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#1
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Tandem advice?
I'm still nursing my 2-year-old before naps & at night. He nurses sometimes
if he hurts himself, but he mostly doesn't want to. He hasn't nursed a lot more since the baby was born. He comes over to take a sip occasionally just to see if he can. I'm totally fine with this. My problem is bedtimes. We cosleep and I would always snuggle up to him and let him nurse until he fell asleep, and then I would roll over and sleep myself. He wakes up sometimes and wants to nurse. That's been fine. Now I'm having difficulty because I need to latch the newborn on and sometimes that's a little difficult. Alexander was getting upset last night because he didn't like leaning over me to nurse while I nursed Jack. He got overtired and cried a lot, and I felt really bad. :-/ My husband held him and snuggled, but that wasn't what Alexander wanted. I was thinking that tonight I'll try to nurse him to sleep while my husband holds Jack and see if that works out better. I don't know what to do about the middle-of-the-night feedings though. Any tips or advice on how to tandem successfully are greatly appreciated. I don't want to wean him at this point though. -- Rebecca Jo Mama to Alexander 6/6/05 & Jack 7/7/07 |
#2
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Tandem advice?
I've not done it myself (well, barely, DS had weaned, but tried to nurse
again and didn't like the taste), there is a book, "adventures in tandem nursing" that others have recommended, you could also look at kellymom.com, I think there are several tips there, also use google groups for the archive of this group, I'm sure some people have posted some detailed info on how they managed, or how their wife did. I seem to recall that most solutions required extra pillows, so you might want a stack by your bed! Cheers Anne |
#3
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Tandem advice?
DD was 2 when DS was born and had been fully weaned for about 8
months, but then restarted when he was 3 months old. (The old "let her try if she asks and she won't like it plan completely backfired on me) and so I tandemed for about 6 months. So DS wasn't a newborn, but 3 months. However, DD was quite happy after a little while to bend over backwards (literally) in order to nurse. Or, I could lie on my back, with a pillow to tip me towards the baby and DD would lie on her stomach, lifting her head up to nurse. She could be a bit cranky about sharing at times, but adjusted pretty rapidly. Things got trickier when DS started to reach for her, she would grab his hand and push it over to "his" side. But it was just the sweetest thing when they would look into each others eyes and smile, and they still are pretty close sibs. jj |
#4
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Tandem advice?
"Anne Rogers" wrote:
I've not done it myself (well, barely, DS had weaned, but tried to nurse again and didn't like the taste), there is a book, "adventures in tandem nursing" that others have recommended, you could also look at kellymom.com, I think there are several tips there, also use google groups for the archive of this group, I'm sure some people have posted some detailed info on how they managed, or how their wife did. I seem to recall that most solutions required extra pillows, so you might want a stack by your bed! Cheers Anne Thanks! I'll look that book up. I've already looked at kellymom. I'll google the group when I have time. I appreciate the advice. rj |
#5
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Tandem advice?
"JJ" wrote:
DD was 2 when DS was born and had been fully weaned for about 8 months, but then restarted when he was 3 months old. (The old "let her try if she asks and she won't like it plan completely backfired on me) and so I tandemed for about 6 months. So DS wasn't a newborn, but 3 months. However, DD was quite happy after a little while to bend over backwards (literally) in order to nurse. Or, I could lie on my back, with a pillow to tip me towards the baby and DD would lie on her stomach, lifting her head up to nurse. She could be a bit cranky about sharing at times, but adjusted pretty rapidly. Things got trickier when DS started to reach for her, she would grab his hand and push it over to "his" side. But it was just the sweetest thing when they would look into each others eyes and smile, and they still are pretty close sibs. jj aww that sounds darling. We're figuring it out, slowly but surely. rj |
#6
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Tandem advice?
My problem is bedtimes. We cosleep and I would always snuggle up to him and
let him nurse until he fell asleep, and then I would roll over and sleep myself. He wakes up sometimes and wants to nurse. That's been fine. Now I'm having difficulty because I need to latch the newborn on and sometimes that's a little difficult. Alexander was getting upset last night because he didn't like leaning over me to nurse while I nursed Jack. He got overtired and cried a lot, and I felt really bad. :-/ My husband held him and snuggled, but that wasn't what Alexander wanted. I had this difficulty in the early days both times. I feel for you. I was thinking that tonight I'll try to nurse him to sleep while my husband holds Jack and see if that works out better. This is a really good idea. With our youngest, I would nurse her before bedtime, then pass her off to my husband and nurse my son to sleep. I don't know what to do about the middle-of-the-night feedings though. Any tips or advice on how to tandem successfully are greatly appreciated. I don't want to wean him at this point though. The middle of the night thing is very hard, especially in the early days when you are so tired too. After a while your two year old will probably be willing to choose between leaning over nursing or waiting for lying down nursing. One thing I did at bedtime when my husband was out of town was to sit cross-legged in bed propping with pillows while nursing them to sleep in a modified football hold. After they were asleep, I would carefully latch them off one by one and slide them into the correct position. You may or may not want to try this in the middle of the night, since it could set a precedent. Another method I used when I just really wanted to get them back to sleep quickly without the fuss was to go on knees and elbows over them - no fun for me, but sometimes easier than dealing with screaming children. --Betsy |
#7
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Tandem advice?
"betsy" wrote:
I had this difficulty in the early days both times. I feel for you. Alexander is being more accepting of my husband's comforting, and my husband has been finding it easier to get him to sleep the last couple nights. Yay. This is a really good idea. With our youngest, I would nurse her before bedtime, then pass her off to my husband and nurse my son to sleep. I tried this and it didn't really work out that well. Jack started screaming to be nursed, and Alexander wasn't done and kept getting upset that the baby was screaming. We'll keep trying. The middle of the night thing is very hard, especially in the early days when you are so tired too. After a while your two year old will probably be willing to choose between leaning over nursing or waiting for lying down nursing. nods. The adjustment period is rough. One thing I did at bedtime when my husband was out of town was to sit cross-legged in bed propping with pillows while nursing them to sleep in a modified football hold. After they were asleep, I would carefully latch them off one by one and slide them into the correct position. You may or may not want to try this in the middle of the night, since it could set a precedent. Another method I used when I just really wanted to get them back to sleep quickly without the fuss was to go on knees and elbows over them - no fun for me, but sometimes easier than dealing with screaming children. --Betsy The cross-legged thing sounds like it'd work really great for naps. I'll try this, thanks! Rebecca |
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