What is the typical behaviour of a twelve year old?

Hi!
Does anybody know a good article on behaviour of twelve year olds?

One of my colleagues was taxed as behaving like a twelve year old,
because he nearly screemed and didnt let the other part (our professor)
finish during a discussion about a mark he got for an exam.

The only things I found so far are a wikipedia article with little
information and tons of advertisments for pyschology books on youth
development.

Thanks a bundle,
Nikolaus


--
Yes, Yes, Yes, more of the DnD flavor
MC Beholder on the mike, DJ Mindflayer kicking it massive

In article , Nikolaus Wagner says...

Hi!
Does anybody know a good article on behaviour of twelve year olds?

One of my colleagues was taxed as behaving like a twelve year old,
because he nearly screemed and didnt let the other part (our professor)
finish during a discussion about a mark he got for an exam.

The only things I found so far are a wikipedia article with little
information and tons of advertisments for pyschology books on youth
development.

As in having a hissy fit 'cause he didn't get his way?

Yep, that's rather typical for a twelve year old. It's developmental as there
are growing capabilities and desires to assert oneself in the world, but the
emotional and mental wherewithall is not present yet to deal with the inevitable
roadbloacks and complications. Things like - that others have legitimate
completing interests and concerns to those dear to oneself, and that one needs
to earn certain benefits that one sees accruing to others in the world. There
is a spurt of brain activity that occurs in the teen years, synaptic activity
similar to that of the toddlers years of development, that may correspond to
the formation of the more subtle social concepts. An early adolescent is on the
doorstep of this process. There is also a snotty and sarcastic manner (think
eye-rolling, hands on hip, tsk'ing) that this age is famous for.

Most likely, if you're close (possibly - indistinguishably close?) to your
colleague, what I have in brackets is how you would counsel him. Possibly, the
manner of your colleague contributed to this assessement. Or might even be all
of the problem. Even legitimate and reasoned objection, delivered in an
immature snooty manner, might suggest a 12 year old.

Cheers,
Banty (mother of 13 year old)

I am the mother of a twelve year old son, and I've also got a 14 year
old boy and an eight year old girl.

I dunno if you can be that precise with stamping specific behaviours
with specific ages. Every kids comes born with their own temperment and
personality, and every one is going to develop at a different pace in
different areas. Emotional control and maturity happens at different
rates in different people - and obviously - some people, like your
collegue, never learn it.

Whether the behaviour was typical of an 8 year old, a 12 year old, or a
14 year old, the point is that it was completely inappropriate
behaviour for an adult. It showed a lack of maturity, a lack of self
control, a lack of respect and restraint, a lack of judgement.
Essentially he had a hissy fit against an authority figure, and didn't
even do the professor the courtesy of hearing him out.

I've had many discussions with my oldest son (now in Grade 9 high
school) about his perception of "fairness". In the end, unless its a
subject where there is an absolute wrong or right answer, like a math
problem, or the conjugation of a verb in French, there is a degree of
subjectivity in marking, and the teacher is often looking for things
other than straight facts.

I tell my son all the time, you don't have to like it, but marks come
down to a game. The teacher is in authority. They have knowledge and
experience you don't have. You don't have to LIKE what they want out of
you, but if you want the marks, you have to give them what they want.
So, my son having a hissy fit about marks for neatness, or format of an
essay won't get him anywhere. Its part of what the teacher expects. So
he can beat himself against the wall all he wants, and it won't get him
any closer to the A he wants. I also find with my son that he doesn't
always READ the darned question or assignment, so big surprise, he
loses marks because he hasn't given the teacher exactly what they
wanted, which is part of the transaction he needed to complete in
exchange for those marks.

I can still remember being in first year university and being totally
shocked at my first essay mark. I'd always been an A student in high
school, and my university English professor in first year was an
absolute stickler for style, format, correct cites etc. I got
slaughtered - I think it was a C -, all because of things other than
the content itself. However, it was completely sobering, I learned from
it, and thereafter, I paid attention to those details!! I figured out
the guy didn't just care about the facts, he cared about how I put the
argument together, how I presented it - which is just as valid a learn
(and probably more so in the bigger picture) as what influences some
19th century poet had.

