectives!

My Attorney advised me to just let it ride, so I did. Neither he nor I
interjected and thus allowed the opposing Attorney to make a complete idiot out
of himself (at least from my perspective.) Regardless of any of the garbage
that he had to say, the joy was in what followed.

My Attorney followed with a brief counter to everything her Attorney threw out
there and told the Judge that his client (myself) was simply asking for the
strictest interpretation of the law to be applied to each issue. And he
specified the statutes and what they said, and he rested his presentation.
That was ALL!

So the Judge asked the Special Advocate if he wanted to say anything. I won't
detail what he said because it is personal among me, my kids, and their Mother.
But I will generalize that his words were highly directed at the conflict that
her Attorney was responsible for. The man was a Saint! He legitimized
EVERYTHING that I have set out to do and ALL the expenses that I have had to
pay.

So the ruling was....? The judge ruled EVERYTHING in my favor. Without the
careful and watchful eye of the Special Advocate folks.... I'm SURE this would
have never happened.

And the most vindicating occurrence of all, you ask? It was right before the
Judge handed down her ruling. She told the opposing Counsel: "You may not much
care for the ruling that I'm about to hand down. And if you don't, you are
certainly welcome to appeal the case. But before you do, I suggest that you
first look at Colorado laws and make an attempt to change them because my
ruling will follow the strictest interpretation of those laws." And..... it
did.

Well folks, I have to tell you. Follow the rules, spend the money on the
resources that are available who will serve the most to focus on truth and
sincerity. If you're as fortunate as I have been, then you also may be given a
sight of the light at the end of the tunnel.

And most importantly of all.... your kids will be promised a better future
than if you choose the route of fighting the injustice of the child support
system.

I shall step down from my soap box. And I believe some of you may be angered.
But I hope that those of you who needed encouragement.... are.... encouraged.

God Bless you ALL!

David


"PapaPolarBear" wrote in message

Thanks for sharing!

It's nice to hear someone who's not going to give up and looks for the
positive and works that positive towards finding the best results.

Papa

__________________________________________________ _______________________
Puddleglum's my name. But it doesn't matter if you forget it. I can always tell
you again.

And thank you "Papa"!

I posted that the day before our final Court date. The reality of the
situation far surpassed my expectations. Had I waited until AFTER Court, I'd
have had way too much to say. I'll try not to say too much here. ... Only
enough to emphasize my earlier recommendation.

The kids' mother and I successfully negotiated everything that was important
(to me) regarding a new parenting plan and also regarding child support. It
was wonderful and perfect. Without the watchful eye of the Court Appointed
Special Advocate for the children, I truly believe that this could not have
happened. And our negotiations resulted in what I believe to be a perfect
resolution for this time. I am so incredibly happy about it and I hope that
all you other abused-by-the-system parents can be equally as fortunate.

But the biggest joy of all was what happened in the Courtroom. Her Attorney
must have really been upset with me, my Attorney, and the Special Advocate...
or SOMETHING. But we went into Court with what we believed was a complete
settlement until her Attorney opened his mouth. From that point forward, all I
heard was lies, complaints, whining, argumentativeness, oh my, If only I could
provide enough adequate adjectives!

My Attorney advised me to just let it ride, so I did. Neither he nor I
interjected and thus allowed the opposing Attorney to make a complete idiot out
of himself (at least from my perspective.) Regardless of any of the garbage
that he had to say, the joy was in what followed.

My Attorney followed with a brief counter to everything her Attorney threw out
there and told the Judge that his client (myself) was simply asking for the
strictest interpretation of the law to be applied to each issue. And he
specified the statutes and what they said, and he rested his presentation.
That was ALL!

So the Judge asked the Special Advocate if he wanted to say anything. I won't
detail what he said because it is personal among me, my kids, and their Mother.
But I will generalize that his words were highly directed at the conflict that
her Attorney was responsible for. The man was a Saint! He legitimized
EVERYTHING that I have set out to do and ALL the expenses that I have had to
pay.

So the ruling was....? The judge ruled EVERYTHING in my favor. Without the
careful and watchful eye of the Special Advocate folks.... I'm SURE this would
have never happened.

And the most vindicating occurrence of all, you ask? It was right before the
Judge handed down her ruling. She told the opposing Counsel: "You may not much
care for the ruling that I'm about to hand down. And if you don't, you are
certainly welcome to appeal the case. But before you do, I suggest that you
first look at Colorado laws and make an attempt to change them because my
ruling will follow the strictest interpretation of those laws." And..... it
did.

Well folks, I have to tell you. Follow the rules, spend the money on the
resources that are available who will serve the most to focus on truth and
sincerity. If you're as fortunate as I have been, then you also may be given a
sight of the light at the end of the tunnel.

And most importantly of all.... your kids will be promised a better future
than if you choose the route of fighting the injustice of the child support
system.

I shall step down from my soap box. And I believe some of you may be angered.
But I hope that those of you who needed encouragement.... are.... encouraged.

God Bless you ALL!

David


"PapaPolarBear" wrote in message

Thanks for sharing!

It's nice to hear someone who's not going to give up and looks for the
positive and works that positive towards finding the best results.

Papa

__________________________________________________ _______________________
Puddleglum's my name. But it doesn't matter if you forget it. I can always tell
you again.