My take on this stuff is that what you take away from these experiences
that has real value is not the facts from the courses you've taken but
HOW to research, how to write, how to construct arguments....and how to
accept criticism without flipping out.

Imagine your collegue in a work environment. Its career limiting to
have snit fits. Never mind what it does to marriages.

Mary G.

wrote:
SNIP
I can still remember being in first year university and being totally
shocked at my first essay mark. I'd always been an A student in high
school, and my university English professor in first year was an
absolute stickler for style, format, correct cites etc. I got
slaughtered - I think it was a C -, all because of things other than
the content itself. However, it was completely sobering, I learned from
it, and thereafter, I paid attention to those details!! I figured out
the guy didn't just care about the facts, he cared about how I put the
argument together, how I presented it - which is just as valid a learn
(and probably more so in the bigger picture) as what influences some
19th century poet had.

My take on this stuff is that what you take away from these experiences
that has real value is not the facts from the courses you've taken but
HOW to research, how to write, how to construct arguments....and how to
accept criticism without flipping out.

Imagine your collegue in a work environment. Its career limiting to
have snit fits. Never mind what it does to marriages.

Of course, the lack of comprehension is not always limited to students.
Like you, I received one of my few *C* grades on an essay my freshman
year in college. I went to see the professor and asked, *why did I get
a C?* *Oh,* he replied. "Your exam was one of the first I graded, and
I had expected more from all of the students. After I graded the other
exams, I meant to change your grade to a B.* After he did, I asked,
*why did I get a B?* He was shocked. *I'm not changing your grade to
an A.* *I never asked you to change it in the first place. I asked
you why I got that grade, so I can do better next time. The question
hasn't changed.*

Barbara

"Nikolaus Wagner" wrote in
message ...
Hi!
Does anybody know a good article on behaviour of twelve year olds?

One of my colleagues was taxed as behaving like a twelve year old, because
he nearly screemed and didnt let the other part (our professor) finish
during a discussion about a mark he got for an exam.


Sounds about right.

Does he also take freshly laundered clothes with instructions to put them
away, and just toss them to the floor? I just had an eleven year old
daughter do that. Responses to queries as to why she did that, or to
correct the behavior were loud whiny moans or a scream.

My response to that is he is not allowed to go to a Friday afternoon
meeting, nor a Saturday evening "Girl's Movie Night" until she puts them
away, along with cull through the mess that is in her room. Sure, she could
walk out and get herself to these events... but I am pretty sure that she
knows that disobedience on something like that would cause all her internet
and phone access to be cut off (she is an honor student... she may be going
through puberty, but she's not stupid!).

I found this series of articles on general adolescent health and
development. Just read through the series of articles:
http://www.chop.edu/consumer/your_ch...x.jsp?id=-9388

I always thought one of the greatest curses to put on someone is to make
them repeat puberty!

(we just rented a cute movie called "Sky High"... one of the characters
complained that she went through it twice!).



The only things I found so far are a wikipedia article with little
information and tons of advertisments for pyschology books on youth
development.

Thanks a bundle,
Nikolaus


--
Yes, Yes, Yes, more of the DnD flavor
MC Beholder on the mike, DJ Mindflayer kicking it massive

HCN wrote:
I always thought one of the greatest curses to put on someone is to
make
them repeat puberty!

Mary replies:
ROTFL! Way true. Whenever I wish I could get back some time, I never,
ever wish I could be a teen again. Too horrible. High
school.....shudder! Even college was less fun than advertised due to
all the angst, growing pains, stupid stuff I did, stupid stuff my
friends did....like.... once was ENOUGH.

Maybe late 20's at the youngest for me, but perhaps it took me longer
than some to figure out who I was and get comfortable in my own skin
(plus gain some perspective on a problematic relationship with the
parental units). Bleh!

The only part I want back is being able to eat whatever I want and not
gain weight.

M.